I write sometimes.

the sign in button?

one cool thing about having an autistic dad whose special interest is underwater spearfishing is that when he catches fish he'll just call up a nearby chinese restaurant like "hi. i caught a fish. can you cook it and i'll bring my family by?" and they're like "yeah sure come on over white boy" and the fish is delicious.

it's worth adding that my mom is chinese and she always gets embarrassed by this. like she doesn't want to come to the restaurant with us. she doesn't want to be seen with the white man she caught plus the fish that her white man caught. everyone who works at the restaurant thinks my dad is awesome and compliments him + her for choosing him and we all find this very fun except for her.

[Image ID: Tumblr tags from i-put-they-hyper-in-hyperfixated reading: #give a man a fish and the chinese restaurant will eat for a day #teach a man to fish and he'll feed the chinese restaurant for his whole life /End ID]

love it when mutuals appear in my activity like omigosh hiii

and for the lady, perhaps a fking break?

in case anyone is missing the sheer beauty of this french pun, in english it says "ominous" but broken up like a separated head and body - but in french "o minous" means "oh kitties"

why is this getting notes again everyone STOP talking about white collar & rich guy shit i am a BLUE COLLAR DYKE!!!! THIS IS A JANITORIAL COMPANY!!!! i will NOT let you make this about white collar businessmen the poors are funny too ok

[ID: An edit of the Ikea logo to say "Mimikea" End ID]

Necromancer to their friend in the Mimikea parking lot: hey, you wanna see something really funny?