Unrelenting Force Of Nature

As terrified as many humans were of rats, he knew how to get around them unnoticed. It was the same here: there was hardly a scratch of claws as he climbed up onto the uneven plane of a stump so he was less underfoot. Only when he was perched there did he continue this unexpected conversation.

"I would say so." Such allegiences extended to the five great nations, especially.

"I am not allied to any village or person myself. I choose not to be. I wouldn't even call myself a Ninja, really."

She had no formal training or indoctrination to truly deem herself as one. Just a wild girl living in the woods by her lonesome trying to survive. Likely similar to this rat's lifestyle!

Kakuzu nodded, briefly considering the mental image of her werehare form wedged halfway into a vent and clawing furiously at the inside. Maybe he'd find it more amusing later, when the danger had passed.

He watched her get to her feet and decided they'd take the journey at her pace. Any other time he'd offer to carry her there, but past conversations say the motion wouldn't agree with her.

And so they walked. It didn’t take them terribly long to reach the barrier that hid the safehouse. It rippled as Kakuzu passed through, but behind it was a long, low concrete building with no windows and a heavy metal door. The seal on the door reacted to his ring and unlocked; it groaned as he pulled it open and gestured for Margaret to step inside.

Inside were shelves of medical supplies, shelf-stable food, and water, along with space to roll out a place to sleep. 

Regardless, they made it on time. There's still enough daylight in the sky that they were in the safe zone. No need to worry about wrangling a loose, frenzied werehare and trying to get her to sit still.

Margaret eyes the interior as the doors creek and groan open. It's... a bit dusty, but she can manage it. She peeks out again, then back inside. No windows, no extra doors. Just the vents, as Kakuzu mentioned. Well, the vents and the various rations and non-perishables, medical supplies, and even water.

"... This will do," She said, stepping forward after inspecting what she could. "Ideally, there should be no problem with me staying in here, as I don't think anything outside should be able to catch my attention."

The kunoichi pauses... And she rests a hand on one of the metal doors as she looks to her mentor.

He could practically smell her anxiety. He wasn't sure what was causing it, but whatever bode ill for something her size didn't bode well for anyone, he supposed. Was it wise to linger? Probably not... but her question struck him as almost amusing.

Him? A ninja? He'd heard of such masters of stealth in stories shared by other rats in Cluny's army, those who had traveled the wider world before being absorbed into his ranks. He shook his head.

"Oh. Well, that explains why I did not see or hear you until now."

Should he linger? Well, on this night, yes, he could. Tonight, luckily, wasn't the full moon yet. The Waxing Gibbous gave her some anxiety, but it's not as bad as the very night itself. She'd feel even worse to the point of nausea.

Still, though, her eyes try to scan over this smaller fellow. He didn't sound like he was from this region. The accent gave that much away. Perhaps it's why the style of his little cloak looked strange?

"Ninja animals are the norm here. It's a common job for us humans, and it tends to extend to animals as well. What you do with it depends on the person... and their allegiance.

     For all those monstrous muses out there! Be cautious if you’re not comfortable with mentions of body horror, blood, and violence. There is also plenty of cursing in this meme. Special thanks to @vriisket​ for helping me come up with a lot of these!

“I, uh… I’m having a hard time believing you’re anything close to human.”

“Hey! Wanna see me shove a tentacle through someone’s eye socket?”

“I’m pretty sure human anatomy doesn’t work that way, but okay!”

“Oh, shit, dude! Nice horns! Can I touch them?”

“Have you come to destroy reality as I know it, or are you a benevolent kind of monstrosity?”

“What the FUCK is going on with your face?”

“Y’know what? I’m not even going to ask about all of the eyes.”

“How do you go to the bathroom?”

“Do those teeth serve ANY purpose?”

“Is that slime acidic?”

“If I touch you, will I die?”

“Dude! You can’t just go around, smashing your enemies into walls with those… those… Whatever those are!”

“I can devour my enemies whole, and I will.”

“Are… Are those…? Never mind. I don’t want to know.”

“If I promise to worship you as the new all-powerful divine ruler of our worthless dimension, will you let me live?”

“Swear your loyalty to me, and you might just survive the end of the world.”

“Back in my home dimension, we used to eat planets and stars for fun!”

“Have you ever had to pick out the bony remains of some poor human who dared to question your authority from your teeth?”

“You’ve got me scared to even disagree with you on simple things, dude. Put those claws away!”

“Do you know what a shower is?”

“I eat hearts. Literally.”

“And what sort of unspeakable horror have I upset this time?”

“Do you melt when in direct contact with water?”

“Whoa! …Lovecraft would be proud.”

“Did I step into an H.R. Giger exhibit?”

“I don’t think I would really mind if you took over our world! I mean, you look pretty cool, and I don’t think you could do any worse than our current world leaders.”

“So… do you bleed? Like, at all?”

“I am sufficiently horrified and all you did was move three feet.”

“My blood looks like a rainbow!”

“Are you, perhaps, related to Cthulhu?”

“I’ve got several tusks here with your name on all of them.”

“I was born from human agony.”

“What? Did you think I would shift forms to look more like one of your species? Please!”

“Wait, so… You can shapeshift?”

“Why do you only have one eye?”

“That is some weird blood ya got there. Why isn’t it red?”

“Are you able to see more colors than humans?”

“Oh, shit! I didn’t think that stupid summoning spell would actually work!”

“How long have you been watching me from the shadows?”

“Please don’t eat me! I don’t have any nutritional value!”

“Do you know the secrets of the universe? If so, can you teach them to me?”

“I NEVER want to encounter you when you’re mad EVER again! That was disturbing on SO MANY levels!”

“Morality is stupid, and so are you if you think I’m gonna abide by human morals.”

“Okay, like… This question has been bothering me a lot lately. Do you eat people? Is that rude to ask?”

“WHY DO YOU HAVE SO MANY MOUTHS? WHAT’S THE POINT?!”

“I’m starting to think releasing you from your ancient prison was a mistake.”

“The more arms you have, the more hugs you can give! Right? Right?? That’s… That’s why you have so many arms, right?”

“Please eat our president. We don’t like him.”

“No, no, no! NO! I am SO not ready for another monster war!”

“Look what I can do with my hands!”

“Are all of those eyes really necessary? Like, really?”

“How did you fit through the door?”

“Are emotions just a human thing? Do you feel emotions?”

“That’s species-ist, pal.”

“It’s called aflehiba, but you humans wouldn’t understand.”

“From one monster to another… What the fuck?”

“FUCK OFF, JOHN! YOU’RE NOT EVEN TASTY!”

“Would it hurt you if I cut off one of your legs?”

“YOU FOOL! YOU’VE SUMMONED THE GREAT- are those marshmallows?”

“Aww, yeah! Monster party!”

“I never thought anyone could be the living embodiment of every paradox and optical illusion in existence until I met you. So, from the bottom of my heart, I just want to say… Go fuck yourself.”

“So does… does that always do that?”

“Humans and their stupid concepts of ‘good’ and ‘evil.’ Don’t they understand that their lifespans are too short to care about morals?”

“How long do you live? And how long is that in years?”

“Look… I know you’re not Satan, but, uh… Not today, Satan.”

“I accept you as our new god! …Please don’t eat me.”

“Not all monsters are bad, kiddo. I just happen to be one of the worst ones in existence!”

“What’s the deal with deals? Why do you want to make them so badly?”

“Nah, buddy! I don’t do contracts. My guardian always told me never to trust weird eldritch horrors offering contracts in dark, abandoned alley ways.”

“Can you even die?”

“Is that a tooth or a claw?”

“Can you tell me the exact time and date of my death?”