I don’t completely understand why you did what you did. You always told me you’d be there for me no matter what, that you’d be there for me no matter how moody either of us got. You told me I’d be the first person you’d tell when you were pregnant with a baby, you made me cry with joy when I thought that you wanted a future that had me in it, that meant so very much to me. You told me I was your favourite person, took me to my first ever concert, was there for my first highs, and an awful lot of my lows. And I miss you so much that it hurts. And know it hasn’t even been that long - but when I think about the fact that we’ll never be able to buy an insane amount of food together, or go thrifting, or watch terrible films, or just even talk, it fucking kills me. And I’m sorry for whatever I did, or however I acted to make you feel like our friendship wasn’t worth it anymore, but I’m sorry, and I know you might not ever see this, but if you ever do, know that I still love you, and I hope you’re happy, all I want is for you to be happy. I want to respect your decision and not bother you, and I don’t want this to change your mind, but you’ll always be the best friend I ever had, I really am sorry. I will find you in my next life, and I’ll do better next time, I promise. Stay safe my dear
