man i love shrimp

all yall make jokes about couples and their nonromantic third wheel having fun together, but im the one getting treated to food tonight by the couple im nonromantically third wheeling. you wish you were me

I'm sorry I read this as "necromantic third wheel" and went on a very rapid powerful imagination adventure. hello lovebirds I'm the skeleton here for breadsticks

guy on a work call just accidentally said “have a nice freak-end” instead of weekend and now i desperately want that to be the new meme. have a nice freakend everybody

thankful for bread and butter and garlic #thankful

yummyummyummyummyummy yummy for piggy

hey, don't cry. fictional character in dire & perilous situations. ok?

sometimes when i read something extremely good i can hardly stand to read more than two or three sentences at a time because i get so excited every other line that it's almost physically exhausting to get through

reblog to give a plushie to the person you reblogged this from

girl who doesn't know anything: hi I'm Guessica

girl who knows everything: Hi im Knowlly

girl who knows some things: hi im nuancica

Girl who rally doesn't know anything: Hi! Im um.. uh. Ummm

A trope that gets to me: 'guard dog' character and their partner who are both fully aware of it and honestly don't care/kind of like it. Someone says "call your guard dog off" and their partner does call them off. That person, their 'guard dog', is someone who is unreservedly, irrefutably loyal to them. Someone undoubtedly dangerous who is willing to kill, to maim, to obey, simply because of their love for one another. There's no manipulation involved— it is loyalty, brutal, dogged loyalty. And it goes both ways.