i dont write anymore but pls read my stuff

This is for Sami’s @evansweaters​ 2K writing challenge! This was due forever ago but life unfortunately got in the way. However!!! I still wanted to finish it and share it, so I’m sorry it took me so long. I stole the title of this story from the Chris Evans movie of the same title, but the plot lines are not the same. Here’s 23 Google Doc pages of I don’t know what.

Prompt: fake dating AU + “cool girl” by Tove Lo

You’re angry. No, you’re furious. Furious because while he’s known you haven’t liked this whole PR relationship stunt he’s been pulling with his ‘friend’, he still chose to spend his self-isolation with her and not you, his girlfriend of three years.

You’re upset. No, you’re devastated. Devastated because while he’s filming live streams with her and selling their bullshit love story, you’re all alone in your shared condo in Toronto, struggling to grip onto what little sanity you have left.

Maybe it wouldn’t hurt so much if you weren’t isolated alone; if you had a friend or someone else at the condo with you. But you don’t and your immune system is weak as shit and you can’t afford to risk leaving the house. You haven’t gone outside in almost nine days. Sure, you’ve sat on the balcony for a little, reading your book or just getting some air, but there’s only so much freedom the little strip of pavement gets you.

You don’t complain about it, though. You know you’re lucky enough to be able to walk about on the terrace and have a large space to keep you occupied with, but being alone is still alone and it’s lonely. It might only be nine days since you left the apartment, but it’s been almost three weeks since you last felt Shawn in your presence.

Working from home was proven difficult on the first day of quarantine. You couldn’t focus or get in the mood to do anything and the longer you looked at the list of unopened emails, the worse you felt. You’ve FaceTime’d Shawn twice since he’s been with her in Malibu. Twice. And it’s not like he doesn’t have time. You’re all in quarantine, what else would he be doing?

You’ve let your mind run to some impossible scenarios. Is he sleeping with her on the side? Are they getting closer and he’s forgetting about you? Is he beginning to delve too deep in this PR relationship that he’s starting to possibly believe it? The latter is what’s been keeping you up at night. That and not having his arms around you.

You’ve been trying to contact him all day but your calls are ringing through to voicemail and your texts are going unread. You’ve seen the daily ‘pap shots’ of them hand-in-hand as they waltz through the silent street, even laughed at that video of the one woman chewing them out for being irresponsible.

It’s not until you’re tucked up on his side of the bed with his pillow cuddled to your chest that he calls you back. You wipe your stray tears before answering the call. He can’t see you at first. The bedroom is dark because you switched out the lights and closed the curtains, but he can just make out your nose and eyes peering out of the top of your blanket.

A/N: What is this? I have finished something? Me?? posting?? A FIC? WHAT? Is the world actually ending!?!? I think I’m funny but I’m not, clearly. Glad to be out of my writing rot tho aha. Hope you guys like this one!

Pairing: Tom Holland x Singer!Reader

Summary: You get a sweet but very extra surprise on your birthday nearing the end of your show.

Warnings: Fluff and my usual typos

Word Count: 5.5k+

Masterlist in Bio

-:-:-:-:-

The sound of your phone just going off uncontrollably was what woke you up, and you were completely sure that it wasn’t your alarm.

You squint your eyes at the bright glare of the screen, a huge contrast to your still dim hotel room. You literally had just woken up hence why the curtains aren’t open yet, it’s still a bit too early after all.

Flicking the ringer on silent, birthday greetings and messages from friends and families were still flooding through, your phone now vibrating instead of your loud ringtone, giving your ears a break.

As you read through and responded to all of them, you couldn’t help but feel a little down after you realized you haven’t seen his name yet.

Of course you feel grateful for all the sweet messages everyone has sent you, your heart is melting from all the love. But there’s that slight disheartened feeling that you can’t seem to shake, slight worry that your boyfriend might have forgotten about your birthday.

Summary:  The last chapter of As It Was, told from your perspective.   

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader, Bucky Barnes x Reader

A/N:  Thank you for all your support! This is, so far, my favorite (mini) series I’ve ever written. I’m so glad to have done it. I hope you liked it as much as I did!! 5.2k word count. Angst. Healing. A lot of Bucky love. 

You haven’t always been soft.

It used to be hard and fast, scorched and salted earth, with your troublesome heart throwing you headfirst into every fight. In the past, your recklessness was a running joke with the team after they lost you in Alaska and upon the third hour of searching, Steve and Bucky came upon a burning semi with you standing nearby, shuddering in the polar night.

They had rushed forward, grabbed the back of your suit and tore you from the truck before it could explode. In-between clipped and frozen breaths, you screamed, It’s dark as shit! And cold! I had to set that thing on fire! You found me, didn’t you?!

Did you have to? Bucky rolled his eyes as the vehicle burst apart, blazing shrapnel whizzing through the black, or did you want to?

Steve snickered, pulled you in for a sloppy kiss. Baby, you’re a mess.

It used to be a bruising kind of love, raw and open, and all for Steve. He saw and knew every facet of you from every angle, even the ones you hid away. You let him dig inside of your rib cage, wrap himself around your heart, and sleep in your blood until you couldn’t untangle which part was you and which part was him.

authors fave - ♤

Shawn Mendes:

Hold On ♤

{part 1} {part 2} {part 3} 

When Shawn finds out that you got into a car accident, he’s too stressed to do anything but write a song. The only thing that calms his nerves, other than you.

Are The Girls Here?

At one of Shawn’s Q&A’s, the fans seem to be more interested in you and Aaliyah than they are Shawn.

High School Sweethearts

What happens when Shawn sheds light on your secret long term relationship?

Like A Baby

You fall asleep at a venue.

Tattoos ♤♤

{part 1} {part 2} {part 3} {part 4} {part 5}

A series about tattoos and stuff

Recording ♤

Dad!Shawn, need I say more?

My Girl

Interview fluff

Affair

Short funny/fluffy blurb

Ringtone

Shawn coming home from tour fluff

She Loves Me 

You and Shawn’s relationship solely through Aaliyah’s eyes.

Straight Outta Surgery

Shawn’s high after his surgery, and, in Aaliyah’s wise words, it’s very interesting.  

“Ha! Joke’s on you! My whole life is a mess!” ♤

Prompt list blurb

Lack of Consistency

An anon sent me this wonderful prompt and I just had to write it! “What do you mean this lacks consistency? I’m always right there when you need me, isn’t that enough? What more could you possibly want?” 

Costume Party

You sass your ex (sorta) at a costume party and Shawn is impressed. 

She Loves Me Not

{part 1} [discontinued until further notice]

Cinder-Shawn? ♤

{part 1} {part 2} {part 3} {part 4}

Fight me?

fluffy Nurse!Shawn au

Interrogation 

scary liyah but like in a cute way

Daddy, I Got A Boyfriend! ♤

{Epilogue A} {Epilogue B} 

fluffiest shit I’ve ever written…

Just A Crush

You tell Shawn about your crush on him, but he just doesn’t feel the same.

Campus Surprise ♤

Shawn surprises you on campus a day after an incident occurs.

Tarot Reading ♤

You offer Shawn a tarot reading.

Lightbulbs

Why are you always horny? I have things to do too, you know?

Right Here

You end up cancelling a family outing, but Shawn makes it up to your daughter.

That’s My Fiancé!

Fluffy one shot

idk what to name this

the shittiest thing ive ever written pls don’t read

Pinky Promise ♤

Shawn abides by his promise, no matter how embarrassing.

Movies Don’t Need To End

Your friend sneaks you into Shawn’s studio at a party, but you forget to delete the evidence.

Met Gala ♤

the title’s pretty self explanatory

Cast

Shawn gets nervous at a casting call.

Proud of You ♤

Shawn’s proud of his singer!gf. short blurb, not much to it.

Behind the Scenes & pt. 2 ♤

you’re with Shawn while filming the mv for señorita

Jealous of Aladdin ♤

Shawn gets jealous of reader’s costar on the set of aladdin. (arab!reader)

Last Name

You and Shawn discuss sharing a last name.

Best Friend’s Brother & pt. 2

your best friend bails on your movie night, so you end up going with her brother.

Lunch Time

your inner clock is a bit ahead of schedule and Shawn joins in on the fun. written for @mendesftoakley because i love her.

Father’s Day

father’s day was always hard for you and your daughter, until Shawn came along.

Baby

a fic about you watching baby driver with shawn

Social Media AU’s/Photosets:

Through her ‘Eyes’

You and Shawn’s relationship through Aaliyah’s ‘eyes’.

Through Your ‘Eyes’

On Tour & Birthday Boy

Through His ‘Eyes’

On Vacation

“Stop taking pictures of me yn!” A Mendes Siblings Series

{part 1 - Shawn & Aaliyah} & {part 2 - Aaliyah} & {part 3 - Shawn} & {part 4 - Shawn & Aaliyah}

Hands On Tour

European Leg: {part 1} & {part 2} 

Pic Creds: Aaliyah

{part 1} &  {part 2} & {part 3}

Doctor Who:

Alpha Centauri ♤

His Kiss, The Riot

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Synopsis: one accidental kiss leads to many more

Masterlist

“Sit down, mon cheri. Let me have a look at your tresses.” You instructed May in a poor french accent as she took a seat in front of the mirror. You plugged in the curling iron while you waited for her to sit.

“You should probably have a look at a French textbook.” She commented as you began to brush out her hair.

“Oh hush.” You replied, wrapping a strand of her hair around the iron.

“Hey guys. I’m heading to my internship.” Peter announced as he came into the bathroom. You made eye contact in the mirror and he wiggled his eyebrows as you bite back a smile.

“Okay. Be safe.” May said as she combed through one of the curls you had made.

“Use protection.” You quipped as you curled another strand of Mays hair.

Summary: Shawn gets drunk at Brian’s birthday party and you take him home, but not without him getting a little goofy on you. [drinking] [established relationship] [drunk shenanigans]

Word Count: 1.6k

|Masterlist In Bio|

Dealing with drunk Shawn is always a bit of a headache, but depending on what kind of drunk, it’s more or less bearable. Tonight it’s tequila drunk. That means forgetful, clingy and emotional. It’s Brian’s birthday and you’re all out at a club in downtown Toronto. Drinks have been flowing all night, partying and rowdiness is at an all time high and you are sober as can be. Why? Because you’re pregnant, still very early, only two months, but pregnant nonetheless.

Initially Shawn wasn’t going to drink. He said he wanted to have a few beers and just hang out with the guys. Then one friend after another began buying rounds of shots, and Shawn being the fun loving guy he is, took said shots. He did check in with you though, asked if you were alright with him getting fucked up with Brian for the night. Of course you were fine with it. It’s his best friend’s birthday, a once a year type of thing. No problem. Until the tequila rounds started flowing.

hey! i’ve definitely struggled with that idea–– and it comes and goes, weighing positives and negatives. first, i gotta say that making reader-inserts (RPF) doesn’t make YOU a good or bad person. fantasy and fan-made works are natural, and common response to seeing /something/ that resonates with you. i think it’s very, very special when you make that kind of connection outside of yourself, and your world.

BUT

never forget that it is YOUR expression/indulgence, and NOT a reality for the celebrity/person you decide to fixate on, or even the people around you. not everyone will understand your passion, expression, or inspiration; and that’s fine. that’s a fact of life, and i think that fanfiction/fanart/fanmade media is ultimately very personal so i would be wary of what you share with who. and in a the same vein, i think it IS uncomfortable/wrong to share these imaginations with the person themselves. they do NOT need to be tagged in self-indulgent work, they do not need to be made aware of every piece of media that comes out of their performance. if they wanted to look for it, they can. but that being said, i would like to caution ya’ll about where you post things. just don’t put it in their face, you know? it is weird. 

reader-insert, rpf, fanfiction, are made by you for you. that’s it. and that’s okay. i think there are “better” and “worse” ways to write about it, but that’s a moral thing on the writer and reader. living in 2020, i prefer things that focus on how “X”-actor makes “the reader” feel, instead of manipulating “X” to fit a specific role (that they have not outwardly portrayed). and ya know, stay away from defaming them, perpetuating rumors, and interferring with their actual livelihood  & physical/mental health.

original performances, fantasy and art ARE ways to cope with reality and it is not the same for everyone. that’s how i rationalize it all best. hope you’re doing well 🌿