I’ve been thinking a lot about this lately, and I want to know if anyone else is in the same boat. I see so many posts about health issues, pre-diabetes, high blood pressure, heart problems, linked to gaining weight, but how many of us are just not checking on any of that? How many of us are just gaining and living, ignoring the signs and the risks?
I’m 20, and gaining has become a lifestyle for me. I’m talking fast food, takeout, soda after soda, it’s what fuels me. It’s not just about eating, it’s about feeling my body change. The heaviness in my stomach after a huge meal, the way my clothes fit tighter every week, the softness of my skin stretching as I grow. And let’s not forget the chest pains that come after stuffing myself with greasy food. Sometimes it’s a sharp throb, like my heart is protesting the extra weight, but I push it down. Or the way I’m out of breath just walking up the stairs, my chest tightening, my legs feeling heavier with each step. It’s getting harder to breathe after even the smallest exertion, but I tell myself it’s just part of the ride.
I’ve had blood tests, and yeah, the numbers don’t lie. My cholesterol’s up, my blood sugar’s creeping higher, but my doctor brushes it off. One time, I got weird results, and they assumed I wasn’t fasting before the test when I actually was. It’s like my health just doesn’t matter to anyone, so why should it matter to me? It feels easier to ignore it all, to focus on the feeling of getting fatter, the high that comes from getting softer and rounder with each passing day.
But here’s the truth, the physical signs are there. I know I’m not healthy. I’m literally out of breath after a few minutes of walking, my heart aches sometimes after eating, and I feel like I’m sinking into my own body. But even with all that, I don’t want to stop. The idea of giving up this lifestyle, of losing the thrill of seeing myself get bigger, doesn’t seem worth it. I love the way my body feels, heavy, soft, and a little out of control.
So, I guess I’m asking, how many of us are just ignoring these physical signs and continuing down this path? I get that it’s not healthy, but the ride feels so damn good. I can’t be the only one here who feels like the gain is worth it, even if the consequences are starting to show. Anyone else dealing with the reality of the body changing, knowing the risks are there, but not sure if they care enough to stop?