Crackship from Hell

Y'all ever just...write almost a whe fic and then decide you hate all of it lmfao

Honestly no one else has to even ship sev and muds at this point, I just want people to see why it would be funny for these two characters with an extremely similar vibe and backstory but who have radically different personalities to hang out and shittalk their fathers together

Literally the only thing different about sniccals and in particular the anguine au is severus now has an annoying goblin following him around. Thats it, that's the only difference. His life bites and now he has a goblin man making aimless commentary about it

Its clearly not fair odds for sev even with having one (1) friend privy to the bullying, but murdocs the type of guy who figures if hes gonna get his ass kicked, hes gonna get the last word in, and i think severus would find something both grating and comforting in that

Im constantly thinking about roto describing baby murdoc bothering other students with "quacking noises and malicious humor" because hes a little shit, and like...something about imagining him being like that at hogwarts paired off with snape is just...infinitely funny. Nothing about that isnt funny. Snape gets bullied constatly and his life is just as terrible as its always been but at least now he has a mean annoying goblin boy with a loud mouth and no impulse control to keep him company

Me, the more hours i dedicate to research and meta for this absurd crackship: fuck, I'm ruining this whole thing! I know nothing! People will see me for the fraud that i am