brace yourself

Best Friends to Almost-Lovers to Strangers

bonus sketch below:

BOY DO I

sally loves hazel the moment she meets her and whenever hazel comes to visit they just sit in the kitchen talking

i know i’ve said this before but percy and hazel hold hands all the time for no reason like no matter where they’re going they’re always holding hands

on the nights they were both sick in boo they sat up telling each other stories and giggling and probably crying a little through the stall walls

when percy’s in college in new rome hazel comes to visit and sleeps over in his room a lot

neither of them are all that great at dealing with their natural hair so usually they’re both just like “fuck it” and don’t even bother

BUT in a year or two hazel decides to twist it and she rocks it and percy’s just like “whoOA u go omg”

hazel can pick percy up (pretty easily too)

hazel holds percy’s hand when he gets nervous

percy’s usually too shy/embarrassed to actually try to sing well in front of people but he’ll sing around hazel

hazel loves riding on blackjack

percy mimicks the way she fans herself in a really exaggerated, dramatic way when she gets embarrassed because it makes her laugh

percy loves shopping and he drags hazel along all the time

as soon as september ends they are watching the nightmare before christmas non-stop until the end of the year

both hazel and percy swear a lot (get ur saint hazel headcanons outta here she used to get her mouth washed out with soap in school) and whenever they’re watching a movie together you can hear them down the hall just yelling “what the FUCK” “shisiIT SHIT shit”

whenever they’re hanging out they always end up tangled on top of each other with limbs all over the place in the most uncomfortable positions but they don’t even really realize they’re sitting/lying like that until someone comes in and is like “what the heck”

hazel takes percy to new orleans at some point and percy falls in love with the place

hazel goes to all of percy’s college swim meets to cheer him on

also to make fun of his speedo

the two of them have the worst resting bitch faces so whenever they’re together it looks like they’re about to beat you up

percy can’t dance for his life but hazel takes him out dancing anyway

percy takes hazel to see a broadway musical and hazel is in awe the entire time

percy has to shave his entire body for swimming and he goes to hazel like “thiS IS AWFUL HOW DO YOU DO IT” and she’s like “uh i don’t”

but she helps him figure it out and after a while percy’s like “damn my legs are silky smooth i’m gonna keep doing this even when the swim season ends” and when people are like “bro what” he’s like “excuse me i need to be as hydrodynamic as possible i am a son of poseidon this leg hair is bogging me down”

percy needs glasses but refuses to get them and ends up sitting there like “i can’t see what does that say” and “wait hang on what’s that” and hazel’s just like “please get glasses this is getting out of hand” and he’s like “no i can’t be a nerd like jason”

percy is just under 6’0 like he JUST missed it he’s 5’11” and like half an inch and hazel tortures him for it whenever he brings up her being 5’0

(irt this post) I was actually mostly referring to thalia's post-ttc dialogue. thalia is generally fine in ttc, in fact she seems to be more even-handed when it comes to sex in ttc than she is later in the series, i.e. one of the main points of contention between thalia and zoë is that zoë hates men and thalia doesn't - specifically that zoë once tried to recruit thalia back when she was homeless with luke and annabeth, but refused to join because of luke. zoë told her this decision was stupid because luke would fail her someday

this wasn't zoë being prescient, she just thinks that men are intrinsically bad and thus luke was inevitably going to fail thalia. not because of his worldview or his hubris or his violence or anything else, but just because he's a man. to be clear I like zoë just fine but "men are evil/stupid/incompetent by default" is not the anti-sexist anti-patriarchy pro-feminist take of the century (how could any man be held responsible for his bad behavior if he was simply born a bad person?). I could elaborate on this more but it's a big topic + not the main idea of this post

after thalia has completely lost faith in luke and zoë is dying, she tells zoë that she was right about men. but zoë admits she was wrong! (we just have to ignore the unfortunate connotation that "not all men" now has in the post-#metoo era otherwise this looks really bad 😭)

unfortunately it doesn't seem like thalia internalized this. after joining the hunters, thalia has just gotten worse about gender, and now sounds a lot like zoë did before she changed her worldview. the hunters are anti-men, they didn't get along with aphrodite kids in ttc and that hasn't changed under thalia's leadership. thalia basically says here that she likes piper because piper isn't like other aphrodite kids, and this is something that tlh loooooved doing - framing piper as superior to her siblings specifically because she's not girly like the rest of them