shuilian

okay. which of you motherfuckers taught my vile little homunculus how to put on eyeliner

it is fucking serving.

the problem is i really do love staying up until one billion o'clock. it just cant be helped

Prev et al. (2025)

i’m like a clown that no one hired or pays

do y’all remember usernames??? from back when every fuckin website didn’t need your email phone number home address social security number just to join/sign up for something?? when you could make website-specific accounts that weren’t linked to literally anything else??? they tried to boil us like a frog slowly switching to “username/email” and then just asking for your email. but I remember. I remember usernames.

*Louis Armstrong voice* And I think to myself 😏 what the actual fuck? 😌

there r so many emojis i always stumble across something like 🗜 and i think who the HELL would ever use this emoji. and then i think abt some guy who probably works w those things all the time n hes so happy he can use this emoji. and im happy for him

can’t believe I had to read this with my own balls

You never recover from being weird in middle school

hence why we are on tumblr

people really do have such short memories about lots of things but specifically gay sex was a crime in much of the usa less than 25 years ago like i remember it and gay marriage wasn’t legalized until 11 years ago and i was a grown woman waiting to get my hair cut when i found out. on a beautiful june day!!!

tng plots are like oh an alien tickled my ear but i’m too nervous to tell my coworkers or like we have to sneak into romulan space and make friends with them. ds9 plots are TODAY WE’RE USING A STOLEN RUNABOUT TO SMUGGLE TWELVE BAJORAN PRISONERS OF WAR OUT OF A CONCENTRATION CAMP AND MY COMMANDING OFFICER LETS ME BECAUSE I’M A BUDDHIST LESBIAN

It's never too late to escape from the secret underground government facility you were raised and go on a telekinetic rampage across the city before mysteriously disappearing into the woods

One of the best things about being a writer is thinking of something small you can add to your work that’s just. Devastating. Like you’re sitting there going. Oh. That would be diabolical. People would get really riled up about that. Exquisite. Let’s do it.

do you ever write a post and wish there was a way it could only be read by the people you know won't take it the wrong way