i really can't get over how mitski captured how fear of your own imperfections can lead you to see yourself as unworthy of the people you love, and how that fear grows and consumes you if you let it until your self destructive tendencies spill over into your relationships, and when it's all gone and you're all that's left you can only blame yourself. the only heartbreaker.

feels like every few weeks I have to relearn how to exist, that I do need to sit in the sun and move my body and not drink too much coffee and dress in clothes that make me feel good and talk to my friends and journal and get off my phone sometimes and eat vegetables and drink more tea and generally reclaim the space in my life for myself ya know

not to be dramatic or anything but i would fucking die for you violet

sometimes the sound of the earth is so loud!!!!!!!!! sometimes i sit on the grass and feel like crying!!!!!! i feel like the grass is so close to me we are almost the same!!!!!! and then the wind blows over me and i could just live in this forever!!!!!!!!!

yuck i fucking hate having ~cinematic~ mental illness moments. was in the bathroom just now trying to put in my earrings and my hands were shaking so bad it took me like five minutes and i was getting irrationally upset so i started tearing up and it's like. ugh. this WOULD be the scene in a movie that shows that the character's emotional health has completely gone to shit. ugh.