Share Your Sorrow

Kindly, Kev

Motion Graphics extracted the soundtrack from the video documentation of Kevin Bewersdorf's "Internet As Poetry" reading at Issue Project Room (July 2, 2014), cleaned it and submitted it to Share Your Sorrow. Enjoy

Kevin Bewersdorf, Static Jewel, 2013 (?). From the lost "Room 6" of Treasure Hall of the Misterious Monk. Shared by Nick H.

Now these relics are available again here. Enjoy!

This is not about Santa Claus tonight. Poems about the Internet, that's the subject that Michael suggested. I had a lot of poems about the Internet that I've written, and I think I have something to share. Some of it is freestyle, it's a poem -- talking, freestyle talking. I'm just going to be talking, I'm not prepared. Some, I have a prepared thing to say -- that's like the "tracks", do the track. The first track, the poem is called "Threading Silk", and it's about a movement that I learned that's called threading silk, but it's also about the wheel that's spinning on the Internet, and what is happening. *** Human fingers May stumble upon you Well that never runs dry Your powers pump In towers underground And it is no wonder that you are tapped Dense clouds [swarm?] above this silk of the heart. When one strand is pulled, the whole web trembles, spreading [unspool?] Are these verses too flowery for you? Okay, we can just go on with our lives. Each one of us thread [seeing colors?] This one's for the workers Touching raw material in silk factory With good intention may they [gouge?] soft fabric to the door of the palace I'll now perform the threading silk movement. [Does movement] *** I'm gonna do a little freestyle now, and this is going to be a freestyle about the web and the net. The "web" and the "net", two words that people are using a lot to talk about the internet, very important when people are talking about it. What's the difference between the web and the net? Same thing? Different things? Not clear. Are they interchangable? Chuang Tzu, the Taoist philosopher, said, "small knowledge divides the one into many, great knowledge sees the many as one." So this is a small-knowledge poem because I'm dividing the net and the web in the poem. But I need three to do it, not just two, not two poles, three, and these are the three I will talk about: The web is like vapor, and information is like water, and the Internet is ice. Ice is a crystal, and the Internet is a crystal, and you can't talk about the Internet, you have to talk about the crystal. That's the shape of it, and it multiplies, the crystal multiplies without rest. You go on the Internet, nothing rests, pretty much. The multiplying crystal. Fast, and hard, too; it's very hard on the Internet. Sharp angles, all those chips and stuff. But you need the soft too, you need to soften the sharpness. How do you do it? All sides at once of the crystal, you can't do it. You have to soften the crystal. So, you go on the web! I like the hard, too. Hard is amazing, the crystal room is amazing, that's why people think the Internet is so amazing. So fast, it has pressure, so much pressure. Socially, it could be bad, because it's peer pressure. I don't know if you've ever been warned about this when you were in school, people say to watch out for the peer pressure. And if you go on the Internet, there's going to be pressure because that's the speed of it. On the web, you relax, you just relax. No pressure. What is the web? Round and soft spiral, A continuous, round spiral. That's the updates. Moving like vapor. Catch the vapor, it's an ice body. Ice is all-connected. You remove the body, and only the connections are there. I want to see how long ago people were connected, so I go back, and I think about women grinding corn. A long time ago, women grinding corn. How were they connected? They were gossiping, and the gossip was an irresistible web. Long before the Internet, the women grinding corn were connected. And they relaxed when they were grinding corn, they were very relaxed, moving softly, grinding corn, all day long. When I feel something critical, that means something hard coming through. Hardening is okay, because that's what happens when things grow, they get harder. And that's why the Internet is very adult, because the hardening is an adult, you harden into an identity, especially on the Internet, our identity, it's hard. And what is the proof that the Internet is adult and hard? Because a baby can't use it. You ever see a baby use the Internet? A baby can't do it. And why can't the baby use the Internet? The baby's perfect. A baby doesn't learn by Wikipedia. The baby is on the web. Besides the women grinding corn, you see the baby connect to the web. So: soft and hard. That's the freestyle here -- the issue, in the Issue Project, soft and hard. One's the expansion -- that's the Internet, expanding up, expanding up, expanding up. And you have to have the contraction -- moving towards the web is contracting, and it's pulsing. The last thing I have to say about this, for all of us: the Internet and the web are in love with each other, and that's how they're transforming into each other. Open heart naming vapor, there is no name for vapor. No name for vapor. Vapor is separate from the earth. And that's why the [?] skywriters come and do their work. This is a poem, this is a track called "Who is using the Internet?" This is a list of different people, going through a list of people that I see might be using the Internet. The point is to open my heart to all of them. *** "Who is using the Internet?" Who is using the Internet? In my eyes, the sun is. Dragon dorks. Shark dorks. Los Angeles Latinas. Mystical comedians. Cable guys. Credit card registrants. Grown men in developing countries. Dream weavers. Translators. Native peoples. Inverse porn stars. Someone typing randomly. The descendants of Adam and Eve. Adam Sandler, and his descendants. Cranky flowershop owners. Anyone who's seen the sun. The employed. The powerfully obsessed. The politically ejaculating. Those committing heinous crimes, As well as the dying, Their caregivers, Your parents And your lover. Paleface, my heart goes out to you. *** "Amazon" Amazon lies just through the dark Like frogs and bugs upon your great data stream. You are the main stream Of the dark ocean at the end of all rivers where space begins. Water, world, woman. Calling for [her?] star, Get into my basket. I dip into the water, Watch, continue onwards as a raft, Good guides [?] around us. Amazon, jungle of arrows, All arrows arriving at the door, Like water into the ground. *** Maybe I'll do another little freestyle here about trains? I ride the train a lot in New York, I really like the train. You know, the train, it's also a search engine. And you know who's the find engine? You are. [laughs]. You are the train, you have to find your station. So. The train is a search engine. But you are the find engine because you, you're the one who can lose the way, so. You have to feel found at your station. The train, it rides the rails, but it can't lose the way. It's rapid transit. You have to go fast. And you're at the mercy of the train. The train is progress; you're at the mercy of progress. I've seen this crazy thing that kids do on Youtube, and it's called "train surfing". And they ride outside the train! They just grab on and they ride outside of it. Not inside the train, outside the train. It's crazy! People do that. And I saw, on an advertisement in the train, that was encouraging people -- it was an MTA advertisement, encouraging people to ride inside the train, and not outside the train. And it had a poem on it. I liked the poem very much. And the poem said: Surf the web, not the train! The only safe ride is a ride inside. And I agree with that. *** Face to face with unlimited minutes. I'm blowing up. I live in an explosion. My [mom?] is in all directions. My faith I follow [?] through a tunnel, And I do not dare resist the totally, miraculously normal. *** "Great speeches" The blood of men rained down like fire, 5,000 years ago Slaves revolting before maps Pursued into the wilderness Or squatting in a canyon, eating from bowls On the other side of the mountain, 10,000 arguments are waiting in the comments. Now, in the great slave rebellion of 2014 I watch in my own battlefield As, standing on a rock, in the center of all warriors, The leader of the slaves gives a great speech That cannot be found on Google, But is planted in human hearts forever. I'm watching now, the speech. *** I log warrior poems, [?] Seeing warriors is like a wound, and it won't heal, you just keep seeing warriors. You're finding war, but there is no war. It hurts a lot. But connected to the warrior, because I've written a lot of poems about the warrior, it's a way of doing pain management. It's a pain management skill. [?] Those pains, they can be deleted. Or you're recycling them in the recycling bin. So this is an instructional, how to delete the warrior pain. *** Rushing, rushing in, rushing out, and standing still. Shimmer, flow, overexposure, Breaking the cloud of chariots. (Delete from the weight upon your heart.) Haunted by emails -- (Delete from the weight upon your heart.) Having a wonderful time -- (Delete from the weight upon your heart.) [Crazed as two mirror of space?] Live life awakening access All good gods have names Live life awakening access Off the deep end Live life awakening access Delete from the weight upon your heart Live life awakening access How do you delete from the weight upon your heart? It's easy. Step one: You look into your heart. You see the weight. You see the recycling bin. You grab the weight. You go over to the recycling bin. And you delete from the weight upon your heart. And you're light-hearted. How do you live life awakening access? It's easy. Step one. Know the address. You look into the darkness, And you keep a connection. *** "Mission statement" Brain fires, release the heat The only thing above your head for that heat to cook is empty space. My name is Kev I am the CEO of Orange Computers and I am in the business of bringing the Tao and storing the heat. I do my business below the diaphragm and above the anus In the corporate office of Orange Computers. One employee working the bellows warms the whole headquarters. With basement heat. As the heat rises from its point in the foundation, The fire of upward mobility like the dragon [world of the nether?] Rocking through the glowing rectangles of flaming stars Reaches the newsroom of the brain Where the grains are leaping off the field And rivers of salmon are flowing stricken [and?] [fruits?] are issued identification cards High achievers, sticking together in the [hell of a] full calendar I know you're looking for that downward mobility. So as CEO of Orange Computers, I invite the water-bearer to come and pour buckets on the hot-headed. And it is my mission statement To achieve the love without tension Like slacking cloth. Running on the beach, I was relieved to see two teenagers drawing a penis. *** "People" Secrets of the stars are found online. The stars are people too, On People.com Images of the haircuts of the stars are made of light, Shining through some glass of the browser window, But the window is not the source of light. Light traveling is the space traveling prophecy. It is a mystery why followers gaze, And those who do so, leave their bodies. *** It's very dangerous to leave your body, and I've had many of out-of-body experiences. I've had enough out of body experiences. And so, at work you have an inner-body experience. That's why I like the web, very much, because it's inside. So. I want to talk about a way to strengthen a connection to the web inside. You need an antenna. And the Internet uses an antenna. That's the crystal shape. And in the body, we also have an antenna that's a crystal shape, and that's the bones. The bones are like a crystal, kinda -- they grow, in the same way, repeated patterns inside them, and they can be the antenna. The main antenna is the spine, which has 24 vertebrae. And that's a very doctor-y word, "the vertebrae". Bunny's last poem talked about the vertebrae. So I'm very happy to make this my last poem, and talk about the vertebrae. But I'm going to call the vertebrae, "links", and these turn on the spine, all the links. And then you improve upon your antenna. So, I'm just going to count the vertebrae in my spine, and I do this to improve the antenna. Maybe you can feel your own vertebrae, maybe not, but you can learn to feel your own vertebrae. You follow the links. We're getting up and going down. I'm going to start with the skull, and wrap the skull in words, and at the base of the skull, find the first link. Five cervical vertebrae. One. Seven cervical vertebrae. Five lumbar vertebrae -- so hard to say the doctor words. Three segments. Seven, twelve, five. Seven cervical. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. Twelve thoracic vertebrae. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve. Five lumbar. One, two, three, four, five. Sacrum: tail. All the links happy and relaxed, feeling completely connected. *** Thank you.

Kevin Bewersdorf, ritual.technology, 2014. Website

“A man salvages a set of drums at Rockaway Beach in Queens, New York, on Saturday. Most of the Rockaway Peninsula remains without power.” October 30, 2012, via CNN.com

Candle on blue carpet used for Kev's purekev.com meditations. Via Rhizome

Kev doing his Chi Kung practice in Rockaway. Via Rhizome

Kev in one of his favorite meditation places, an old rock quarry upstate. Via Rhizome

Kevin Bewersdorf, “Alien Baby”. From the album kev, 2012. Shared by Paul Slocum

Kevin Bewersdorf, “No Memory”. From the album kev, 2012. Shared by Paul Slocum

Kevin Bewersdorf, “Bushobama”. From the album kev, 2012. Shared by Paul Slocum