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memory (n.) the encoding, storage, and retrieval in the human mind of past experiences.

               They say memories linger in certain scents or in objects that are linked to a specific event. Some say memories are in emotions, how one event that made us feel a specific way will remind us of another that does the same. But what of the memories that we cannot anchor to feelings or anything concrete, do we just forget over time?

               My memory was never the best. My mind is always scattered and to retain happening events or information, I have to do my utmost best to focus. I always find myself recalling yesterday events and coming up with nothing, unsure if my life is really uneventful or I’m just forgetful. There are numerous times when I feel out of the loop because my family or friends will talk about something that happened and my mind bank stored little to no information. Is my capacity low or something? I feel bad, not gonna lie; I’m very insecure about my memories.

               Have you watched the series “Sherlock” produced by BBC? It’s a series inspired by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes detective stories. You should check it out, it’s really good. (If you’re going to watch it, the next sentences are a slight spoiler.) I am reminded of a scene in the series where Sherlock has a mind palace. His memory storage is like a literal palace in his brain. He visualizes his memories kept behind doors and when he opens one, he recalls them vividly with all the certain details. In contrast, I’d liken my memory storage to cue cards that are unsorted. No labels, no color coding, no titles, no details. Just cue card with a key word, hoping that I’ll somehow recall by a miracle. Maybe it’s because Sherlock is observant and I’m not. Sherlock pays attention to detail, I don’t.

               I made a discovery about myself and my memories though, and it’s about the MBTI Personality types. MBTI makes use of the four cognitive function—thinking and feeling, and sensing and intuition. (If you want to learn more about it, click here). I found out about this around a year ago due to my boredom during the lockdown. I took a test from 16Personalities and got the result of ISTP-A. ISTP’s have the dominant Internal Thinking which I think plays a big part with my memories. Dominant Internal thinkers tend to make sense of their present situation through their past experiences and although experiences are similar to memories, they’re not the same thing. Memories are a general catalog of what happened, meanwhile experience is the substantial information from an experience. So ISTP’s don’t really keep track of things that don’t align to what they believe or not meeting their interests. This is where I believe my memories go missing. This trait makes me more often than not indifferent to everything unless it concerns me. I don’t know if it’s a pro or con but people come to me to tell secrets, because I forget about it after a week or two. But they say I managed to help while I remembered their situation because ISTP’s are known to be objective and good problem-solvers. Disclaimer though, you might get the wrong idea—I DON’T act like I do because I found out I’m an ISTP, I’m an ISTP because of how I act.