Happy Place

I’ve never said voting for the other ship instead of Malec makes them a bad person but sending racist hate does make them a bad person. All POC in the fandom want is Magnus and Alec’s relationship to get the recognition that it deserves.

If Malec wins it will show the writers how much we love Malec (despite some of the problematic writing) and we want them to write beautiful Malec moments. It will show QPOC (including mentally ill POC) that their representation is important and they matter to the fandom.

I honestly do not understand what you mean when you say that season 2 destroyed Noora and that William treated her badly. Was she destroyed because she fell in love? Did William treat her bad because he fell in love with her and did'nt hesitate to tell her that he did? Who has the power in that relationship? Noora. She falls for William at an early stage. She gives him all sorts of mixed signals because she does'nt want to admit she has fallen for him. He respects her boundaries all the way.

Okay, where do I start.

This is a good start:

I’m really not trying to be confrontational, but what we know is that he kept texting her since more or less the end of the first season, and she never responded. He texted her about how her shirt looked cute and what she did was covering herself (instead of, like, showing herself more if this was a chasing game). Seeing that his techniques didn’t work, he literally used Vilde again, called her and asked to speak with Noora, and then said this. B l a c k m a i l, plain and simple. He blackmailed her into going on a date. This is not someone who respects boundaries, we can argue that he does respect her boundaries about sex–i was put off by the bad translation in the last episode–but that’s not him respecting Noora’s boundaries.

Also, she gives him all sorts of mixed signals  because she does'nt want to admit she has fallen for him is… not true. She starts to play the chasing game after she decides to stay and sleep at his after the party, before that all the signals are negative, she doesn’t want his attentions, she doesn’t want anything to do with him. She literally has to be blackmailed into going on a date, and when Eskild tells her that she looks pretty with the lipstick on, she takes that off because she doesn’t want to be seen as pretty by William. The mixed signal stuff is literally why, socially, men can’t get hints, like. Why the fuck do men go up and talk to a woman who’s wearing headphones? Because they think it’s mixed signals, not that the–rightfully–wants to be left alone.

William didn’t treat her badly because he fell in love with her and didn’t hesitate to tell her that. William treated her badly because he didn’t accept a no for three months straight and then blackmailed her into going on a date, like I’m not sure how the fact that he blackmailed her into going on a date can be seen as anything rather than an awful breach of boundaries. (Like, even if she did actually enjoy his company–and at that point she did not–it would have still been fucking yikes!!! Because he didn’t know she enjoyed his company and wanted him, since she was literally in radio silence for three+ months, or he wouldn’t have had to call Vilde to get a hold of her!!!) And if Noora had the power at that point, there wouldn’t have been a date.

Now, of course when we talk about Noorhelm should/shouldn’t have happened we’re talking about nothing, because it did happen and it wasn’t framed as abusive, so like.

To address your last point, no. She was destroyed because the things she was supposed to learn (to trust people and not to do everything alone; to stop being so judgemental) were twisted and used to tear her down. Stop being so judgemental does mean that she has to stop treating Vilde like she does, but doesn’t mean that she literally has to undergo gaslighting and emotional manipulation because the boy had a bad past:

And trust people and stop doing everything alone does mean she has to ask for help instead of having that mental breakdown (I loved how the date rape arc was handled, felt so realistic on her part), but doesn’t mean she has to say she was sorry to William just because she wants to solve things with him, when he treated her so horribly re:the date rape.

Noora in s1 is such a strong and amazing character, Noora in s2 slowly gets destroyed, and, from her straight A student status, she drops school in the bat of an eye to follow her new boyfriend in London. Noora in s3 is a)a weak character from a writing pov, who only exists in function of William–true for s2 also, since it was basically all about him and not her–ad b)an empty shell, a shadow of what she was before.

You must also remember that how Noora is portrayed in season 3 is very different because we now see her through Isak’s eyes. We just see these small glimpses of what Isak sees, not who she actually is.

And last: Why is only William being called out on his behavior towards women? Vilde singles him out because he is good looking and because she expects him to be good in bed and shallow enough to not care. She uses him to lose her virginity. He never promises her anything, yet he is the bad person for sleeping with her.

I am all for supporting women and applauding them being strong and independent (being a woman myself), but it rubs me the wrong way when we insist on calling men out on their behavior while at the same time we choose to accept women who do the same.

I literally showed you screenshots and gave you examples. I don’t care if you don’t agree, these are things that literally happened in the show. Like if you don’t show me examples of real things happened in the show I’m just gonna conclude you’re doing the equivalent of putting your hands on your ears and shouting LALALALALALALALA I CAN’T HEAR YOU because you were indoctrinated by the rape culture in this society. It’s your prerogative, but then we have nothing to discuss about, because I don’t function like this (and if I do, I try to realise and unlearn it).

I can agree that that is playing a bit dirty, but I would not call it blackmail and use of power. 

(source.)

You must also remember that how Noora is portrayed in season 3 is very different because we now see her through Isak’s eyes. We just see these small glimpses of what Isak sees, not who she actually is. 

This is up for debate. I do think that we see a change in perspective, but also. She drops out of school. Fact, or she would be at Nissen. She’s literally not even in kosegruppa, and we know the girl gang would let her participate because they love her and because they let Kaspar in. Fact. So like. What does she do? If she’s not with her friends and doesn’t go to school? She’s a shell of what she was before, or she would participate inher friend’s life.

(Arguable: from a writing pov, they didn’t know what to do with her because Thomas Hayes wasn’t supposed to drop out doing the lord’s work, so they wrote her in at the last minute and she didn’t have a real story to follow. I understand, but still. They could have found something.)

Vilde singles him out because he is good looking and because she expects him to be good in bed and shallow enough to not care. She uses him to lose her virginity.

Vilde is a closeted lesbian, if you’re unable to see the signs of that (she says she’s not turned on by William but she gets turned on at the mention of feminine things; she’s obsessed with Noora being a lesbian in s2; she says she didn’t feel anything with William but with Eva she got horny; she says she’s relieved when Noora tells her she’s with William) then there’s no doubt you can’t see the signs of Noorhelm being abusive lmao like. Again, do we even have something to discuss?

And I don’t like the victim tag people are trying to put on Noora. She is strong, independant and happens to fall in love with William. 

I—the only person who thinks that abuse survivors aren’t strong is you here. Abuse survivors are arguably stronger than people who weren’t abused, because they went through hell and they survived, and became stronger people because of trauma.

Abuse survivors are punk as fuck and raw as fuck. We’re strong, and we went through something that who didn’t experience abuse can’t even start to imagine.

So, saying that Noora is an abuse survivor is not denying her strenght and independence, but it’s putting the blame for her being hurt where the blame is, namely on William, who is abusive.

And what is that argument you came up with that what Vilde did is ok because she is a closeted lesbian? What she did was not ok no matter what her reasons were.

I honestly do not understand what you mean when you say that season 2 destroyed Noora and that William treated her badly. Was she destroyed because she fell in love? Did William treat her bad because he fell in love with her and did'nt hesitate to tell her that he did? Who has the power in that relationship? Noora. She falls for William at an early stage. She gives him all sorts of mixed signals because she does'nt want to admit she has fallen for him. He respects her boundaries all the way.

Okay, where do I start.

This is a good start:

I’m really not trying to be confrontational, but what we know is that he kept texting her since more or less the end of the first season, and she never responded. He texted her about how her shirt looked cute and what she did was covering herself (instead of, like, showing herself more if this was a chasing game). Seeing that his techniques didn’t work, he literally used Vilde again, called her and asked to speak with Noora, and then said this. B l a c k m a i l, plain and simple. He blackmailed her into going on a date. This is not someone who respects boundaries, we can argue that he does respect her boundaries about sex–i was put off by the bad translation in the last episode–but that’s not him respecting Noora’s boundaries.

Also, she gives him all sorts of mixed signals  because she does'nt want to admit she has fallen for him is… not true. She starts to play the chasing game after she decides to stay and sleep at his after the party, before that all the signals are negative, she doesn’t want his attentions, she doesn’t want anything to do with him. She literally has to be blackmailed into going on a date, and when Eskild tells her that she looks pretty with the lipstick on, she takes that off because she doesn’t want to be seen as pretty by William. The mixed signal stuff is literally why, socially, men can’t get hints, like. Why the fuck do men go up and talk to a woman who’s wearing headphones? Because they think it’s mixed signals, not that the–rightfully–wants to be left alone.

William didn’t treat her badly because he fell in love with her and didn’t hesitate to tell her that. William treated her badly because he didn’t accept a no for three months straight and then blackmailed her into going on a date, like I’m not sure how the fact that he blackmailed her into going on a date can be seen as anything rather than an awful breach of boundaries. (Like, even if she did actually enjoy his company–and at that point she did not–it would have still been fucking yikes!!! Because he didn’t know she enjoyed his company and wanted him, since she was literally in radio silence for three+ months, or he wouldn’t have had to call Vilde to get a hold of her!!!) And if Noora had the power at that point, there wouldn’t have been a date.

Now, of course when we talk about Noorhelm should/shouldn’t have happened we’re talking about nothing, because it did happen and it wasn’t framed as abusive, so like.

To address your last point, no. She was destroyed because the things she was supposed to learn (to trust people and not to do everything alone; to stop being so judgemental) were twisted and used to tear her down. Stop being so judgemental does mean that she has to stop treating Vilde like she does, but doesn’t mean that she literally has to undergo gaslighting and emotional manipulation because the boy had a bad past:

And trust people and stop doing everything alone does mean she has to ask for help instead of having that mental breakdown (I loved how the date rape arc was handled, felt so realistic on her part), but doesn’t mean she has to say she was sorry to William just because she wants to solve things with him, when he treated her so horribly re:the date rape.

Noora in s1 is such a strong and amazing character, Noora in s2 slowly gets destroyed, and, from her straight A student status, she drops school in the bat of an eye to follow her new boyfriend in London. Noora in s3 is a)a weak character from a writing pov, who only exists in function of William–true for s2 also, since it was basically all about him and not her–ad b)an empty shell, a shadow of what she was before.

You must also remember that how Noora is portrayed in season 3 is very different because we now see her through Isak's eyes. We just see these small glimpses of what Isak sees, not who she actually is.

And last: Why is only William being called out on his behavior towards women? Vilde singles him out because he is good looking and because she expects him to be good in bed and shallow enough to not care. She uses him to lose her virginity. He never promises her anything, yet he is the bad person for sleeping with her.

I am all for supporting women and applauding them being strong and independent (being a woman myself), but it rubs me the wrong way when we insist on calling men out on their behavior while at the same time we choose to accept women who do the same.

Conversation between Eva and Iben in season 1