welcome to my Littel Funy

Oh 𝔽𝕌ℂ𝕂! You didn’t tell me you had a beast in your home. You’ve got a little goggyee. Eh- BOGGY. A poopy dog. A buppy- a little 𝐹𝑈𝐶𝐾𝐼𝑁𝐺 ƊOƐGGУ. I’ve never seen a reell dog before! We only have Lego® Dogs on Lego® Island. 𝒪𝒽! Oh FUCK! Oh fuck nooo! This red bastard’s got teeth! Sharp teethh. He’s going to tear me into little Lego® pieces. I’ve never been so scared in my life! WHAT THE FUCK this is like a jumpscare from Five Fuckers at Uncle Festers. GET ME THE  𝔽𝕌ℂ𝕂  OUT OF HERE!

Every time I think of this I have to watch it

those other guys are just roleplaying. i'm a real freak. i don't trust tapwater. i'm inbred. smoking me out is like trying to smoke out a warehouse. i get drunk off of 2 beers. i'm scared of Walmart. ever had real freak before? you will immediately feel the difference. the ride is smoother, the controls are more responsive. you've been driving shopping carts until now. are you in the right headspace to hear some shit like "batter up!" before you get fucked? i'm 5 foot 6. i don't have insurance. i'm trying to move to your state before we even enter the talking phase. i'll get a passport to fuck. you think you can have it all with a genuine freak? have it writ upon thy meagre grave. i escaped from a lab where scientists work round the clock creating artificial life- genetically bioengineered to drive your pussy insane. ready for a real freak? once you've seen the stroke you can never go back. my ears ring 24/7. all i do is train. spending a night with me is like spending a night doing the super mario 64 speedrun stair glitch. send me an email.

these are supposed to be my amazing digital thirties

we're saying hi if you want in on this

[louder than everyone] MAN I THINK IT DEPENDS!

woahhhh a floor beef clover it must be my yucky day

"it would be so good if it was good" will haunt you but "it's extremely good, except for the one or two parts which are so bad it's genuinely kind of insulting" will straight up drive you insane