Beasts.

i bet the pain will end if i arrange a perfect enough sentence about it

“we live in an uncaring universe” yeah dude and I live in an uncaring house. and I shit in an uncaring toilet. but do you touch an uncaring lover? do you comfort an uncaring child? do you guide to sleep each night a cold and uncaring self?

please hurry up in reblogging this I wanna jorts it before someone puts it in one of those heartwarming tiktok slideshows

i was like 'what could jorts it possibly mean' but as with many things clicking the original post immediately clarified the situation

so ummm welcome to my jar:) lemme show you around! theres some holes poked in the top so i can breathe, theres some leaves to munch on, and ive even got a twig! #mytwig

underrated friendship stage is the "testing the waters to see how much of a freak you are" stage. let me microdose being feral to see how you react. i have one large eye on you at all times waiting for you to give me Secret Permission to be a pervert or a weirdo. when will the shameless whore dam break. The Freak Rituals are sacred and time honoured and their importance cannot be overstated

why is it so hot. why is it so hot. I am being punished.

it goes without saying that i will be using the word angrypenny as if it was part of the common vernacular instead of a term that my dreaming brain conjured up i.e. "he's all about the angrypennies" (derogatory way to refer to a guy who searches for reasons to be angry and possibly lacks introspection)

auto immune disorders happen when the immune system ignores regulatory factors and begins attacking healthy bodily tissues, due to what scientists refer to as "sheer love of the game"

the oldest reblogs for this post that i can find are from january 2nd of 2013. this can has been getting kicked around tumblr for almost 13½ years now

And yet somehow this is my first time kicking it!

what do you mean there are exactly zero rats i. this post

DOES IT NOT STOP