USB Rat King

the ubiquity of "what you don't swallow can't poison you" as a belief among MRE youtubers genuinely seems to indicate a failure of education. I feel like I'm watching cats eat plastic

when the pâté clicks like ghoul meat and he still goes for a little taste <<<

Would you eat something called 'Cream of Burger' soup?

Yeah probably but that's because I'm a piece of shit

28 is the oldest you can get in your 20s. 29 is crazy young like leave them alone weirdo. 30 is old 31 is super young

Gay Winston from Overwatch: Excuse me for... being gay

He doesn't need a fucking excuse honey that's the point of PRIDE Winston !!!!

PROUD Gay Winston: Did somebody say... penis?

you want to be mommy’s adjective noun, don’t you, pet name? you want to verb and verb for mommy like a good gender

what world do people imagine their fursonae exist inside of. I love how undefined it is. some people are like "this is my sona Hryàxe, a hybrid dragon with ice powers who has been alive through three astral ages and toppled many kingdoms of men" and someone else is like "this is my sona he's an arctic fox named blurt and hes a barista in Toronto who loves to play mahjong." And then blurt and hryàxe are lovingly having sex on a tropical beach somewhere. and I'm like how'd they get to the beach

ocd will have me thinking i cant text "here now if you wanna head over" because i sound like blowjob mario with a walkie talkie

nobody thinks this way, you are a broken person

Handler needs you to play magic the gathering competitive elder dragon highlander okay hound? You be a sweet little mutt for me and go to edhtop16.com, and pick your favourite okay? If you don’t want to think, any of the decks with “Tymna the Weaver” will be good for you to learn with. She’s just like your mech, except instead of brutalising rebels she generates card advantage and instead of your giant mech you get to run “Lotho, Corrupt Sheriff”, my obedient pup. Once you’ve got that just look up some of the bracket 5 decklists on Moxfield and we can get you started okay? If you do well and get at least a draw against the other hounds you’ll get boot time okay? And if you win- hey where are you going what do you mean you’re redding its not that bad i swear come on at least try pauper-

be a good girl and kneel in front of mommy so i can put on your vegan 3d printed pleather torture collar or else you'll be whipped with mommys unsanded small business glitter resin pour flogging cane