hey, i'm delaney

Since your surgical internship had begun, you’ve had very little time for a social life. Outside of your work friends, you hardly ever saw anyone else. Your life consisted of work and sleep (although let’s be honest, sleeping was not always something you got to do.) You didn’t even know your previous neighbor had moved out until you met the new neighbor as he moved in. 

It was the end of an excruciatingly long shift the day he moved in–you had been on call all night, and all you wanted to do was get into bed and sleep for the next twelve hours. You’d practically stumbled into the lift and was just about to press the button to your floor when you heard a voice yelling for you to hold the doors.

You, somewhat reluctantly, complied. Your bed could wait two extra seconds. When the man ran into the elevator, carrying two boxes easily, you were simultaneously grateful and horrified that you’d waited.

One one hand, this guy was hot. Like, hot hot. He had tattoos running down both arms, beautiful long hair, and a jawline so perfect you didn’t think the plastic surgeon at your hospital could recreate it. 

Now the old you, the pre-internship you, would’ve been all over him. You know that you’re attractive, and with the right outfit (and maybe a shot of tequila for the nerves) you could definitely pull this guy. However, at this point in time, you were not in the right outfit. You had messy hair, scrubs you’d been wearing for two days straight, and you were sure you had giant bags under your eyes. This was not ideal. So, you just looked down, hoping he’d get off the lift before your floor and forget all about the mess of a person he’d seen.

“I’m Sirius.” You looked up at the sound of his voice, to find the man not ignoring you, but instead happily holding his hand out towards you. You accept it, shaking his hand. 

“Like the star?” You asked. He nodded, impressed that you knew of it. “I’m Y/N.” You glanced at his boxes, “You moving in?”

“Yeah. 4b.”

Your eyes widened, just as the lift opened. “Oh. I guess that makes us neighbors.” You stepped out before him, moving to stand by your own front door, labeled 4a. “So I’ll see you around?”

“I’ll be looking forward to it.” The smirk on his face should’ve turned you off–it was obvious Sirius knew exactly what kind of thoughts were going through your head. Yet somehow, he managed to find the line between charming and cocky with ease. You quickly turned around, unlocking your door, ready to let the memory of your new neighbor slip away with sleep. 

~~~

You didn’t see Sirius too often–there was an occasional run in in the hallways, but nothing more than small talk and smiles passed between the two of you. The next time you had a real conversation was under much better circumstances…for you, anyways. 

You were on your way home from a rare calm shift at work. No traumas entered the ER, only a few small surgeries–it was nice having a break from the normal hospital chaos. You made it home from work early enough that you might even be able to see some of your friends that you hadn’t been able to see properly for months.

As you walked towards the entrance of your building, your eyes immediately landed on Sirius. He was standing with a couple other men, talking animatedly about something. As you moved closer, you could hear and see what was so exciting for him–a new motorcycle. 

“So you weren’t getting enough dates on your own, Pads? Need a motorcycle to get some?”

“This is not about getting dates Moony, I’ve always wanted a motorcycle! But if my motorcycle happens to help me get dates…” He said, making the other two men laugh. It was at this point Sirius noticed you walking towards your building. “What do you think, 4a? Will the bike help me get a date?” With you, he continued in his head. 

4a was the name he’d taken to calling you. At one point he’d said that he would come up with a cooler nickname once you knew each other better, but as you were always working, that hadn’t happened yet. 

“Well, I do have lots of friends who find guys on motorcycles sexy, but…” Sirius’ smile disappeared at the last word before you continued, “When I think motorcycle my first thought isn’t sexy, it’s accident waiting to happen.” Sirius scoffed, while the other men laughed at his expense. The shorter one moved to stand with you before speaking.

“I’m with her, Pads. The motorcycle is a bad idea and I vote no. Peter Pettigrew, by the way.” He held out his hand for you to shake, which you happily accepted as you introduced yourself. 

“Wormtail you traitor!” Sirius said, hopping onto his new bike, “Not that it matters what you lot think, because this is not up to a vote. The bike stays.” He turned on the engine, allowing the machine to roar to life. 

“At least get a helmet!” You spoke loudly over the noise, before turning to head up the stairs to the entrance of your apartment building. Before you could reach the door, however, you heard a crash. Instinct kicking in, you turned and swiftly moved to Sirius. It appeared he’d lost his balance on the bike, falling off of it and hitting his head on the pavement. Luckily, his two friends had caught the bike before it landed on Sirius. 

Sirius tried to stand up, wanting to shake off the fall so his friends wouldn’t make fun of him too much (he was already trying to figure out how many galleons he’d have to give Moony and Wormtail to not tell Prongs. He’d never be able to live it down.) Instead of being able to stand, however, he found himself unable to sit up, let alone get off the ground. His vision blurred, and it wasn’t until his cute neighbor was in his line of sight that he regained his bearings.

“Careful, careful, you need to sit up slowly, okay?” You immediately jumped into doctor mode. There were some small cuts on his arm, but nothing a bit of rubbing alcohol and some bandages couldn’t fix. You were mostly worried he’d have a concussion. “Can you tell me your name?”

“Sirius, like the star.”

“Like the star, that’s right–” Before you could continue your assessment, Sirius spoke again.

“I may be named after a star, but you look like one.” This gave you pause. Behind you, the boys were cracking up. 

“Does that line usually work for you?”

“...yes?” You let out a slight giggle.

“Perhaps it works better when you haven’t just fallen off a motorcycle. Now, what day is it today?” You moved a finger in front of his face as he spoke, watching carefully as his eyes tracked its movements. 

“Tuesday.”

“Who is the prime minister?”

“Um…that lady. The one Moony is always complaining about.” You turned to look at the taller boy, who you assumed was Moony. He nodded, confirming that Sirius was actually talking about Thatcher, even if he couldn’t remember her name. 

“Close enough, I guess.” You slowly helped Sirius stand up, talking to his friends as you did so. “I don’t think he has a concussion, but if he starts feeling nauseous or faint, the ER is only a couple blocks from here. I can run up to my flat and grab my first aid kit if you’d like–”

“Oh, that’s alright. We’ll fix him up.” There was a bit of an odd look shared between the men, but you didn’t pay too much mind. Sirius was now standing on his own, no longer looking to be too dazed. You were sure he’d be fine.

“I won’t say I told you so, but please buy a helmet Sirius.”

“What if I liked having you dote over me?” He smirked.

You rolled her eyes. “If that’s what you want, all you have to do is ask.” You began heading up the stairs, “But don’t expect me to say yes until you’ve bought the helmet!” You gave him one last glance, heading inside before you could regret your bold move.

“C’mon lads.” Sirius made sure the bike was parked properly before making a move to the nearest apparition point. 

“Where are we going?” Remus asked, as he and Peter walked behind him.

“To buy a helmet, obviously.”

~~~

taglist:

Penelope Garcia is, occasionally, too curious for her own good. She really doesn’t mean to snoop in her friend’s lives like this, but to be fair, she didn’t know she was snooping in Spencer’s life when she started. She thought she was just learning more about her most recent celebrity obsession; rising star and incredible actress, Y/N Y/L/N. She hadn’t even gone too far with it yet, really! It all started after she’d left the movie theater, where she finally got to see Y/N’s newest movie with Derek. He dropped her off at home, and she decided to follow the actress on instagram and scroll through some of her posts. Which is when she found one from three months ago that looked weirdly familiar. It was just a picture of some bookshelves, but she couldn’t shake the feeling. Then she saw that Y/N had tagged the location, and it was in D.C. The celebrity hadn’t given up the exact name of the bookstore; a slight annoyance for Penelope, but she knew it was probably just so Y/N would be able to visit the place again without a crowd of fans or paparazzi, so she’d let it slide this time. Penelope isn’t one to frequent bookstores, but she remembered Spencer had taken herself and JJ to a small bookshop when they had decided their new year's resolutions would be to read more often. Spencer kept trying to get them to read the classics, but both women were shopping the romance section, much to Spencer’s annoyance. So, she called an amused Derek back to her place so he could take her there.

“So we’re doing this because some actress may have been to the same bookstore three months ago?” He asked, driving with one hand as he talked to Penelope. 

“Well when you say it like that it sounds silly!” She said, still scrolling through the instagram page. “Besides, it’s not just that, a lot of these pictures are in Quantico! What’s a big name actress like her doing here?” Since the discovery of the bookshop picture, she’d found 3 more that were obviously in the city; a well known coffee shop, a mall Penelope has spent way too much money at, and a picture of a sign from the nearest highway. There were some others that she thought might be, but there was no definitive proof to be found.

“She probably just has family here, baby girl.”

“Um, do I look like an amateur to you, hot stuff? The first thing I looked for was her family, who are all happily living far, far, away, thank you very much.” The next picture she scrolled to gave her pause. It was a picture of a TV with a still from Y/N’s breakout show on it, but a coffee table, with someone’s sock-clad feet on it, was just barely visible. The socks were covered with the logo for her show. It was captioned “Will it ever stop being weird to see myself on TV?”

“Does this look familiar to you?” Penelope held the phone in Derek’s line of sight, causing him to swerve the car a little and push her hand out of the way.

“Do you think that could wait until I’m not driving?” Penelope just rolled her eyes, taking a screenshot of the picture for future reference. In just a few short minutes, they were pulling into the parking lot of the bookstore. Penelope rushed in, with Derek strolling behind her. She quickly found the spot that was featured in Y/N’s instagram post. 

“See! Told ya it was here!” She said, showing Derek the picture so he could compare it himself. 

“Yup, definitely it is the same place. I still don’t see why this is a big deal though.”

Penelope opened her mouth to argue with him, but was interrupted by the store’s owner; a little old lady. “Can I help you two find anything today?” 

“Oh, no ma’am. I just saw your store on my favorite actress’s instagram, and wanted to see it for myself.” Penelope explained, feeling a little bad for wasting the woman’s time. Maybe she’d find a book to buy, even though she’s not even finished with the last book she bought here.

“Oh! Miss Y/L/N, right? She and her boyfriend are around here all the time! What a nice little couple; her boyfriend is a little skinny though, I really need to make some cookies for him the next time they come by.” The woman explained, walking over to the wall of the store to point to a framed picture of herself and Y/N, signed and all. 

“She has a boyfriend?” Penelope asked, shocked that she hadn’t at least figured it out. In all her snooping of Y/N’s instagram, she hadn’t seen a hint of a boyfriend. 

“Oh, yes. They’ve been coming around for, goodness, six months now? They always buy each other books, it’s so adorable. He always buys her one of the classics, I think it was Romeo and Juliet last time. She usually gets a romance of some kind.” That made sense; the most recent picture on her instagram was one of two books; Romeo and Juliet, and The Duke and I. Eventually, Penelope and Derek made their way out of the bookstore, and that was the end of Penelope’s investigation of Y/N Y/L/N’s life.

Well, the end of Penelope’s investigation for that week.

It’s not like Penelope could track down Y/N Y/L/N’s secret boyfriend…not without seriously abusing her FBI database and maybe breaking a few privacy laws. She almost forgot about the trip to the bookstore, but during a rare case where she actually got to join the team on the jet, she noticed Spencer was reading something out of character. 

“Uh, Reid?” He looked up from the book he was reading.

“What’s up?” He said, quietly, as everyone else was sleeping after the long case.

“Why are you reading The Duke and I? I thought you were a total book snob?” She asked, sitting across from him.

“Oh, um,” Nothing could hide the slight blush that appeared on his face. “A friend of mine told me to read it.”

“Like a girlfriend?” Penelope teased, watching as his blush became even more noticeable.

“Y-yeah. Uh. Like a girlfriend.” Spencer opened the book back up, hiding behind its cover and promptly ending the conversation. He brought his feet up onto the small table in between them, causing his pants to ride up just enough to show off his socks. One sock was just plain black, but the other one was covered in the logo for a familiar TV show.

“Are you a fan of Y/N Y/L/N too?” Spencer just looked up in confusion.

“What?”

“Your sock, that’s her show right? It’s really good, I watched it in like a day.”

Spencer’s eyes went back to the book. “Uh, yeah. It’s a great show.”

Sure, Penelope thought he was acting a little weird, but that’s just Spencer. He doesn’t talk about his life outside of work too often, but she was glad he at least told her about the girlfriend. Even if he wouldn’t tell her her name, she was sure she could figure something out. So the next day, she updated Derek on her new information about Spencer.

“Wait wait wait, Spencer was wearing socks with the show’s logo? And reading The Duke and I?” The two of them had been walking towards the BAU kitchen to get a cup of coffee to help them get through the paperwork day, but Derek had stopped walking abruptly when Penelope gave him those details.

“That’s what you’re most interested in? Not the fact that Spencer has a girlfriend?” Penelope asked.

“C’mon baby girl, it’s obvious that Spencer’s been dating someone.”

“What! You knew! And you didn’t tell me?”

Derek laughed, resuming their walk towards coffee and letting Penelope hurry along behind him. “Sorry cupcake, I figured you knew too. He’s just been so happy for the past few months, in the way only a lady would make him.”

“Ugh, ok, well some of us aren’t profilers, Derek. What’s so important about the socks and book?” 

“Well,” Derek grabbed the coffee pot, pouring some into Penelope’s mug as he spoke. “Just a few weeks ago you dragged me to a bookstore, where we learned about a certain couple. A couple where the guy likes classics and the girl likes romance, right?”

“Yeah-Oh! No! There’s no way you’re suggesting what I think you’re suggesting.”

“And didn’t Spencer get flustered when you mentioned her?” He asked, now pouring the coffee into his own mug.

“Oh my god! The socks!” Penelope pulled her phone out of the pocket, quickly making her way to the picture she’d saved. She showed it to Derek once again, this time zooming in on the coffee table. “Those are the socks he was wearing! On her instagram!”

“Uh, why are you staring at a picture of Spencer’s living room?” Penelope jumped, not having noticed that JJ was standing over her shoulder, looking at the picture on Penelope’s phone.

“Wait, you’re sure this is his living room? Like, 100%?” Penelope had never actually been to his place before.

“Uh, yeah, he babysits Henry a lot. Why, what’s the big deal about it?”

“Oh my god, Spencer is dating a movie star. Spencer Reid is dating a movie star!” Penelope couldn’t help but jump up and down, almost spilling her coffee.

And then Spencer walked into the room, promptly ending the gossip between coworkers before Spencer could hear. 

Derek had made her promise to wait until Spencer was ready to talk about his relationship, but after an agonizing week, she felt like she was going to burst at the seams. So when she got a notification on their night off that Y/N had posted a new picture, she was aching to get more information about the secret relationship. This was, again, a picture in what she now knows is Spencer’s living room. This time, there was an open box of pizza on the table. It was captioned, “Lovely night in.”

So, naturally, Penelope immediately headed to Spencer’s.

~~~

Y/N doesn’t think it’s possible to be any more happy than she is right now.

8 months ago she’d just ended what was possibly the most disastrous relationship in the history of humankind. She’d made the classic mistake of dating a co-star; an older guy who was well known to be a bit of a playboy. The relationship had been extremely public; everything from their dates to their fights were somehow captured by paparazzi. His fans hated her, her fans hated him, and worst of all, the network was pushing them to be even more public in the hopes of gaining more viewers. At the end of it all, she was insanely grateful her character wouldn’t be returning for the next season as she was already booked for a movie. The only thing worse than breaking up with your co-star is having to continue playing his love interest. 

And just when she was at her absolute lowest, having sworn off of ever dating someone in the spotlight again, she ran into Spencer. 

After wrapping filming for a movie in Atlanta, the only reason she was even in D.C. was because her flight was forced to land early; a sudden storm was arriving and there was no way the plane would safely make it to New York. What started as an hour delay turned to three, then four, and before she knew it Y/N was stuck in town for a weekend. 

She spent basically an entire day hiding away in her hotel room, so Y/N just had to get out and do something. It was still raining cats and dogs, and she’d never been in the city before, so she just googled the closest places that were still open. Luckily, there was a small bookstore just down the street, and there were a few books she’d heard about that she hadn’t had the chance to buy yet. So she put on her coat and practically ran to the store. 

She was drenched and already regretting the decision to leave the hotel room by the time she walked into the building, but there was no point in turning back now. The place was practically empty anyways, Y/N only spotted an older woman reading a novel at the cash register. She slowly began browsing the shelves, not looking for anything in particular.

When she rounded one of the corners, however, she ran right into someone’s chest.

“Shit! I’m so sorry!” She immediately apologized, looking up to find a cute man staring back at her. “I wasn’t paying any attention, I assumed I was the only one in here.”

“That’s alright, I, um, I wasn’t paying attention either.”

The guy standing before her was holding various books, all reminding Y/N of the books she was supposed to read (but never actually read) for her high school English classes. “So, do you exclusively read books written before the 20th century or are you just taking a college class in-” She read the title of the book on top of his pile; a collection of short stories by Edgar Allen Poe. “-depressing gothic short stories?”

He laughed, rolling his eyes a bit. “I just like a bit of a challenge when reading. And it’s a rainy day, which calls for ‘depressing gothic short stories,’ not–” He glanced at the one book she’d picked up, a cartoon covered book called Red, White, and Royal Blue. “What I can only assume is a cheesy romance.”

Despite his insult of her choice in books, Y/N couldn’t help the smile on her face. “Well maybe I like reading books that are actually entertaining, not reading so I can be confused by convoluted metaphors.” 

Just as he opened his mouth to respond, their conversation was disrupted. “Y/N Y/L/N? Aren’t you from that doctor show on television?” Y/N turned to see the woman that had been at the register earlier slowly walking over. 

“That’s me! It’s nice to meet you!” Y/N’s real smile suddenly switched to a smaller, more practiced one. It’s not that she didn’t love meeting fans–she’d just been enjoying a conversation with someone who wasn’t treating her differently. 

“Oh I knew I recognized you! My granddaughter loves her show, she was so upset when you decided to transfer to that fancy british hospital and…” The woman started rambling on a bit about the stuff her character had done and how her granddaughter reacted to it. Y/N glanced over at the guy she’d been talking to, who seemed entertained by the whole interaction. “...Anyways, do you think we could take a picture? My granddaughter will just never believe you were here!”

“Of course, um, do you mind taking it for us…?”

“Spencer. Yeah, I’ll take the picture for you. Do you have a camera, Mrs. Waverly?” Clearly the guy, Spencer, was a bit of a regular here if he knew her by name. 

“Yes, yes, it’s around here somewhere…” The woman scrambled off, muttering to herself about where she’d last seen the camera.

“So…” Spencer spoke first, breaking the somewhat awkward silence while they waited for Mrs. Waverly. “You read cheesy romances and star in cheesy Grey’s Anatomy knockoffs?”

“Hey! It wasn’t a Grey’s-” His pointed look made her stop. “Ok, it was totally a Grey’s Anatomy knockoff, but I’m not on the show anymore so you can’t make fun of me for it!”

Mrs. Waverly finally reappeared, with an old polaroid camera in her hands. The two quickly took a picture, which Y/N happily signed for the woman. By the time both Y/N and Spencer had bought their books, the rain had slowed to a light drizzle. 

“So, um…” Spencer started, but trailed off, not knowing what to say.

“My hotel is just down the street.” Y/N said, pointing in the right direction. Spencer’s eyes widened a bit before Y/N realized what she’d said. “Not that I’m like, inviting you to my hotel room, I’m not, that’d be crazy, I just-” She cut herself off, trying to not ramble anymore. “Do you wanna walk with me? Tell me more about your depressing book?”

Luckily, Spencer wasn’t put off by her rambling. “I’d love to. Poe isn’t always depressing, really…” He started, as the two of you walked slowly towards your hotel.

From there, the short walk turned into a coffee date the next day, which turned into long FaceTimes while one or both of you were in different cities, which lead to where you are now; 8 months deep in a relationship and finally in town with Spencer. He’d still have work of course, but you’d be in town for the next two months as your next job wasn’t starting for a while. 

The two of you were basically in an extended honeymoon phase. Only your closest friends knew that you were dating anyone, so you never had to worry about it leaking to the press. You figured when the two of you got more serious you’d eventually have to go public with the relationship, but for now it was nice having something just for you. 

You were in Spencer’s apartment, scrolling through Netflix looking for something new to watch, when Spencer arrived home from work.

“I think my team knows that we’re dating.” 

“What?”

Spencer made his way to the couch, laying down next to Y/N as he continued, “Well obviously JJ knows, but she said she wouldn’t tell anyone. I’m sure Hotch and Rossi at least have figured out that I’m dating someone, but I don’t think they care enough to figure out who. But today Garcia and Morgan were just acting weird. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if-”

Spencer was cut off by a knock at the door. “Spencer Reid if you don’t open this door right now I’m making Derek kick it down!” 

“Let me guess…that’s Garcia.” Y/N said, laughing as Spencer rolled his eyes and got up to open the door. 

“Spencer, are you actually dating a movie star? And you didn’t tell me?” Garcia complained, not yet seeing Y/N sitting on the couch as she entered the room, solely focused on Spencer. Derek walked in next, immediately noticing Y/N and smiling at her. Y/N made her way over, trying not to laugh at Garcia’s widening eyes when she noticed her. 

“Sorry, I think it’s my fault that he didn’t tell you. We’re just keeping things quiet right now.” You explained, “I’m Y/N, by the way.” 

Derek was the first to grab your hand. “Derek Morgan. I’m sorry about all this, she was just curious.”

“I’m Penelope! And you’re Y/N and I love your work so much you don’t even know!” Penelope began rambling, taking Y/N’s arm in hers and leading her over to the couch as she talked about her favorite parts of Y/N’s movie. Derek and Spencer slowly followed, talking amongst themselves.

“So…Spencer Reid and Y/N Y/L/N. How’d that happen?” Derek asked. 

Spencer smiled, thinking back to that night 8 months ago. “We met in a bookstore last year.”

Derek laughed, because of course Reid would meet a girl at a bookstore. “You happy?”

Again, he smiled. “I’ve never been happier.”

~~~

taglist

~~~ A Very Long Time Ago ~~~

Raven really didn’t want to do this. She was hiding behind some bushes, watching Liam and Killian make the journey up to dead man’s peak, searching for the deadly dreamshade. She knew she had to convince them not to take the plant back to the Enchanted Forest, but confronting the two of them would mean admitting some of her deepest secrets. Killian, assuming he hasn’t grown out of his inquisitive nature, would have hundreds of questions. But Liam...she knew for a fact what he’d ask. “Why did you leave me Talia? Did I mean nothing to you?” She could practically hear him say it, with his ocean blue eyes filled with pain. Liam had meant so much to her, and she to him...Raven would never admit it to anyone, but in a better world, she would’ve happily married him.

Raven watched as they got closer and closer to the dreamshade, the brothers talking about their encounter with Pan. She took a deep breath, then appeared in front of Liam, blocking the path. Liam had his sword in front of him, using it to clear away any plants in their way. When he spotted her, he didn’t lower it.

“What do you want?” He asked, his voice laced in anger. Ouch. Killian took a much kinder approach.

“Is it really you, Talia? How can this be?” Raven had to resist letting a smile overcome her face. He was still so kind, after all this time.

“It’s Raven now. I, uh, I took a new name. When I left the ship.” She took a deep breath, gathering more courage before continuing, “It really is me, though. No one ages on Neverland...I had no idea it had been so long until I recognized you.” Liam finally yielded, putting his sword away, but his hardened face showed no emotion at Raven’s explanation.

“Tal -” Killian stopped himself, before continuing without the use of her name, “We thought you were dead...we thought you’d - How did you even get here? Why did you never come back? Why'd you leave?” There it was, all the questions that Raven did not want to answer. Instead, she changed the topic to what she had really come for.

“It doesn’t matter. I came to tell you that you can’t take the dreamshade back to the Enchanted Forest. It’s too dangerous.” Her comment only made Liam scoff.

“Nice try Raven ,” He said, mocking the name, “But your suitor already tried. And I don’t mean to offend, but I’d rather believe my king than a traitor like yourself.”

Raven tried not to let his comment affect her, instead trying again to persuade him. “Look, you don’t need to forgive me. After today, you never need to see me again. Just trust me one last time-”

“Trust you? You abandoned us! How can I trust you? You know-” He paused for a moment, taking a menacing step towards Raven, “I wish you had walked off the plank like we thought for all those years. At least then I could remember you as a friend, instead of knowing the truth of your bad form.”

Killian’s eyes widened at his comment, and at the fury that was appearing in Raven’s eyes. He took a step back from the pair, sensing the argument would only get more heated.

Raven began yelling this time. “Bad form? The only bad form here is trying to win a war for a ruthless, idiotic king by cheating! You have absolutely no idea what I was going through on that ship-”

Liam cut her off once more, yelling even louder than she, “Yes I do! I know exactly what you were going through because you were my best friend! I told you everything and you did the same! I thought we had a future, but you - Did you even care for me at all?   Did you not think for one moment how you leaving would affect me?

“You know what,” Raven began walking away from the brothers as she spoke, “Go ahead! Kill everyone with the dreamshade. Kill the other army, kill your own army, kill yourselves with it! May the last thing you think of when the poison takes over your heart be regret. You can die thinking about how the traitor Talia was right! ” With her final words, she disappeared from their sight, heading back to camp.

~~~ Present Day ~~~

“How are you holding up, mate?” Hook asked David, who was very obviously struggling as they walked.

“Just fine. Perfect. Why would anything be wrong.” David replied, glancing back at Raven as he tried to appear in perfect health.

“Yeah, you don’t need to fake it. I know you’ve been poisoned by dreamshade.” Raven said, making David stop walking and look at Hook with anger.

“You told her?!”

“He didn’t have to, mate. It’s obvious to anyone familiar with the side effects.” Despite Raven’s assurance that Hook hadn’t broken what little trust David had put in him, the prince felt no need to apologize, instead answering Hook’s original question.

“Don't worry about me. Just worry about getting us to the sextant.”

“As entertaining as that was, I wasn’t talking about the poison. I meant the good-byes. Looked a bit stormy back there.” David began walking again, letting the other two follow behind him.

“I did what had to be done, and I did it out of love. Emma and Mary Margaret will understand that.” He explained, before stopping once more at a nearby tree.

“I hate to break it to you, but-” Raven started, before Hook cut her off.

“You’re gonna tell them that from beyond the grave.” He said, earning a glare from the girl.

David looked at the two of them once more before correcting, “No. You are. You two are gonna tell them that I died a hero, fighting for their way home. What you're not gonna tell them is that I left already a dead man.”

“You don’t think your family deserves the truth?” Raven asked.

“What do you know of family?” Hook muttered, although he made no effort to hide the comment from Raven. In return, Raven hit his arm as hard as she could.

David, ignoring the childish exchange, answered Raven’s question. “Their last memories of me won't be of a liar.”

“Why should I help you?” Hook asked. Raven was surprised at his question, considering the whole point of this journey was to save David’s life.

David chuckled at the question before answering, “Well, if you didn't steal that bean, they wouldn't have had a chance to take Henry, we wouldn't be on this island, and I wouldn't be dying of dreamshade.”

“Nice going, Hook.” Raven muttered. This time, Hook hit her arm.

“Fair point.” He replied to David, “At least you got to say good-bye. Most people don't get that much.” David paused for a moment, before looking back at Hook. Hook kept walking, taking the lead before David spoke again.

“You lost someone, didn't you?” Hook glanced at Raven for just a single moment before ignoring David’s question. If David noticed the exchange, he didn’t say anything.

“This is where we ascend. I'll climb ahead and throw down the rope.” Raven looked up at the peak, remembering the horrible day she had been there with Hook and Liam. David and Hook kept arguing as Hook began to climb up, but she didn’t pay much attention. She wished more than anything she could go back, make her last words to Liam anything other than what she had said.

~~~ A Very Long Time Ago ~~~

When Raven returned to the Lost Boy’s Camp, she was fuming. Their numbers were few, as Pan had only recently begun recruiting people to permanently stay on the island, so there was plenty of room for the Lost Boys to stay the hell away from Raven as she stormed about. She was muttering to herself, complaining about how “Liam think’s he’s all that,” and “Of course he became a fucking Captain,” and how, “He’s just some king’s little bitch.”  

When Pan noticed his Raven’s mood, he turned to Felix for answers.

“I think she talked to the adults that showed up earlier.” Was the only answer Felix had for him.

“Well I knew that much, you idiot-”

“I can hear you two!” Raven snapped, cutting off Pan. Pan winced, turning around to see Raven staring right at them. He sent Felix off with a look, before walking over towards the girl.

“So..care to explain?” He asked, sitting next to Raven on a log.

“They’re idiotic adults who are going to end up killing their entire country-”

“Not that, Raven. Clearly you know them.”

Raven sighed, looking down at her hands before telling the truth. “We lived on that ship together. They were my friends. Now they’re idiotic adults who would rather trust some dumb king than their oldest friend.”

“You lived on the- you said there weren’t any boys on the ship!” Pan exclaimed, remembering the first night he met Raven. When she glared at him, he conceded. “But that’s not important now….you tried your best to tell them the truth. It’s up to them now.”

“I just want them off the island. As soon as possible.” This made Pan grin. Sounds like a good game, and Pan loves a game.

“Now that, I can do for you.”

~~~ Present Day ~~~

Raven and David watched as Hook climbed up the mountain. The plan was for Hook to climb up and throw a rope down so David could make it up the mountain. Raven’s job was just to make sure he stays alive until then. Hook had wanted Raven to just “poof” them up to the top, as he put it, but Raven insisted that it would be better to avoid any magic, as Pan can trace it easily.

Hook was nearly all the way up the mountain before David made any attempt at conversation.

“So...how long have you known Hook?” He asked, making Raven look away from the climbing pirate.

“Uhhh.. I’m not sure.” Raven answered honestly, “I’ve probably been on this island for hundreds of years.”

“Well sure..it’s just that you two seem close.”

“Close?!” Raven repeated, unsure if she’d heard David right. “Hook and I are nowhere near friends, I’m not sure where you got that idea, mate.”

“I don’t mean that you’re friends, I just mean that you argue more like you’re siblings than enemies.” David’s observation made Raven go quiet. “C’mon, I’m a dying man. And I’m curious.”

Raven scoffed at David’s attempt to get her to tell the truth, but decided to tell him anyway. “Hook and I knew each other before either of us came to Neverland.”

“What, like, when you were kids?”

“I’m still a kid, thank you very-” Raven suddenly sensed the presence of Pan, making her stop talking. She looked around the forest, before realizing that Pan was at the top of the mountain with Hook.

“What is it?” David asked, sensing her concern.

“Pan’s up there.”

“How do you know? Is Hook ok?” David asked.

“I just know, ok. And I’m not sure about Hook...but he hasn’t thrown the rope down. Think you can climb without it?” Raven asked, but before she even finished the question, David was slowly beginning to climb. “Guess that’s a yes…” She mumbled, before pulling her hands on the rocks and pulling herself up.

~~~

“So you weren’t speaking metaphorically about the grave then?” Emma said. The six of them had made their way to a cliff high above the mermaid lagoon. At the very edge was a large rock, with the name “RAVEN” carved in messily. Just beneath her name were multiple rows of tally marks.

“Nope. After...everything with Pan, I ran away. Pan and the lost boys wouldn’t stop looking for me, so I needed to do something to get them off my back.”

“So you faked your own death?” Snow said, shock evident in your voice.

“I did what I had to do to survive. Pan thinks I’m dead, lost boys stop looking for me, I can hide until I figure out a way off the island.” Raven explained. 

“And Pan bought it? It was that simple?” Hook questioned. Unlike the others, he knew part of Raven’s history with Pan, so it was understandable why he was so hesitant to believe Pan would back down so easily.

“Well, I used a little magic, made it more believable. Besides, the point isn’t how I pulled it off. The point is I must’ve fucked up pretty bad in order to resort to faking my own death. And, I’ve been able to avoid getting caught in my lie for,” Raven looked back at the grave, pointing at the tally marks, “That many years.”

“Isn’t marking the years on your own gravestone a bit of a giveaway?” Regina walked towards the stone, tracing her fingers over the carvings. Raven assumed she was using magic to make sure the grave wasn’t a fake, and that it had indeed been sitting there for years.

“It would be. If I was the one who added the marks.” Raven paused before giving an explanation, “Some of the lost boys, the ones who still care about me, they come around every year or so and add a tally. It’s hard to keep track of the years in Neverland, so it’s probably off by a few years.”

“How long have you been here?” Emma asked. From the look on her face, Raven could tell how worried she was. If Raven had been stuck for so long, how long would it take for them to get Henry back?

“I have absolutely no idea. You don’t age on Neverland, plus time works so differently here. Two weeks here could be just a night back in the Enchanted Forest. That’s why it’s so hard to keep track.”

“Aye, the lass is right. I couldn’t tell you how many years my crew and I were stuck on the Roger here in Neverland.” Hook confirmed. This was now the second time in one day Hook had agreed with her on anything - An event that probably hadn’t been achieved since they were children. 

“Anyways. Clearly I’m not lying, so will you let me help you save the bo-” Emma’s glare cut Raven off, so she quickly corrected herself, “Henry. Let me pay back my debt to Bae?” The team of so-called-heroes all glanced at each other, no one wanting to be the first to admit that they needed Raven’s help. Unsurprisingly, Snow was the one to take the leap of faith.

“Of course. Help us find Henry, and we’ll take you back to Storybrooke with us.” Snow had a large smile on her face as she said the words, but only received a hint of a smile in return from Raven.

“Do you have any plans then? Or are you as useless as Hook?” Regina snapped, annoyed as always at any pleasantness from Snow.

“You guys got any rope?”

~~~ A Very Long Time Ago ~~~

“What the hell are you doing?” Raven yelled across the beach. Pan was at the shoreline, staring out at the ocean. When he heard Raven’s voice, he turned and smiled, waving her over. Raven prepared to run across the hot sand, but paused, remembering the tricks Pan had begun to teach her. With only a moment's hesitation, she reached for the magic within her. Not a second later, she landed with a slight stumble next to Pan.

“Not terrible. For a girl, anyways.” Pan joked, not even flinching at her sudden appearance next to him.

“Shut up. What are we staring at the ocean for?” Raven asked, only seeing the calm sea ahead of them.

“Look up.” At Pan’s direction, she looked to the sky and, to her surprise, saw a ship flying down from the stars. It clearly belonged to some kind of Navy back in the Enchanted Forest, save for the large, feathery sail. 

“Interesting.” Raven said, taking a step closer to the ocean as the boat landed safely in the waters.

“Very.” Pan’s arm landed on her shoulder, causing Raven to look up at the boy. He was already looking down at her with a smirk ghosting his face. “Let’s see what kind of trouble we’ll be getting into today.”

~~~ Present Day ~~~

“A trap? That’s your plan?” Regina said, judgment evident in her voice. 

“The lost boys want to come after us, we need to go after them. It’s a good plan.” Snow replied as she diligently worked to make the net. 

“Glad to see someone appreciates it.” Raven mumbled, as she tied together her own piece of the net.

“Why not simply use magic to trap a lost boy? Or use magic to make the net, at least?” Regina said, glaring at Raven as she did so. 

“Well, Your Majesty, in case you haven’t noticed, Pan is extremely powerful. If we used magic to even make the net, let alone to actually trap a boy, he’d be able to detect it. And correct me if I’m wrong, but we’re actually trying to avoid that, right?” Raven said, meeting Regina’s glare with just as much ferocity.

“You really think a lost boy is gonna betray Pan?” Hook asked, taking another sip from his flask.

“I did.” Raven answered, looking back to her rope and away from Regina.

“David?” Snow ignored the bickering between everyone, addressing her husband with a softness not normally found in Neverland, “We need more vine.”

“On it.” He answered calmly, before addressing Hook with more anger than Raven thought he was actually capable of, “You’re coming with me pirate.”

Raven smirked as Hook sulked off after him, and continued to diligently work on tying the rope they had left.

~~~ A Very Long Time Ago ~~~

“Are you two lost?” Pan asked, causing the two men who had landed on their shore to turn towards him, drawing their weapons. 

“Men.” Raven thought, rolling her eyes as she appeared behind them, without their knowledge of her presence.

“You look lost to me.” Pan said, smirking at both the men’s weapons and Raven’s appearance behind them. She could tell he was proud that she’d landed without a stumble this time, even if he’d never admit it. 

“Identify yourself, boy.” One of them asked, not taking his eyes off Pan. Raven felt a sense of familiarity at his voice, but she couldn’t place it. 

“I’m Peter Pan. I live here...Who are you?” Pan asked, without an ounce of respect that Raven was sure the soldiers would’ve been accustomed to. 

After deciding that Pan wasn’t a threat (A rather stupid decision, that Raven was sure the man would regret), He put his sword away, causing the other man to follow. “Captain Jones. And my Lieutenant. We’re here by order of the King.”

This caused Pan to raise his brows, and glance at Raven as subtly as he could. Even though she couldn't read his mind, he knew his thoughts were somewhere between disbelief and making fun of the soldiers. 

“The King huh?” Pan chuckled a little, before answering seriously, “We don’t have any kings in Neverland. Just me.”

“You mean I’m not the Queen of Neverland?” Raven took this moment as her chance to join the fun, causing the two men to once again draw their swords. They both had a look of shock on their faces, and neither seemed like they would actually harm her. Raven disappeared once more, and landed herself at Pan’s side this time before speaking again. “How disappointing.”

The men turned once more, but their swords were at their sides instead of in position to fight. “Impossible…” The Captain mumbled, staring at Raven with a look she wasn’t fond of. Now that she was looking at their faces, the pair did seem somewhat familiar. But it wasn’t until the Lieutenant spoke that she placed them. 

“Talia?” He asked, putting his sword away completely this time. He took a step forward, but both Raven and Pan took one back, with Pan’s arm now protectively pushing her behind him. Raven couldn’t address them, she couldn’t even look at them anymore. Has she really been on Neverland for so long? Long enough for her friends to grow up and become the leaders of their own ship?

“Get rid of them.” She said, looking only at Peter. He turned to look towards her, silently asking if she was alright. “Your Queen is bored.” She attempted to joke, but knew Pan would see right through it. So she simply used her magic to transport herself back to camp, where she would hopefully never have to look at her old friends again.

~~~

When Pan arrived back at the small camp, Raven immediately began questioning him about the encounter with Killian and Liam.

“What happened? Why are they here? Did they ask about me? Do they-” 

“Slow down, love, I only just got back.” Pan joked, chuckling a bit before he noticed the serious look on Raven’s face. He cleared his throat before speaking again. “They did ask about you, but I didn’t answer any of their questions. Figured that you could answer them yourself if you wanted to see them. As for why they’re here, well, turns out they work for a pretty ruthless King.”

“What do you mean?” Raven asked, stepping closer to Pan as a few lost boys walked past the two of them, not wanting them to overhear or interrupt the conversation. 

“Well, their king sent them after the dreamshade. Only he told them it was a medicine, not poison. So either this king is a complete idiot, or he’s merciless.” Pan said, before Felix came up to them to report to Pan about something. Most likely the damned heart he’d been searching for.

Raven’s thoughts were moving faster than the best ship in the realms, but she knew that she’d have to confront Liam and Killian about dreamshade. She hadn’t seen them in at least a decade, sure, but she knew Liam and Killian like the back of her hand. They’d never willingly bring a weapon so dangerous back to the Enchanted Forest, which meant they must be in the dark. They hadn’t believed Pan’s warning, but maybe they’d believe a childhood friend.

~~~ Present Day ~~~

“A sextant? And you’re telling us about this now?” Emma asked, shocked that Hook would keep something so important from them.

“How do we know you’re not lying?” Regina asked. Back when they were kids, Hook could barely tell a lie, but years of being a pirate had made him annoyingly hard to read.

“Oh, you don’t. But I’m not.” Raven scoffed at his answer, but no one took notice. Or, they simply all chose to ignore it. “This is the best hope yet we’ve had of an exit plan, and don’t forget we’re gonna need one.” He said, looking at the three women as David stood behind him, gathering supplies. Raven’s attention wasn’t on Hook, but instead David. 

He looked...off. Sure, she’d noticed that he didn’t seem entirely right the second she’d laid eyes on him, but it had only gotten worse. If Raven didn’t know any better, she’d say that he was suffering from a low dosage of dreamshade poison. The slight limp he had with every step, his heavier breathing, the ever-present sweat on his forehead...it all added up. But surely he’d have told his family, right? Said his goodbyes? Why was he trying so hard to act like everything was fine?

Raven didn’t pay attention to anything else Hook said, until David spoke up. “Hook’s right.”

“You wanna split up?” Snow asked, clearly shocked that David was willing to go along with any plan that involved him and Hook together. 

“It’s the last thing I wanna do, but if there’s a chance it can get us home….”

“I’ll come with you two.” Raven announced standing up from her seat on a tree stump and gathering her own supplies. Hook and David glanced at each other briefly, confirming Raven’s guess that there was something more to this trip. “Trust me, if you’re going to be capturing a lost boy, you don’t want me anywhere near. You want him focused on Henry, not his old friend that’s suddenly no-so-dead anymore.” Raven reasoned. The rest of the team seemed to accept the answer, although Hook still looked unconvinced. “Unless there’s some reason I should stay. Hook?” Raven asked, with a smirk on her face. She wanted him to know she was onto him.

“Course not. More the merrier.” Hook said, with a sarcastic smile. He turned and began walking away, and Raven followed, leaving David behind to say goodbyes to his family. Once they were a good distance away, Raven spoke.

“It’s dreamshade, isn’t it?” 

“I haven’t the faintest idea what you’re talking about.” Hook said, looking away from her.

“Please. You and I both know the effects of dreamshade far too well. So what are we gonna do about it?” Hook looked at Raven this time, with an unreadable look on his face. 

“What?”

“I’m surprised you want to do anything to help him.”

She scoffed, “Says the pirate.” Hook gave her a soft chuckle in return, before turning fully to face her.

“I told him the sextant is atop dead man’s peak.” He explained, allowing her to connect the dots.

“Oh. Oh. There’s not actually a-” 

“You two done gossiping, or can we get a move on?” David’s voice interrupted your hushed conversation, but the message Hook was trying to make had gotten across. This was a rescue mission for David, whether he knew it or not.

You and Spencer couldn’t be more different.

Well, that’s not entirely true. You’re the same age, live in the same city. You both like reading and sci-fi. You both listen to a lot of music and love your jobs.

Of course, you can’t agree on any of those things. He reads classic novels in their original languages, and you read cheesy romance books. He likes Star Trek, you like Star Wars. He listens to classical music, and you listen to rock. He’s an FBI agent with multiple doctorates, and you’re a part time bartender/part time lead singer of a not-so-famous band who barely graduated high school. By all accounts, you two shouldn’t work. But somehow, despite all your differences, you’ve been dating for nearly a year now. 

Your relationship really couldn’t be stronger; you live together, you’ve met his mother, he’s met your parents- but there was still one line the two of you hadn’t crossed. Meeting his coworkers. You know that he’s told them he’s dating someone, after all, they’re profilers. They could tell he was with someone after your first date. But for some reason, Spencer was still hesitant to introduce them to you. You tried not to let your insecurities cloud your thoughts, but well, how could you not? Was he embarrassed by you? Did he think they’d judge you for your lack of education and career? Would he break up with you if they didn’t approve?

You’d brought up meeting his coworkers on multiple occasions, of course, but he always had a reason to put it off. 

“We’re all so busy, we’d probably get called off to a case before they even get to know you.” 

“They’re just gonna profile you, Y/N, trust me, you don’t want that.”

“It’s a team bonding thing, I don’t want you to feel left out. Next time?”

So, when you found out the entire BAU was getting a week off after almost non-stop cases for the past two months, you knew this was your chance. You didn’t care if they were going to judge you, or profile you, you wanted to get to know the people closest to Spencer. So, when Spencer came home that night, he was met with you, holding a flyer for your band’s next gig.

~~~

“What’s this?” He asked, taking off his bag and putting it on the ground next to the door. Normally, you’d scold him for that - “There’s a perfectly good hook right there, Spencer.” - but you let it slide this time. 

“Band’s doing a gig at the bar on Friday. And you have this week off, which means you get to come!” You handed him the flyer, and planted a kiss on his cheek as he answered.

“Of course, you know I never miss your-”

“And so can the rest of the BAU!” You cut him off with a sweet, and convincing smile on your face. 

“Honey…” He started, but you wouldn’t let him talk you out of it this time.

“C’mon Spence! We’ve been together for almost a year now! I want to get to know these people, they’re basically your family! What’s the harm in having them come to the bar?” You paused for a moment, taking a deep breath before your next words, “Do you really think they’ll hate me so much?”

“What?” Spencer was shocked you would even suggest that the BAU wouldn’t like you - how could they not love you? “No! They’ll love you!”

“Then why won’t you let me meet them?”

Now it was Spencer’s turn to share his insecurities. “W- I just...you and I are so different,” He started, before you scoffed.

“Yeah, no shit, Spence. Unless you have secret nipple piercings too.” You said sarcastically, enjoying the redness that covered Spencer’s cheeks at the mention of your piercings. 

“Anyways...you and I are really different, and they’ll point it out. And make fun of me. And..and probably make you realize that you could do better than nerdy old me.” Spencer let out a breath at his confession, feeling a weight leave his chest that he’d been carrying for months. 

“Are you insane? Spence, if anyone can do better it’s you!” Spencer opened his mouth to protest, but you kept talking, “I mean really Spencer, you’re a badass FBI agent! You’re a doctor! You’re a genius! Any girl would kill to have a guy like-” Spencer cut you off with an intense kiss. When he finally pulled away, just for a moment, he spoke quietly.

“So Friday, huh? You really wanna meet them?”

“Yes, you idiot. I really wanna meet them.”

~~~

When Friday came rolling around, you were both extremely excited and nervous. On one hand, you were meeting the BAU, who are practically Spencer’s family, and you knew their opinion of you could make or break your relationship. But, you’d written a song this week that you had yet to show Spencer, and you couldn’t wait for him to hear it at the gig. Again, you were nervous for him and the team to hear the song, but part of being a musician is being vulnerable.

You’d been rehearsing the song with your band all week - they were a little mad that you’d wanted to add a brand new song so last minute, but they all agreed it was good enough that it had to be on the setlist - so you hadn’t gotten to spend as much of Spencer’s week off with him as you’d have liked. Hopefully when he heard the song tonight, he’d forgive you for it. 

“Why can’t I go to your sound check again?” He asked you for the fifth time that day, as you were getting ready for your gig. Normally, you’d love to have Spencer at sound check, and he much preferred watching you perform when there wasn’t an obnoxious crowd surrounding him.

“I told you, I have a surprise for you during the show, and if you come to sound check-”

“It’ll be ruined, I know. I was just hoping you’d change your mind.” He pouted, making you almost regret saying no to him. Almost.

“Trust me babe, it’ll be worth it. Go to dinner with the team, and I’ll meet you all at the bar at 8.”

“Are you sure you want to meet them?”

“Yes, genius, I’m sure. 8 o’clock.”

“Okay, 8 o’clock.”

~~~

When you walked onto the small stage with the band, you could immediately spot Spencer and the BAU in the crowd. There was a decent turn out, but Spencer stood out like a sore thumb. At least, he always stood out to you. You gave him a smile and wink, before standing in front of the mic to introduce the band. 

The set started like normal, playing the songs Spencer knew by heart (of course, he only needed to hear the songs once to know them by heart, but it still made your heart soar when you saw him singing the lyrics in the crowd). You noticed the other members of the BAU enjoying the songs as well, which settled your nerves greatly. You saw who you could only assume to be Garcia and Morgan dancing provocatively together, the two other women - probably Prentiss and JJ - dancing modestly together, pausing to talk every now and then. You recognized Rossi from the back cover of his books, enjoying the music with a scotch and a slight bobbing of his head to the beat. The last person, from the process of elimination, Hotch, didn’t appear to be enjoying himself at first glance - but you could see a hint of a smile on his face as he lightly swayed to the music. 

When you got to the final song in your set, you were looking right at Spencer as you introduced the song. “So, this next song is gonna be the last of the night -” A roar of upset came from the crowd, causing you to laugh as you wiped the sweat from your forehead. “I know, I know, I’m not happy about it either guys. But, it is a brand new song, and the inspiration for it is right here in the room.” The crowd grew in excitement this time, looking around at each other as if they could figure out who the mystery muse was. Spencer already felt a blush growing on his cheeks as he realized what your surprise was going to be. “This song is called Doctor Agent Super Genius!” You said with a large smile on your face, as the guitarist began playing the beginning chords. 

Spencer’s blush was even more obvious now, especially since all his coworkers had looked away from the stage and towards him. He only shrugged in response, trying to show that he knew nothing about it. Before any of them could question him, you began to sing.

Most girls go for tall, dark, and handsome

But that’s not how I’d describe you

You’re a little scrawny,

Your hair is kinda funny,

And you’ve got enough brains for two

The music began to build, and you were looking right at Spencer as you sang.

You talk my ear off about random facts

That I don’t give a shit about, but, 

I’ll smile and nod

As you go on and on

Cause I want you to take me out

You laughed a little, then began playing your own guitar along with the lead guitarist before the chorus hit.

You see he’s got 

1 2 3!

PHDs, and he knows exactly what I’m thinkin’ just by lookin’ at me

He knows everything about everything

Especially what to do in between the sheets, hey!

As you played your guitar and did your best to interact with the crowd before the next verse hit, Spencer’s blush had hit an all time high. The team, clearly enjoying the suggestive lyrics and the way Spencer had reacted to them, were now all dancing. Well, except Hotch. He was just laughing at Spencer along with the team.

You claim that you don’t have luck with girls

But I don’t see how that’s true

Cause those ladies are insane if they don’t want an agent

Who’s as fucking cute as you

Yeah, you talk my ear off about random facts

That I don’t give a shit about, but

I’ll smile and nod, ask a question or two,

Cause I’m kind of in love with you

Once again, you played guitar as the crowd got ready to sing along, now familiar with the words to the chorus. Spencer wasn’t looking, but Garcia had pulled out her phone to catch his reaction. (She already had plans to play the video at your wedding one day)

You see he’s got 

1 2 3!

PHDs, and he knows exactly what I’m thinkin’ just by lookin’ at me

He knows everything about everything

Especially what to do in between the sheets

Because he’s got

1 2 3!

PHDs, so he shoulda known better than to be with someone like me

He’ll never forget a single moment of it

I just hope he won’t regret it…

Dear God, please don’t regret it!

Doctor Agent Super Genius,

It’s time to be an idiot and,

Fall in love with me

The lead guitarist had one last moment to shine as the song ended, and the crowd went wild before the band exited the stage. 

~~~

It had been 15 minutes since your show had ended, and you finally made your way out of the back. After a change of clothes, and a small pep talk from the drummer in your band, you spotted Spencer and the team at a table in the back. As you made your way over, you caught the eye of Penelope Garcia, who immediately stood up and pulled you into an unexpected hug.

“Y/N Y/L/N! I am so excited to finally meet you!” She said, letting you go for only a brief moment before pulling you into a chair between herself and your boyfriend. He only got to give you a brief hello before Penelope began introducing you to everyone. “This is Derek, Emily, JJ, Rossi, and Hotch. Oh! And I’m Penelope, your new best friend.” You laughed at her excitement, taking it all in stride.

“Hi everyone, I’m Y/N. I hope you liked the show!” At the mention of the show, Spencer’s cheeks, which had only just begun to resemble his normal skin tone, turned red again. 

“Oh trust me, Y/L/N, that was the best concert I’ve ever seen.” Derek said, laughing at Spencer’s reaction. 

“You did amazing, as always.” Spencer said, glaring at Derek briefly before planting a light kiss on your cheek. This time, it was your turn to have your cheeks heat up. 

“Please tell me you guys have a CD or something I can buy, I mean honestly, I’d be listening to your music even if it wasn’t for you dating the super genius.” Emily said, causing your face to light up.

“We don’t have any physical CDs yet, but all of our music is on itunes and spotify! We’re hoping to put together an album soon, once we record Doctor Agent Super Genius and a couple other songs we’ve written recently…” And you were off, talking about your music was always something you could do for hours. 

As you got to know the team, and they got to know you, Spencer realized how stupid it had been of him to put this off. Sure, you and Spencer were completely different, but you fit into his life perfectly. He could already tell the team loved you, and knew you’d be a part of all of their lives for years to come.

~~~

When you got home after a long night of talking at the bar, you were surprised to immediately be pulled into a kiss by your boyfriend. When he finally pulled away from you, your could only laugh before you spoke.

“What was that for?”

“Doctor Agent Super Genius.” Was his answer, before he pecked your lips one more time.

“Oh yeah? Did you like the song?” You asked, even though you already knew the answer.

“I loved it. Although, you got something wrong.” You laughed lightly, expecting him to correct some grammar or fact from the song. “Falling in love with you wasn’t stupid. It’s the smartest thing I’ve ever done.” You beamed before kissing him this time, pouring all of your love into it as best you could.

“But you were right about me knowing everything. Especially in between the sheets. Care to let me prove it?” He said once you pulled away. 

You happily let him prove his genius all night.

~~~

The Doctor closed the doors to the TARDIS, watching with a sad smile as Rose stood on the other side. He’d liked her; despite everything he’s been through, he liked having a friend with him on his adventures again. But Rose had a life, and she’d chosen to stay. That’s fine, she’ll be safer that way. Live a short but happy life with Mickey and her mom. And he’ll continue getting himself into trouble, and doing his best to help people.

The Doctor moved towards the TARDIS console, and began piloting her to a new place. “Where should we go next? 18th century? 39th? How about the 52nd, we haven’t been there in a while…” As he began to pilot the ship, pulling at the controls he knows so well, the TARDIS seemed to disagree. She whirred in disapproval, then seemed to take the wheel herself, despite the Doctor’s movements. “Where are you taking me now?” The Doctor was confused, as he’d never seen the TARDIS act this way, but hey, she usually knows what’s best. So he followed her lead, and flew the TARDIS to where she’d wanted him to go. Eventually, the TARDIS’ wheezing stopped and they landed in the early 21st century, still on Earth. Curious and excited, the Doctor ran to the TARDIS doors and opened them, only to find himself standing on a seemingly normal street in the suburbs. He guessed it was the late 2020s, give or take a few years. Before he could get a better guess of where the TARDIS had taken him, a voice calling his name distracted him.

“Doctor? What’re you doing out here?” He turned to see a girl he’d never met before. She clearly knew him, as she pulled him into a hug, despite his arms being crossed over his body. “Must be early days for you, because I clearly remember telling you that you should park her in my living room.” The girl said as she pulled away from the hug. She ignored the confused look on his face and instead made her way into his TARDIS. 

“What do you mean early days?” He asked. That’s probably not the first question he should’ve asked, but it was the one that intrigued him the most. He entered the TARDIS after her, closing the doors, and watched as she easily began flying her. “And who do you think you are to fly my TARDIS? How do you even know how to do that?” As he finished speaking, the TARDIS landed with an impressive lack of violent shaking. 

The girl lightly laughed in response, before making her way out of the TARDIS into what the Doctor could only assume to be her living room. “Doctor c’mon, you know I can’t tell you how I know how to fly her. Spoilers, remember?” She paused for a moment once she was outside, waiting for the Doctor to follow her out. Once he did, reluctantly, She made her way into her kitchen, and she started grabbing things from various cupboards. “By the way, where’s Rose? I’ve never seen you with this face without her.” 

“Rose? What - Who are you?” The girl finally stopped her actions, from the look of it, she was going to make a pot of tea, and looked up at the Doctor with wide eyes. 

“Are you serious?” She said, just above a whisper. When the Doctor didn’t answer, she took a deep breath and looked away, collecting herself. The Doctor could’ve sworn she mumbled something under her breath as she did so, but when she looked up, a smile had been slapped onto her face. “Uh- sorry. I kinda forgot this would happen eventually. I’m Y/N. We’re, uh, friends. Or we will be one day.” At this point, she’d abandoned the tea all together, and made her way back over to the Doctor. She held a hand out for him to shake. “You see, we’re always meeting in the wrong order. That’s why I know you and you don’t know me.” The Doctor held out his hand as well, allowing her to shake it. He didn’t know what to think; on one hand, it’s amazing, but on the other, he thinks he should run for the hills. Knowing your own future is a dangerous game to play, and he doesn’t want anything to do with it.

“I should probably go then. I wouldn’t want to mess up the future.” He said, turning around and heading back into the TARDIS.

“What? No!” Y/N followed him in, closing the door behind her. “You’re not messing with the future by being with me!” She argued. 

“Of course I am! You’ll end up telling me something about my future, and then it’ll be solidified. Unavoidable. A Fix-”

“I know how the future works, Doc. You’ve explained it to me hundreds of times.”

“See! Now I’ll have to explain it to you over and over, because you just told me that I did.”

“No, you explain it to me over and over because you like being the smartest person in the room.” The Doctor scoffed at her comment. Whoever this girl is to him, she’s not making the best first impression. “Scoff all you want, you know I’m right. That’s why you’re mad at me right now, because for the first time in forever you’re in a room with someone who knows more than you.” She leaned against the console towards him, a smirk on her face. The Doctor would never admit it, but she’s not entirely wrong. 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” This only made Y/N laugh. He almost started laughing along with her when the TARDIS suddenly began moving. “What’re you doing?”

“I’m not doing anything!”

“Well it’s not like she’s flying herself! You must’ve done something!”

“I flew her perfectly! If anyone did something to cause this, it’s the idiot that stole her but never bothered to read-” The TARDIS suddenly and violently landed, causing Y/N to lose her grip and land on the ground. They both stayed silent for a moment, before Y/N quietly spoke, “Do you have any idea where we are?”

“Nope.”

They looked at eachother, and almost simultaneously, smiles grew on their faces. The pair walked over to the door. The Doctor opened it, peaked his head out, and once he deemed it safe, opened the door wider so that Y/N could walk past.

“Where the hell are we?” You asked, taking in the view. You’d landed on an alien planet, that much was obvious- the multi-colored grass and two moons rising in the distance made it so even an idiot could figure that out- but neither you nor The Doctor had been to a planet like it before.

“I haven’t the faintest idea.” The Doctor answered you with a grin slapped on his face. Even though he didn’t know this girl, and all logic said he should stay the hell away, something about her felt right. Especially when you returned his grin with just as much enthusiasm.

“Fantastic. I love a good mystery.” And with that, you picked a direction and began walking, leaving The Doctor, dumbfounded, to follow you. “Come along, Doc, we don’t have all day!” The Doctor only scoffed, but followed the mystery girl anyways.

“So what did you mean by us meeting in the wrong order?” The Doctor questioned, trying to figure you out. “Why don’t I just visit you linearly? After all, I’ve got a time machine.” 

“Oh, you tried. The TARDIS won’t let you. Whenever you visit me, she won’t let you land where you want. She never seems to have a problem getting me home to the right time though.” You explained, marching through the tall rainbow grass. “Except for once, we accidentally landed at; well, spoilers. But it all works out in the end, always does. She probably brought us here for a reason too.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. Sure, sometimes the TARDIS influences my travels a little bit-” You interrupted him with a scoff, which The Doctor happily ignored- “But she doesn’t just fly herself. Not without help from me. Something else must have brought us here.” 

“Oh, so you think a random, seemingly uninhabited planet was able to hijack the TARDIS?” The Doctor would never admit it, but you did have a point. They’d been walking for a while, and so far there were no signs of any civilization. Certainly nothing with the kind of technology to hijack a TARDIS. 

“No, I think you don’t know how to fly her properly and you did something to make her bring us here.” He lied. He’d watched her flying, and even he had to accept that she knew what she was doing. But he wasn’t about to tell her that. 

“Oh, please-” You cut yourself off, distracted by something happening behind The Doctor. When he turned around, his breath was taken away by the sight. As they had been talking, the sun had begun to set and the moons of the unknown planet began to rise higher. Around them, a flurry of insects had begun flying around. They looked like butterflies, only bigger. Their wings had a faint glow to them, and it was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. Y/N moved next to him, taking in the sight for herself. Soon enough, The Doctor found himself looking at her rather than the insects. One of them landed on her arm, and she turned to look at The Doctor with a wide grin. Just as The Doctor returned it, however, your grin morphed into a look of pain.

“Jesus Christ!” You swatted the bug off of your arm, where it had left a quickly swelling bite. 

“Back to the TARDIS!” The Doctor yelled, grabbing your hand and dragging you back. Now that you’d brought attention to yourselves, the insect swarm seemed to be flying after you.

“What are the odds of these things being poisonous?” You asked as you ran, the TARDIS coming closer and closer. 

“I don’t know, but you shouldn’t be worried about them being poisonous.” He answered.

“Why not?”

“Cause you didn’t eat one. You should be worried about them being venomous.” He corrected, despite the dire situation.

“Doc!”

~~~

Turns out, those insects, which The Doctor had identified as Derruliflies from the planet Taurillia once you two had made it back to the TARDIS, weren’t any more dangerous than a mosquito. Besides the initially painful bite and the inflammation, you’d be fine. That didn’t stop you from complaining though.

“I can’t believe the TARDIS brought us to that dreadful planet!” You’d been complaining for a half hour now, as The Doctor tried to bring the swelling on your arm down. Despite the fact that the venom wouldn’t harm you much, Your arm ended up extremely swollen, and The Doctor couldn’t very well drop you off on earth without knowing how long the swelling would take to go away or if there would be any other side effects. So now he was doing his best to remove the venom, despite your complaints. “I mean seriously! What was she thinking? You know, I bet she knew those creatures would bite me. I think this is payback for when I was learning how to fly her.”

“What’d you do when you were learning how to fly her?” The Doctor asked, still focused on your now slightly less swollen arm.

“Let’s just say it took me a minute to figure it out.” You said, with a slight grimace. “My teacher was very patient with me, though, so I got there in the end.”

“You’re welcome in advance, then.” The Doctor assumed he’d been the one to teach her in the future, after all, no one else knows how to fly a TARDIS anymore, but your laughter proved that was not the case.

“Please! Riv-um, my teacher had to kick you out because you kept trying to be a backseat driver. You were worse than my dad when he was teaching me to drive a car.” You joked. “And you and I both know you’re hardly qualified to teach someone how to fly a TARDIS, considering you can barely fly her yourself.”

“That’s not true! I’m an excellent driver!”

“You didn’t even pass your exams!” The Doctor only rolled his eyes in response, causing you to laugh even more. 

“Whatever. Your arm is all fixed, by the way. You’re welcome.” He said, dropping your arm from his hands. He’d managed to remove the venom, which had caused the swelling and itching to go away rather rapidly. “You may have some residual itching for a few hours, but you’ll be back to normal in a jiff.”

“Thank you.” You said, genuinely, causing The Doctor to meet your eyes. “Really, you didn’t have to do that.”

“Course I did. I’m a Doctor, and you’re my friend.” He paused, “Or, you will be, I guess.”

“C’mon Doc, you and I both know I’m already your friend.”

~~~

When The Doctor brought you home- you were right, the TARDIS was more than happy to drop you off in the right time- he didn’t really want to say goodbye. He wanted to get to know you more, take you with him.

“You sure you wanna go?” He asked, just before you could open the doors back to your life. Your eyebrows shot up, surprised he had asked. Surely he’d asked you to join him before, right? “I mean, I can drop you off here anytime. Why not stay a while?” You gave him a soft smile, before coming over and doing something unexpected; you kissed his cheek. 

“Time machine.” 

“What?”

You were backing up towards the doors, still with that knowing smile on your face. “Rose. You forgot to tell her that it’s a time machine.” And with that, you turned around, walking out of The TARDIS. Even though he knew he’d see you many more times in the future, The Doctor was still sad to see you go.