A shot of Chinaco

how dare they go for bob when thomas kinkade is RIGHT THERE

I am old enough to remember when the ammosexual mouth-breathers of the MAGA multiverse declared holy war on Bud Light. They shot it. They blowtorched it. They ran it over with the family F-150. They dry-humped it, slapped its ass, and called it cousin. Kid Rock took a machine gun to a pallet of it like he was auditioning for John Wick 5: The Dipshit Awakens. And why? ONE can. ONE. COMMEMORATIVE. CAN. For one trans influencer. Not a six-pack. Not a rainbow tankard forged in the fires of Mount Woke. One can, and these donkey-brained shidiots spent their insulin money buying beer just to murder it because they swore drinking it would turn you gay. Turn you trans. Like it came with a gender-settings menu printed on the back of the can. And now? Now that same beer is plastered across the cage at the eightieth-birthday gladiator games of Emperor Trumpolini Short-Sword the Orange. Commode-us the Incontinent. The Sun-Downing Sovereign of the Diaper Dynasty.

Any scientist, or you know, a kid who paid attention in Chem 101, could have told this administration what would happen.

the beach that. makes you dead

Yeah, bro in a Pink Floyd t-shirt, that girl in the Nirvana hoodie wasn’t born when Nevermind was released. But you were SEVEN when The Wall came out, and you only knew the chorus of one song you thought was about Miss Clark making you learn silent e. You did not “get” Pink Floyd in 1979, and if you heard Ummagumma you would have cried. Fuck off and let kids like old stuff too.

Best comment I just saw "Helen of Troy was perfectly cast, because all these men are fighting about her."

June 14th is Flag Day