so on........
As time gone by, life has been tough. dealing with college life stress, family, financial and drug addict dad issues. Everything has gone worse with my condition. I kept having multiple episodes, manic ones. I tend to not remember clearly all the manic episodes whenever I am back on the normal state, its seems to be just those epic ones.
Like back on college on our Acquaintance night, I roughly remember it now that it was like 11 years ago. What I remember is that it was freaky. It was clear that I was not on my normal state at that moment. It started on the campus, I was all dressed up like everyone else, from what I remember I was so hyper that night. I was able to go through both buildings of the university like in a rush for something. I was like drunk even I did not drink any hard liquor. Hyper as I was so far from what i remember I joined a stranger group where I was like invited to hangout or so was I thinking that night. Then was all a blur of laughter and creeps. After that I remember riding a jeepney I was about to go home then but what happened was I just passed by it. Then it was raining I was able to stopped by our old address without any knowledge why, and so the endless walking started while the rain was worse. I was soaking wet and restless. The long distance from where i stopped ‘til our house did not matter I just walked and walked feeling drowsy, tired and lost. The rain stopped then when I was getting nearer my destination. I was cold wet then slowly drying up through the humid weather afterwards. Then I realized it was very late. I finally arrived on our street, then a tricycle driver approached me saying that my parents were looking everywhere for me. Then acting like completely crazy while I was already inside the tricycle I grabbed the controls while he was driving then we bumped into something I can’t remember like maybe a post or something. Then I blacked out next thing I remember I’m home then. I was then abused by my dad, he kicked me to the hallway and asked me to take all my clothes off since I was soaking wet and dirty, so I did. all naked and everything all curled up like a baby in the womb of my mother again, my father was scolding me, shouting while my relatives were staring in awe and insult. It was my most embarrassing moment I consider. Then I went to the bathroom to clean myself, it was all a blur right after. All I remember was that I cried a lot that night. There I just shared the worst time in my life. There was more to it right after or before but I wish not to remember it all specially since I am in a better state at the moment.
