Cringetopia @smelly--welly - Tumblr Blog

Apollo's introduction post yada yada welcome to my yap-sesh

It's very long so I put it under the cut :)

Stimboard masterlist at the end (Requests welcome!!)

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bruzum

hungwy

My favorite sport to play is sleep in bed. Here are the rules: you need a bed and a blanky and a pillow. You lay on bed with your head on pillow and blanky on you. You lay there and fall asleep for some time until morning. This means you win. Im going to go play it now

hungwy

My DETESTED sport to play is DIE in NARROW CREVICE. Here are the rules: you need a NARROW CREVICE and a SNAPPING TURTLE and a ASBESTOS. You lay IN the NARROW CREVICE with your head on SNAPPING TURTLE and ASBESTOS on you. You lay there and fall DEAD for some time until NEVER. This means you LOSE. Im going to play it now

Cherry Blossom Cookie from Cookie Run stimboard :)

💞 💗 💞

🌸 🍪 🌸

💗 💞 💗

huffylemon

triviallytrue

aren't gorillas gentle giants or something. i stay out of his way, he doesn't maul me, we have a nice time picking out clothes together in opposite sides of the mall

friendshapedhole

Male gorillas are super aggressive and territorial. Also they interpret nearly every human mannerism as a sign of aggression or a challenge. Smiling and eye contact are both things that zookeepers have to be taught to suppress when they’re in the vicinity of gorillas.

triviallytrue

Well unless the mall is his native territory I think I'm fine, I wasn't planning on smiling at him

max1461

This is all irrelevant because the obvious answer is five black mambas. I mean, that’s not actually very many snakes, and malls are fucking huge. And unlike a gorilla you can definitely outrun a snake if it does show up. Find an open space in the mall where you can see any snake coming and just hangout out there. Fucking easy.

triviallytrue

Misguided! I would much rather have a mallmate I can easily see and hear coming. I'm confident I can stay out of the gorilla's way, but if I step on a snake or one otherwise gets the jump on me, it's all over.

It's not just about the physical danger either, it's about my mental health. One gorilla, unless he's actively mad at me, I just keep a healthy distance between us and make sure I never get trapped. With the snakes, it requires a lot more constant vigilance

ghostpalmtechnique

They should substitute "chimpanzee" for "gorilla" in this hypothetical.

triviallytrue

if it was a chimp i'm taking the fucking snakes

notwiselybuttoowell

Black mambas have a reputation build on being very venomous and very fast. I'm not sure why you would think you could outrun one (or five) in an enclosed space like a mall.

chaumas-deactivated20240115

Malls usually have pretty slick floors, and escalators. I’d choose the gorilla simply because I think that would make an more interesting story (and a better-selling autobiography, I Survived the Mall Gorilla) but I think I’d stand a pretty good chance at avoiding the mamba. They’re fast and aggressive and will chase you but unless we started immediately beside each other I think my sneakers would have the terrain advantage over scutes.

nightingalesoul

this is too good to leave hidden in the replies

bermuda-n-drangle

fucking enamored with the implication that this gorilla is fully intelligent but is trying to manufacture plausible deniability like the movie barnyard

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driftingthruspace

animal abuse 💔

#the way he falls over in the first gif never fails to make me laugh #is he stupid 💔#gifs #rhps #riff raff rhps #frank n furter

abbykmtr-13

GIRLS ✨ DEPRESSED✨ (JK they take their meds)

Dispatch ladies for the soul.

#fanart #dispatch #prism dispatch #invisigal dispatch #blonde blazer dispatch #coupe dispatch #malevola gibb

rane-forrest

u n l i k l e y l o v e r s

#falsettos #fanart #marvin gardens #whizzer brown #whizzvin

bird-gifs-collection-agency

why is he in the dark someone save him. maybe it's just an invisible bridge over a void? maybe he knoews what hes doing

#gifs

axolotluv

Please give us your data 🥺🥺🥺🥺 For the children 😢‼️ all of your legal information 🙏🙏 yes 🥺 your home address? 🥺 Your government issued ID 😢❓social security number and credit card details 🤗 immigration status ❓ racial religious and gender identity 😁😢😢😢⁉️ please 🥺 did you get an abortion this year 🥺 please give us your personal information 🥺🥺🥺🥺 for the children‼️‼️

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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problematic-twink

Be a tender, slow-cooked brisket for mommy. Lather yourself in butter and rub various spices all over your body. Smoke for 18 hours at 110⁰C. Rest for 4-6 hours.

#brisketplay #<< im fucking crying

pinetears

stupid

#hendrick joliet easterman #outlast #fanart

uncertainbravado

do you understand

#cats the musical #munkustrap #alonzo cats #fanart

secondbeatsongs

Visit Original Link

“Call Me Maybe” with every other beat removed

pucket

transfemininomenon

YOU’RE STUBBORN, JEANS STOLEN, NIGHT ROWING

THINK YOU’RE BABY?

senshimeshi

HEY AND YOU, AMAZING, BUT YOMBER, SO CLAYBE

mossdragon

my gf crafted this with lots of care for yall. pls enjoy:

secondbeatsongs

losing my mind over this

laurelindorenan

THINK YOU’RE BABY?!

#gifs

pechadex

My friend referred to Kieran as “The Indigo Dork” once and now I call him that regularly in my head

#pokemon #kieran pokemon

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knyee

Doodle of my cutieful Pouncival

#pouncival #cats the musical #fanart

adobe-outdesign

why did no one tell me that the new Pitch Black set has a Slowpoke with the funniest move name ever

#omg i love him #pokemon #slowpoke

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