The Freezer Burned Scientist

" this sounds oddly suspicious "

What do you mean? It's not suspicious at all! The plants are completely normal! Nothing special about them!

" if they were normal, you wouldn't have to reassure they're normal. We would just know "

Why would I ever lie?

" well, what type of plants are they? And don't just say 'the normal type'! "

...The... uhm... type that does NOT get you high...

" ARE YOU GROWING WEED!?! can I have some "

First of all, I don't want to be a drug dealer. And second of all, Prowl would probably murder me if he found out! ...Not literally, of course. I hope.

" sharing is caring, and it's not drug dealing if I'm not paying you "

" why not?! I'm responsible! You can, like, totally trust me with drugs "

Do you always beg people for drugs, or am I special?

" well when I learn someone has drugs I'll ask for some . . I don't think I beg. . "

" isn't that the point of a drug "

No, lacing is how accidental overdoses and additions happen. It could mess you up, or even worse, kill you!

" well yours aren't laced, soooooo- "

...If I give you weed... will you promise not to get it off the street?

" uhh probably. I'm kinda paralyzed right now anyway so like yeah "

" NO! NO DONT TELL HIM! I'm not just asking random people- I haven't actually asked anyone in a while! I'm asking you! "

" I'm perfectly fine! The frame rebuild just left me a bit paralyzed. "

I said you're going to wait. No ifs, ands, or buts. Come back to me when you're fully recovered.

I was informed I should check in on this conversation?

Ohhh h-hello, Ultra Magnus! No, there's nothing to see here. Nope. Nothing at all.

Are you certain? I believe I heard talk of illegal activity involving the two of you.

Hm. What are those plants over there?

They're... totally normal plants... sir...

I do not believe that “totally normal” is a species name

Mmhm. And if I were to ask, say, Perceptor or Ratchet about this, they would concur?

Well they might not have heard of it... As I said, it's very rare.

You think Perceptor, walking talking dictionary on tracks Perceptor, wouldn’t know this plant?

The Cybertronian database on Earth flora is incomplete! I'm sure there are things that even Perceptor is unaware of!

And what are the properties of this “totally normal” earth flora

Uhm... no special properties to take note of. None at all.

" this sounds oddly suspicious "

What do you mean? It's not suspicious at all! The plants are completely normal! Nothing special about them!

" if they were normal, you wouldn't have to reassure they're normal. We would just know "

Why would I ever lie?

" well, what type of plants are they? And don't just say 'the normal type'! "

...The... uhm... type that does NOT get you high...

" ARE YOU GROWING WEED!?! can I have some "

First of all, I don't want to be a drug dealer. And second of all, Prowl would probably murder me if he found out! ...Not literally, of course. I hope.

" sharing is caring, and it's not drug dealing if I'm not paying you "

" why not?! I'm responsible! You can, like, totally trust me with drugs "

Do you always beg people for drugs, or am I special?

" well when I learn someone has drugs I'll ask for some . . I don't think I beg. . "

" isn't that the point of a drug "

No, lacing is how accidental overdoses and additions happen. It could mess you up, or even worse, kill you!

" well yours aren't laced, soooooo- "

...If I give you weed... will you promise not to get it off the street?

" uhh probably. I'm kinda paralyzed right now anyway so like yeah "

" NO! NO DONT TELL HIM! I'm not just asking random people- I haven't actually asked anyone in a while! I'm asking you! "

" I'm perfectly fine! The frame rebuild just left me a bit paralyzed. "

I said you're going to wait. No ifs, ands, or buts. Come back to me when you're fully recovered.

I was informed I should check in on this conversation?

Ohhh h-hello, Ultra Magnus! No, there's nothing to see here. Nope. Nothing at all.

Are you certain? I believe I heard talk of illegal activity involving the two of you.

Hm. What are those plants over there?

They're... totally normal plants... sir...

I do not believe that “totally normal” is a species name

Mmhm. And if I were to ask, say, Perceptor or Ratchet about this, they would concur?

Well they might not have heard of it... As I said, it's very rare.

You think Perceptor, walking talking dictionary on tracks Perceptor, wouldn’t know this plant?

The Cybertronian database on Earth flora is incomplete! I'm sure there are things that even Perceptor is unaware of!

" this sounds oddly suspicious "

What do you mean? It's not suspicious at all! The plants are completely normal! Nothing special about them!

" if they were normal, you wouldn't have to reassure they're normal. We would just know "

Why would I ever lie?

" well, what type of plants are they? And don't just say 'the normal type'! "

...The... uhm... type that does NOT get you high...

" ARE YOU GROWING WEED!?! can I have some "

First of all, I don't want to be a drug dealer. And second of all, Prowl would probably murder me if he found out! ...Not literally, of course. I hope.

" sharing is caring, and it's not drug dealing if I'm not paying you "

" why not?! I'm responsible! You can, like, totally trust me with drugs "

Do you always beg people for drugs, or am I special?

" well when I learn someone has drugs I'll ask for some . . I don't think I beg. . "

" isn't that the point of a drug "

No, lacing is how accidental overdoses and additions happen. It could mess you up, or even worse, kill you!

" well yours aren't laced, soooooo- "

...If I give you weed... will you promise not to get it off the street?

" uhh probably. I'm kinda paralyzed right now anyway so like yeah "

" NO! NO DONT TELL HIM! I'm not just asking random people- I haven't actually asked anyone in a while! I'm asking you! "

" I'm perfectly fine! The frame rebuild just left me a bit paralyzed. "

I said you're going to wait. No ifs, ands, or buts. Come back to me when you're fully recovered.

I was informed I should check in on this conversation?

Ohhh h-hello, Ultra Magnus! No, there's nothing to see here. Nope. Nothing at all.

Are you certain? I believe I heard talk of illegal activity involving the two of you.

Hm. What are those plants over there?

They're... totally normal plants... sir...

I do not believe that “totally normal” is a species name

Mmhm. And if I were to ask, say, Perceptor or Ratchet about this, they would concur?

Well they might not have heard of it... As I said, it's very rare.

" this sounds oddly suspicious "

What do you mean? It's not suspicious at all! The plants are completely normal! Nothing special about them!

" if they were normal, you wouldn't have to reassure they're normal. We would just know "

Why would I ever lie?

" well, what type of plants are they? And don't just say 'the normal type'! "

...The... uhm... type that does NOT get you high...

" ARE YOU GROWING WEED!?! can I have some "

First of all, I don't want to be a drug dealer. And second of all, Prowl would probably murder me if he found out! ...Not literally, of course. I hope.

" sharing is caring, and it's not drug dealing if I'm not paying you "

" why not?! I'm responsible! You can, like, totally trust me with drugs "

Do you always beg people for drugs, or am I special?

" well when I learn someone has drugs I'll ask for some . . I don't think I beg. . "

" isn't that the point of a drug "

No, lacing is how accidental overdoses and additions happen. It could mess you up, or even worse, kill you!

" well yours aren't laced, soooooo- "

...If I give you weed... will you promise not to get it off the street?

" uhh probably. I'm kinda paralyzed right now anyway so like yeah "

" NO! NO DONT TELL HIM! I'm not just asking random people- I haven't actually asked anyone in a while! I'm asking you! "

" I'm perfectly fine! The frame rebuild just left me a bit paralyzed. "

I said you're going to wait. No ifs, ands, or buts. Come back to me when you're fully recovered.

I was informed I should check in on this conversation?

Ohhh h-hello, Ultra Magnus! No, there's nothing to see here. Nope. Nothing at all.

Are you certain? I believe I heard talk of illegal activity involving the two of you.

@prowl-official

Where is the weed?

...It's in my hab suite...

Please hand it over.

I'll go get it...

Thank you.

I will let you off with a warning. Do not continue to do this.

Thank you, sir.

" this sounds oddly suspicious "

What do you mean? It's not suspicious at all! The plants are completely normal! Nothing special about them!

" if they were normal, you wouldn't have to reassure they're normal. We would just know "

Why would I ever lie?

" well, what type of plants are they? And don't just say 'the normal type'! "

...The... uhm... type that does NOT get you high...

" ARE YOU GROWING WEED!?! can I have some "

First of all, I don't want to be a drug dealer. And second of all, Prowl would probably murder me if he found out! ...Not literally, of course. I hope.

" sharing is caring, and it's not drug dealing if I'm not paying you "

" why not?! I'm responsible! You can, like, totally trust me with drugs "

Do you always beg people for drugs, or am I special?

" well when I learn someone has drugs I'll ask for some . . I don't think I beg. . "

" isn't that the point of a drug "

No, lacing is how accidental overdoses and additions happen. It could mess you up, or even worse, kill you!

" well yours aren't laced, soooooo- "

...If I give you weed... will you promise not to get it off the street?

" uhh probably. I'm kinda paralyzed right now anyway so like yeah "

" NO! NO DONT TELL HIM! I'm not just asking random people- I haven't actually asked anyone in a while! I'm asking you! "

" I'm perfectly fine! The frame rebuild just left me a bit paralyzed. "

I said you're going to wait. No ifs, ands, or buts. Come back to me when you're fully recovered.

I was informed I should check in on this conversation?

Ohhh h-hello, Ultra Magnus! No, there's nothing to see here. Nope. Nothing at all.

Are you certain? I believe I heard talk of illegal activity involving the two of you.

Hm. What are those plants over there?

They're... totally normal plants... sir...

I do not believe that “totally normal” is a species name

" this sounds oddly suspicious "

What do you mean? It's not suspicious at all! The plants are completely normal! Nothing special about them!

" if they were normal, you wouldn't have to reassure they're normal. We would just know "

Why would I ever lie?

" well, what type of plants are they? And don't just say 'the normal type'! "

...The... uhm... type that does NOT get you high...

" ARE YOU GROWING WEED!?! can I have some "

First of all, I don't want to be a drug dealer. And second of all, Prowl would probably murder me if he found out! ...Not literally, of course. I hope.

" sharing is caring, and it's not drug dealing if I'm not paying you "

" why not?! I'm responsible! You can, like, totally trust me with drugs "

Do you always beg people for drugs, or am I special?

" well when I learn someone has drugs I'll ask for some . . I don't think I beg. . "

" isn't that the point of a drug "

No, lacing is how accidental overdoses and additions happen. It could mess you up, or even worse, kill you!

" well yours aren't laced, soooooo- "

...If I give you weed... will you promise not to get it off the street?

" uhh probably. I'm kinda paralyzed right now anyway so like yeah "

" NO! NO DONT TELL HIM! I'm not just asking random people- I haven't actually asked anyone in a while! I'm asking you! "

" I'm perfectly fine! The frame rebuild just left me a bit paralyzed. "

I said you're going to wait. No ifs, ands, or buts. Come back to me when you're fully recovered.

I was informed I should check in on this conversation?

Ohhh h-hello, Ultra Magnus! No, there's nothing to see here. Nope. Nothing at all.

Are you certain? I believe I heard talk of illegal activity involving the two of you.

Hm. What are those plants over there?

They're... totally normal plants... sir...

" this sounds oddly suspicious "

What do you mean? It's not suspicious at all! The plants are completely normal! Nothing special about them!

" if they were normal, you wouldn't have to reassure they're normal. We would just know "

Why would I ever lie?

" well, what type of plants are they? And don't just say 'the normal type'! "

...The... uhm... type that does NOT get you high...

" ARE YOU GROWING WEED!?! can I have some "

First of all, I don't want to be a drug dealer. And second of all, Prowl would probably murder me if he found out! ...Not literally, of course. I hope.

" sharing is caring, and it's not drug dealing if I'm not paying you "

" why not?! I'm responsible! You can, like, totally trust me with drugs "

Do you always beg people for drugs, or am I special?

" well when I learn someone has drugs I'll ask for some . . I don't think I beg. . "

" isn't that the point of a drug "

No, lacing is how accidental overdoses and additions happen. It could mess you up, or even worse, kill you!

" well yours aren't laced, soooooo- "

...If I give you weed... will you promise not to get it off the street?

" uhh probably. I'm kinda paralyzed right now anyway so like yeah "

" NO! NO DONT TELL HIM! I'm not just asking random people- I haven't actually asked anyone in a while! I'm asking you! "

" I'm perfectly fine! The frame rebuild just left me a bit paralyzed. "

I said you're going to wait. No ifs, ands, or buts. Come back to me when you're fully recovered.

I was informed I should check in on this conversation?

Ohhh h-hello, Ultra Magnus! No, there's nothing to see here. Nope. Nothing at all.

Are you certain? I believe I heard talk of illegal activity involving the two of you.

@prowl-official

Where is the weed?

...It's in my hab suite...

Please hand it over.

I'll go get it...

Thank you.

" this sounds oddly suspicious "

What do you mean? It's not suspicious at all! The plants are completely normal! Nothing special about them!

" if they were normal, you wouldn't have to reassure they're normal. We would just know "

Why would I ever lie?

" well, what type of plants are they? And don't just say 'the normal type'! "

...The... uhm... type that does NOT get you high...

" ARE YOU GROWING WEED!?! can I have some "

First of all, I don't want to be a drug dealer. And second of all, Prowl would probably murder me if he found out! ...Not literally, of course. I hope.

" sharing is caring, and it's not drug dealing if I'm not paying you "

" why not?! I'm responsible! You can, like, totally trust me with drugs "

Do you always beg people for drugs, or am I special?

" well when I learn someone has drugs I'll ask for some . . I don't think I beg. . "

" isn't that the point of a drug "

No, lacing is how accidental overdoses and additions happen. It could mess you up, or even worse, kill you!

" well yours aren't laced, soooooo- "

...If I give you weed... will you promise not to get it off the street?

" uhh probably. I'm kinda paralyzed right now anyway so like yeah "

" NO! NO DONT TELL HIM! I'm not just asking random people- I haven't actually asked anyone in a while! I'm asking you! "

" I'm perfectly fine! The frame rebuild just left me a bit paralyzed. "

I said you're going to wait. No ifs, ands, or buts. Come back to me when you're fully recovered.

I was informed I should check in on this conversation?

Ohhh h-hello, Ultra Magnus! No, there's nothing to see here. Nope. Nothing at all.

Are you certain? I believe I heard talk of illegal activity involving the two of you.

@prowl-official

Where is the weed?

...It's in my hab suite...

Please hand it over.

I'll go get it...

" this sounds oddly suspicious "

What do you mean? It's not suspicious at all! The plants are completely normal! Nothing special about them!

" if they were normal, you wouldn't have to reassure they're normal. We would just know "

Why would I ever lie?

" well, what type of plants are they? And don't just say 'the normal type'! "

...The... uhm... type that does NOT get you high...

" ARE YOU GROWING WEED!?! can I have some "

First of all, I don't want to be a drug dealer. And second of all, Prowl would probably murder me if he found out! ...Not literally, of course. I hope.

" sharing is caring, and it's not drug dealing if I'm not paying you "

" why not?! I'm responsible! You can, like, totally trust me with drugs "

Do you always beg people for drugs, or am I special?

" well when I learn someone has drugs I'll ask for some . . I don't think I beg. . "

" isn't that the point of a drug "

No, lacing is how accidental overdoses and additions happen. It could mess you up, or even worse, kill you!

" well yours aren't laced, soooooo- "

...If I give you weed... will you promise not to get it off the street?

" uhh probably. I'm kinda paralyzed right now anyway so like yeah "

" NO! NO DONT TELL HIM! I'm not just asking random people- I haven't actually asked anyone in a while! I'm asking you! "

" I'm perfectly fine! The frame rebuild just left me a bit paralyzed. "

I said you're going to wait. No ifs, ands, or buts. Come back to me when you're fully recovered.

I was informed I should check in on this conversation?

Ohhh h-hello, Ultra Magnus! No, there's nothing to see here. Nope. Nothing at all.

Are you certain? I believe I heard talk of illegal activity involving the two of you.

@prowl-official

Where is the weed?

...It's in my hab suite...

" this sounds oddly suspicious "

What do you mean? It's not suspicious at all! The plants are completely normal! Nothing special about them!

" if they were normal, you wouldn't have to reassure they're normal. We would just know "

Why would I ever lie?

" well, what type of plants are they? And don't just say 'the normal type'! "

...The... uhm... type that does NOT get you high...

" ARE YOU GROWING WEED!?! can I have some "

First of all, I don't want to be a drug dealer. And second of all, Prowl would probably murder me if he found out! ...Not literally, of course. I hope.

" sharing is caring, and it's not drug dealing if I'm not paying you "

" why not?! I'm responsible! You can, like, totally trust me with drugs "

Do you always beg people for drugs, or am I special?

" well when I learn someone has drugs I'll ask for some . . I don't think I beg. . "

" isn't that the point of a drug "

No, lacing is how accidental overdoses and additions happen. It could mess you up, or even worse, kill you!

" well yours aren't laced, soooooo- "

...If I give you weed... will you promise not to get it off the street?

" uhh probably. I'm kinda paralyzed right now anyway so like yeah "

" NO! NO DONT TELL HIM! I'm not just asking random people- I haven't actually asked anyone in a while! I'm asking you! "

" I'm perfectly fine! The frame rebuild just left me a bit paralyzed. "

I said you're going to wait. No ifs, ands, or buts. Come back to me when you're fully recovered.

I was informed I should check in on this conversation?

Ohhh h-hello, Ultra Magnus! No, there's nothing to see here. Nope. Nothing at all.

Are you certain? I believe I heard talk of illegal activity involving the two of you.

@prowl-official

I'm never giving you a rock again.

Shut the frag up

" I didn't even say anything! "

I'm dragging you down with me.

" nuh uh I still have four weeks of recovery you can't do this yet "

"Recovery" isn't going to make Prowl any less furious.

" What's your point "

" IM not the one growing WEED! "

I'm not the one encouraging illegal distribution!

" How am I encouraging it?? I'm saying I want it, I'm not telling people to go buy it! Nobody should follow the choices I make, I'm a very bad influence! "

I'm so mad.

" hi So Mad "

" this sounds oddly suspicious "

What do you mean? It's not suspicious at all! The plants are completely normal! Nothing special about them!

" if they were normal, you wouldn't have to reassure they're normal. We would just know "

Why would I ever lie?

" well, what type of plants are they? And don't just say 'the normal type'! "

...The... uhm... type that does NOT get you high...

" ARE YOU GROWING WEED!?! can I have some "

First of all, I don't want to be a drug dealer. And second of all, Prowl would probably murder me if he found out! ...Not literally, of course. I hope.

" sharing is caring, and it's not drug dealing if I'm not paying you "

" why not?! I'm responsible! You can, like, totally trust me with drugs "

Do you always beg people for drugs, or am I special?

" well when I learn someone has drugs I'll ask for some . . I don't think I beg. . "

" isn't that the point of a drug "

No, lacing is how accidental overdoses and additions happen. It could mess you up, or even worse, kill you!

" well yours aren't laced, soooooo- "

...If I give you weed... will you promise not to get it off the street?

" uhh probably. I'm kinda paralyzed right now anyway so like yeah "

" NO! NO DONT TELL HIM! I'm not just asking random people- I haven't actually asked anyone in a while! I'm asking you! "

" I'm perfectly fine! The frame rebuild just left me a bit paralyzed. "

I said you're going to wait. No ifs, ands, or buts. Come back to me when you're fully recovered.

I was informed I should check in on this conversation?

Ohhh h-hello, Ultra Magnus! No, there's nothing to see here. Nope. Nothing at all.

Are you certain? I believe I heard talk of illegal activity involving the two of you.

@prowl-official

I'm never giving you a rock again.

Shut the frag up

" I didn't even say anything! "

I'm dragging you down with me.

" nuh uh I still have four weeks of recovery you can't do this yet "

"Recovery" isn't going to make Prowl any less furious.

" What's your point "

" IM not the one growing WEED! "

I'm not the one encouraging illegal distribution!