Writings

***

As he stepped into the house, De Jun was overwhelmed. Lights flashed, music boomed, and the smell of alcohol tainted the air. You know, the usual. Unusual though, was some kid hanging upside down off the stairs, and a dude dressed as Santa (it was April).

Sicheng disappeared quickly into the crowd, leaving De Jun alone in the doorway.

“Damn it,” he muttered.

Glancing around the room, he figured out the quickest route to the kitchen. One that included the least amount of people.

The kitchen was empty as he entered it, most people socializing in the living room. De Jun poured himself a glass of water, not being much of a drinker himself. He usually avoided parties.

“Since when does Kun have so many friends?” he sighed, leaning against the counter. He didn’t understand how people could be so social. In the last four years, De Jun had had a couple close friends (Sicheng and Yukhei), and some acquaintances (Kun and Guanheng). Even then, he only saw Yukhei every couple weeks, and Sicheng more often, but just because they lived together. His mother had told him that growing distant was just a part of growing up. It was starting to seem like she was right.

De Jun wondered if he should join the crowd, if anyone (besides Sicheng) even knew he was here. He supposed he should at least congratulate Kun before he left.

So he walked out of the kitchen, immediately running into someone. He was thankful that it was Yukhei. They exchanged quick greetings, and Yukhei lead De Jun to the room that Kun was in.

“Is he here yet?” De Jun asked Yukhei, as quietly as he could while still being heard over the music.

Yukhei shook his head. “They’re coming in about an hour if you wanna socialise and get out before then.”

“Thanks,” De Jun smiled. Yukhei and Sicheng were opposites regarding De Jun’s feelings. Yukhei respected his emotions, while Sicheng often told him to get over it. De Jun appreciated both.

It wasn’t like De Jun hadn’t seen Yang Yang in a long time - they’d hung out as a group just last week. He was just never prepared.

Some nights were better than others, and De Jun was able to handle it. Sometimes it was like he’d never liked Yang Yang in the first place. And then he’d be alone, and his mind would wander.

He thought he was stupid for having this crush for so long, especially when he’d been treated so poorly. But he’d never gone more than two weeks without seeing Yang Yang, so he’d not really had the chance to get over it.

De Jun shook his head clear, and made his way over to Kun, giving him a hug, and a congratulations. He sat nearby for a while, listening in on the conversations. He learnt quickly that: Kun was moving away to go to grad school, Guanheng had a girlfriend, and that Yukhei was getting a dog. Apparently he’d missed a lot.

Missing things was all he seemed to do now.

***

Yang Yang and Ten arrived separately.

Ten arrived quarter past nine, already drunk. He greeted everyone but De Jun. They hadn’t been on good terms for a long time. De Jun wasn’t phased by it. Ten was barely civil sober.

Yang Yang didn’t show up until almost eleven. And seemingly without a drop of alcohol in his system. He was quieter than normal, but De Jun was certain he had some sort of reason. Maybe he didn’t want to outshine Kun tonight.

De Jun watched Yang Yang’s mood brighten as he started interacting with others. Somehow Yang Yang got along with everyone, stranger and friend alike. De Jun wished he could be like that.

Letting Yang Yang take over the bulk of the conversation, De Jun sunk back into his chair, wondering if he should get himself ready to go. As the night progressed, Yang Yang and Ten would likely fill the room with PDA, and De Jun definitely wasn’t in the mood to see that.

He let himself fall farther into his chair as Yang Yang sat on the arm of it. De Jun was almost certain Yang Yang hadn’t even processed that he was sitting there (the boy was so wrapped up in his story), but he didn’t want to engage in a conversation. Not tonight.

Yang Yang sitting on the arm of the chair quickly turned into Yang Yang squishing himself beside De Jun in the seat. De Jun hadn’t even been acknowledged yet, but he was practically being sat on.

“Dude...seriously?” he finally spoke up, earning Yang Yang’s attention.

“What?” Yang Yang started. “Oh shit, uh, sorry,” he said, clearly noticing their proximity. “I can move, there just aren’t exactly a lot of seats. I didn’t mean to like, fall onto you.”

“It’s okay. I was gonna go get some air anyway.” De Jun removed himself from the situation, finding his way onto Kun’s back porch.

He slumped against the railing, taking a deep breath. The air was refreshing, and didn’t taste of stale liquor. He was thankful for that. The music was slightly muffled behind the closed door, and for a moment, he felt like he could think clearly.

Was Yang Yang actually unaware of who was sitting in that seat? Or was he trying to push it? Maybe he thought that they were closer than De Jun felt them to be.

De Jun tesnsed when he heard the door open, but kept himself facing the trees in the backyard. It was probably just someone coming out for a smoke.

“Jun..?”

De Jun spun around. Yang Yang was standing barely two steps away from him.

“I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable,” Yang Yang continued. “I thought we were, well, closer now, and that me trying to act a little more casual around you would be okay.”

Nodding, De Jun tried to find his words. “No, it’s fine, I just..” he paused. “You took me by surprise is all. Didn’t think that was something that Ten would be okay with.”

Yang Yang’s face morphed into one of confusion. “Why would Ten care?”

“Well aren’t you guys-’

“We broke up like a month ago.”

“Oh.” De Jun froze. Yang Yang and Ten had still been pretty close when they hung out last week. “What happened?”

“He’s moving across the country. I’m not good with distance,” Yang Yang shrugged. “I wanted to tell you first, but I felt like you wouldn’t want to hear it," he hesitated over his next choice of words. "Why don’t we talk anymore?”

De Jun grimaced. “Because Ten told you I was changing you.”

“I guess I was pretty blindsided.”

Yang Yang laughed awkwardly, running his hands through his hair. De Jun couldn’t take his eyes off him.

They stood in silence for longer than De Jun would’ve liked.

“I’m gonna go back inside,” De Jun started.

Yang Yang quickly grabbed his wrist. “Stay. I-” he fumbled. “Can we start over?”

De Jun responded with a curt nod. He hadn’t spoken to Yang Yang or Ten in almost two weeks, and here he was, crashing a movie night he’d never before been invited to. He was thankful for Yukhei. Yukhei had continued talking to him, even though the other two had cut him out. Yukhei had given him a reason to break from his normal schedule, even if it was just to hang out and play Mario Kart.

Somehow, Yukhei had convinced De Jun to join for this movie night - at Yang Yang’s house of all places. Yukhei had assured De Jun that the other two were aware that he was joining, but De Jun didn’t believe it. There’s no way that they would have agreed.

De Jun and Yukhei paused at the doorway, waiting for someone to let them in. De Jun kept his eyes focused on the concrete steps below him, trying to ignore his trembling hands and unsteady breathing.

His first mistake was looking up when the door swung open.

His eyes met Yang Yang’s immediately.

De Jun wanted to melt, to wither away. He couldn’t help but think that Yang Yang looked stunning - as always. He wore a simple outfit - black sweats and a white t-shirt - but De Jun found him captivating nonetheless. Yang Yang’s messy hair brought back memories of waking up beside him, and De Jun found himself quickly looking away - he wasn’t here to be sad.

Yang Yang spit out a hasty greeting, and stepped aside to let them in. De Jun followed behind him and removed his shoes. Yukhei and Yang Yang has already headed to the living room, so De Jun hurried to catch up. He filled in the empty space on the loveseat - next to Yukhei. He didn’t want to push his limits with the other two so early on in the night.

“So what are we in the mood to watch today?” Ten asked, breaking the silence that had fallen over the room.

De Jun offered a small shrug. “This is normally a you guys thing - I’m good with whatever you choose.”

“You’re here now, I don’t want to put on something you hate,” Yang Yang added. De Jun thought his tone was almost patronizing - it seemed as if Yang Yang was really trying to pretend that nothing had happened.

“You really can put on whatever. I’m not picky.”

“So something super gory?” Yang Yang teased. He knew that De Jun didn’t like when movies were filled with blood and guts. De Jun had a weak stomach.

De Jun responded with another half-hearted shrug. “Like I said, whatever you want.” He wasn’t expecting to really be watching the movie anyway. He already had his phone in hand - he didn’t really do anything without it anymore. It was like an extra appendage at this point.

Yukhei was quick to smack the device out of his grasp. “At least try to socialize.”

Collectively, the group decided on a comedy, or rather, a series of comedies.

Yukhei and Ten went into the kitchen to make snacks, leaving the exes alone. “I’m going to have to leave after this first movie. The last bus leaves just after 10:30.” De Jun stated.

Yang Yang shook his head. “You can just crash here.”

“I really don’t want to push.”

“The other two are staying as well.”

“I didn’t bring pjs or anything.” De Jun was trying his absolute hardest to get out of this.

“You can borrow some of mine.”

De Jun gulped, but nodded. It would be rude to keep making excuses. “Alright.”

Yang Yang smiled at him. They sat in a silence somewhere between awkward and comfortable until the others returned to the room. Yukhei and Ten eached carried a bowl of popcorn, and returned to their previous seats.

De Jun couldn’t help but watch Yang Yang and Ten’s interactions. The way Ten would feed Yang Yang popcorn; how Yang Yang laughed at all of Ten’s jokes; how they cuddled under a blanket as the movie started.

His second mistake was that he’d agreed to stay the night.

De Jun missed most of the storyline of the first film - he was too focused on other things. Now the rest of his night would be even more unbearable - he couldn’t even attempt to get lost in the movies.

The groups took a bathroom break after the first comedy finished. Yang Yang disappeared into his room, returning in a pair of pjs, with another set in hand for De Jun.

De Jun thanked him and changed in the bathroom. They were about the same so he wasn’t worried about fitting into them. He was just worried that Ten would say something.

De Jun returned to the living room in the striped pjs, sitting again beside Yukhei. Ten started the next film as they all settled in. De Jun spent some time trying to understand the plot, but gave up pretty quickly. He instead let his gaze wander around the room.

His eyes met Yang Yang’s during his visual trip. De Jun looked away immediately, unsure of if Yang Yang had already been looking at him, or if it was just coincidence.

He was leaning towards the latter until he received a text.

You look cute.

De Jun glanced over at Yang Yang, only to see the boy smiling down at his phone. De Jun turned back to the TV, deleting the text and locking his phone.

I mean it.

De Jun frowned, trying to ignore it as best as he could.

I know we ended on a bad note. I’m sorry. But you really do look lovely tonight.

Don’t do this, De Jun replied.

Do what?

I’m not playing this game Yang Yang. Just watch the movie.

As if you are.

I’m trying, De Jun placed his phone down, forcing himself to watch the movie. He waited for a particularly funny part - at least to the others - to slip to the bathroom.

He removed Yang Yang’s pjs and replaced them with his own clothes. Exiting the bathroom, he decided to leave the pjs folded neatly on the kitchen counter. Walking to the entryway, he laced up his shoes and quietly left the house.

The last bus had already come and gone, so he would have to walk home - seemingly a trend after leaving Yang Yang’s company.

He waited until he arrived home to tell Yukhei he was alive. He waited even longer to text Yang Yang.

I left your pajamas on the counter.

There are three different types of hemophilia. All three are inherited genetically. 30% of hemophiliacs that inherit the disorder have no family genetic history of it. Theirs is caused by a genetic change, also known as a spontaneous mutation. Hemophilia A is caused by the lack of clotting factor VIII. It is the most common type. Hemophilia B is caused by insufficient clotting factor IX. Both Hemophilia A and B are more common in males. It is normally passed from mother to son, through the mother’s X chromosome. Most women with hemophilia are just carriers of the disease. Hemophilia C is caused by a shortage of clotting factor XI. Both men and women can carry this disease and it can be passed on by either parent. (mayoclinic.com)

While there may be no cure for the disorder, treatments are available. Often doctors recommend injections of the hormone desmopressin, or DDAVP, to help stimulate the release of more clotting factors. If left untreated, the internal bleeding may cause damage to joints and organs. The doctor may recommend physical therapy to help ease the pain in joints. (mayoclinic.com)

Hemophilia is sometimes labelled as the “royal disease” because of its presence in European royalty. The disorder was passed from Queen Victoria to other ruling families, in places like Russia, Germany and Spain. (hog.org) While inbreeding was not the cause of the mutation which caused Queen Victoria to have hemophilia, it was what spread the disease so quickly through Europe. Seven of her descendants died because of complications caused by hemophilia. (owlcation.com)

People such as Ryan Wayne White, who became America’s poster boy for HIV/AIDS, and Abraham Lincoln, the 16th president of the United States had hemophilia. (historyrocket.com) Pop culture often refers to hemophilia. More often, hemophilia can be found as the cause of vampirism. Video games, such as Oblivion and Skyrim, reference to hemophilia as the cause of the disease. It explains that the characters high loss of blood is what drives them to search for more. (en.uesp.net).

To summarize, hemophilia has become a well known disease, due to pop culture increasingly mentioning it. Although incurable, a hemophiliac could still live a normal life. If left untreated, it could be fatal.

Dracula. Todd Browning. Universal Pictures Corporation, 1931. Film. Georgianna Lowery. The Habsburg Jaw and Other Royal Inbreeding Deformities. September 2, 2015.www.owlcation.com/humanities/The-Habsburg-Jaw-And-Other-Royal-Inbreeding- Deformities-and-Disorders. May 26, 2017

Hemophilia of Georgia. The History of Hemophilia. www.hog.org/handbook/article/1/3/the-history-of-hemophilia. May 26, 2017.

History Rocket. Famous People With Hemophilia. 2012. http://www.historyrocket.com/Famous-people/Famous-People-With-Hemophilia.html. May 26, 2017

Sungha now tours, and has done many concerts in Europe, America and South Korea (Lakewood Guitars).  He’s worked with artists such as 2NE1, G-Dragon and Jason Mraz. (Wikipedia).  His fame has grown to the point to where he even needs a bodyguard so he can walk around without being mobbed by crazy fans (Lakewood Guitars).

Sungha has been an influence to many young guitarists, including myself. He has been the reason many have started playing, and the reason why many returned to a long lost passion. He is still posting weekly, and plans to tours Hong Kong and Taiwan in the upcoming months (YouTube).

Sungha’s “On Cloud Nine” is an original piece, written for his album L’Atelier. It is a slow, but upbeat song that uses methods such as tambora, and golpe. Sungha’s smile and ability to move with the music truly captures the audience, and it is easy to see just how much he loves what he does. His ability to move so freely while playing a seemingly difficult piece shows his talent.

“About Sungha Jung.” Sungha Jung, 2009. http://www.sunghajung.com/about

Jung, Sungha. “(Sungha Jung) On Cloud Nine – Sungha Jung.” YouTube,   uploaded by Sungha Jung, 15 May 2016. https://www.youtube.com/watch?   v=1PEKnE8Z8Mg

Jung, Sungha. “Sungha Jung.”   YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjWRi2qaGtKjQyoQLc4OGkw

“Lakewood Musician Sungha Jung.” Lakewood Guitars,   2018. https://www.lakewood-guitars.com/musicians_details.php?m_id=3

Sor staged his first opera in 1797, called Il Telemaco nell’isola de Calipso. After this work, he moved to Madrid, where the duchess Alba supported him until her passing in 1802 (Blumberg 2018).

When Napoleon invaded Spain in 1808, Sor started to write nationalistic music for guitar, which often included patriotic lyrics. Some of these works included Vivir en cadenas and Vendid (Jeffrey 2001). After the Spanish repelled the French, Sor left for Paris, with no plans to return home ever again (Wikipedia 2018).

After minimal success in Paris, Sor moved to London. He published 11 sets of three Italian ariettas for both voice and piano. During this time, he also published vocal duets, two English songs, pieces for the piano - both duet and solo - and solo guitar. Sor also had four ballets produced in London between 1821—1823, Cendrillon being the most successful (Jeffrey 2001).

He returned to Paris in 1826 and published six guitar compositions immediately, before later publishing his Methode pour la guitarre in 1830. Sor continued to play and teach the guitar until his passing in 1839 (Jeffrey 2001).

Sor is now famed mostly as a concert performer on guitar, and is renowned for his 65 compositions for the instrument. His pieces are an important part of the classical guitar repertoire. Sor’s  Methode pour la guitarre has been called “one of the most remarkable books on guitar technique ever written” (Jeffrey 2001).

Sor’s piece “Op.35 No.22” (played by Andres Segovia) , is a slow yet intriguing piece. It creates a sad tone, with it being in the key of B Minor, yet evokes happier images, almost as if it is reminiscing on past memories. The chords itself are played in arpeggio, and the song takes the structure of A, B, A1. The song starts soft, and crescendos up into the B section, and then decrescendos back down for the end of the piece.

Blumberg, Naomi. “Fernando Sor”. Britannica.   https://www.britannica.com/biography/Fernando-Sor. Accessed October 9,   2018.

“Fernando Sor”. Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fernando_Sor.     Accessed October 9, 2018.

Jeffrey, Brian. The New Grove Dictionary of Music and Musicians. 2nd Edition.   29 vols. New York: Grove, 2001

Maya culture has changed drastically over the last few hundred years. Many Maya traditions have become intermingled with European ones. After the Spanish conquest in the mid 1500s, the Maya people were forced to adapt; they integrated their cultures as a matter of survival. They had to learn to fit in with the Europeans, so as not to disrupt the new ruling. The transformations in architecture, religion, language and politics have changed the way the Maya live.

Maya architecture is much different than it used to be. In the past, Maya buildings such as houses, pyramids, and palaces were built out of limestone. Most Maya lived in city states - a city with its surrounding area would make up the state. The Maya built temples and palaces in the city centers, and houses surrounded them. The buildings weren’t laid out like a Western city would be, instead they were placed strategically to avoid flooding, building structures on uneven areas of higher ground. If not given the proper space to build, the Maya houses would be washed away during a storm. Residential areas started close to the center of the city, and grew sparser as they spread away. Most Maya lived in small houses - often times these houses were clumped together, leading researchers to believe that extended families would build close together. Family houses and palaces had thatch roofs which were made of straw, reed and palm leaves so they were easy to replace when the weather wore them down. Hurricanes and tropical storms were common in Mesoamerica, causing the Maya to change how they built. Unfortunately, when cities were abandoned, many of the buildings fell into shambles. Most of the surviving structures are temples, which were built to last through weather and war. Several foundations from smaller houses remain around the cities as they were meant to have continuous upkeep, though they are meek in comparison to the temples.(Minster 2019).

Maya houses now have a different structure. Rural houses have been reduced to foundations, and updated to fit a more European style. Many of the towns that dot the Yucatan Peninsula were once Maya. The houses in these towns are colourful by Spanish design, but are laid on top of Maya foundations, truly emphasizing that the Europeans had taken over. The Maya temples, such as Chichen Itza, Palenque and Uxmal, remained untouched as the Europeans found them too difficult to tear down, and hard to repurpose. Many of the temples are now protected, and tourists can no longer walk through them in hopes to preserve what remains (Antonio 2019).

The Maya religious beliefs were formed on the idea that everything in the world contained k’uh (sacredness). They worshipped over 165 Gods, who were represented by nature, for example: Chaac - the God of rain, Kinih Ahous - the God of sun, and Yum Kaax - the God of maize. Maya Gods were human like; they were born and they died, they farmed and they fought wars - if the Gods could do it, then it was acceptable for the Maya to as well.  All deceased Maya would be sent to the Underworld (rulers included), unless they died in childbirth, or were sacrificed (which was seen as an honour). Sacrificing rituals were held at the top of a pyramid so that the public could view them. The Underworld was filled with evil Gods, who were represented by jaguars (Hullche1 2013).

Many Maya still practice the Maya religion, but it has become merged with Catholicism. Not all are polytheist - some believe solely in one God. Their one God is sometimes one of the 165 that the Maya used to worship, and sometimes it is a God from another religion (most often Catholicism or Christianity). Maya still take pride in their focus on astronomy in their religion, and still focus heavily on the symbolism of animals - the figures of jaguars, which represent the night, and rattlesnakes, which represent fertility, can still be found within their homes and on the clothes that they wear (Antonio 2019).

The Maya relied heavily on their calendars in the past - to discover when to perform rituals. On the Yucatan Peninsula, the Maya still use the calendar Haab, which is a 19 month calendar - 18 being 20 days and the last being five. They use the last five days - a month called Wayeb - to perform ceremonies. They are usually hoping for better crops, and are praying to their rain God, Chaac. However, for most daily activities they now rely on the Gregorian (Antonio 2019).

The Maya spoke over 32 different dialects of Mayan during their reign. They had an elaborate writing system, mostly written with hieroglyphs. Much of its history was destroyed by the Europeans who took over the Mesoamerican area in the mid 16th century. There were three main branches of Mayan dialect, each of which split off into even more distinct ones. Each country typically had their own dialect, and these dialects differed between regions of the country. For example, the Yucatecan branch of dialect (found mostly in the Yucatan Peninsula) harboured the Yucatec Maya, Lacandon, Itzáj, and Mopan dialects (Campbell 2018). While their written language has not been intensely studied, their numerical system has, due to it being easier to decipher. For example: • means one, and 丨means five, therefore •丨would mean six. The symbols vary as the numbers get larger, but the smaller numbers are the most studied thus far (Antonio 2019).

Today, there are still around 30 different dialects of Mayan spoken, but almost all of them are endangered, with only about five million people still speaking Mayan. The dialects have a wide number of people using them - from about 1 million people speaking one, to less than 30 speaking another. Only two languages have disappeared since the Spanish conquest, but since then the number of people learning Mayan has dwindled. It is not being taught to the Maya children as often as many children opt to learn Spanish instead. Many schools in Central America do not teach Mayan, and with the Maya people not being taught the language in their family homes, they will likely not learn it at all (England 2018). The written language is now romanized - writing in hieroglyphics is uncommon. Their number system has also changed - most Maya now use the Arabic numeral system. The Mayan language is yet another aspect of Maya culture that is being thrown aside in exchange for a more European one(Antonio 2019).

In ancient Maya times, there never was one single ruler for the entire empire - each state had its own ruler. The Maya states were linked together through trade, political alliances and tribute obligations. Each ruler was succeeded by his son, brother, or a suitable candidate if they had no living relatives. Military commanders - called nacom - were assigned to every state. The nacom were tasked to create military strategies and to call troops to war if necessary. A high priest was also necessary in each state - they led a hierarchy of priests, and organized festivals and rituals. As with many other ancient civilizations, the Maya were split into classes: nobles, commoners, serfs and slaves. Noble status and occupation were passed on through lineages - only the nobles could hold government jobs. Nobles were literate and wealthy, and would generally live close to the city’s center, while labourers, farmers and servants who live outside of the city’s central in familial groups, were considered commoners. It is believed that commoners could become quite wealthy if they were merchants, and some were even able to move up in class through service in the military - they were not, however, allowed to don clothes and symbols of nobility. Many Maya laws are unknown as Spanish priests destroyed codices when they invaded Mesoamerica. What is known is that crime punishment was harsh. Many crimes were punishable by death, though the Maya distinguished between accidental and purposeful crimes. If a crime was deemed accidental, the perpetrator would not be killed, instead they would have to pay the victim’s family or give them a slave. If a crime was committed by a minor, they would be sent into slavery, working for the victim (Tarlton 2018).

In Guatemala, the Maya make up 51% of the population, yet they still have to fight for their rights. Being indigenous, they often are still excluded from political events. There is an indigenous political party, Winaq, but they only win about 3.5 percent of the vote. That being said, even if the Winaq were elected in, they are forbidden from working a decision-making leadership role. In 1996, there was an agreement passed to promote indigenous cultural and social rights. However, with limited resources, and the lack of political will to enforce this, the Maya people are still struggling. They are faced with a lack of judicial rights as well - Maya people will be tried in Spanish, even when they do not speak the language, and often, no translator will be provided. As well, many Maya people find the profit that the government makes off their ancestors ruins to be an affront to their spiritual rights. They are granted no free access to these areas, and the areas themselves are not guaranteed future protection (Maya 2019).

Maya culture has changed drastically over the course of time. From kingdoms to democracies, Mayan to Spanish, polytheist to monotheist; they have adapted and grown. Although the Maya have adapted and grown as a culture, this adaptation has only happened because of the way the Europeans have treated them in both the past and the present. While their languages are endangered, the people still thrive and hope to put rights together to protect what remains of their culture.

Antonio. “Introduction to the Maya” Public Speech, Museum of Anthropology and History,Merida, 9 Feb 2019.

Campbell, Lyle. 2018. “Mayan Languages.” Encyclopædia Britannica. Encyclopædia Britannica,inc. April 25. https://www.britannica.com/topic/Mayan-languages.

England, Nora C. 2018. “Mayan Languages - Oxford Research Encyclopedia of Linguistics.”Oxford Research Encyclopedias. March 21. http://oxfordre.com/linguistics/view/10.1093/acrefore/9780199384655.001.0001/acrefor-9780199384655-e-60.

Hullche1. “Mayans Religion: Gods, Animal Spirits and Pyramids.” 2013. Great Discoveries in Archaeology. April 24. http://anthropology.msu.edu/anp264-ss13/2013/04/24/mayans-religion-gods-animal-spirits-and-pyramids/.

“Maya.” 2019. Minority Rights Group. Accessed April 6 https://minorityrights.org/minorities/maya-2/.

Minster, Christopher. 2019. “What Was Ancient Mayan Architecture Like?” ThoughtCo. ThoughtCo. January 21. https://www.thoughtco.com/ancient-maya-architecture-2136167.

The Korean Wave, better known to some as the Hallyu, is the term used to describe the rising popularity of South Korean culture globally. The term “Hallyu” was first used in China, in 1998, to describe the sudden craze for Korean cultural products from Chinese youth (Kim 2014).   Now this is seen through things such as k-dramas (television shows), k-movies, and k-pop. K-pop is the industry which has taken off the most. It has been influenced by the American industry, shown both within their music and their styles. Because of the growing popularity of k-pop, it has become a more welcome occupation in Korea. The amount of fans has increased worldwide, giving k-pop the ability to enter the American industry, and for international members to join groups.

The American industry has had a huge effect on k-pop. During the Korean War, Americans and Koreans had a fairly close relationship. The American troop stationed in Korea -  USAMGIK - brought a radio channel called AFKN. The channel’s original intent was to inform American’s of Korean culture, yet instead seemed to do the opposite. Koreans became increasingly interested in the style of American music, and starting including it within concerts. Korean artists had to learn American songs and dances to perform for the soldiers. As the USAMGIK started leaving for the Vietnam War, the artists who once performed at these camps had to integrate these American elements with a Korean style to gain a more domestic audience. In the 1980’s and 1990’s, genres like hip-hop, pop and ballad became prevalent in the Korean industry - to the point that artists like Seo Taiji starting including rap and rock styles into their own hits (Stephen 2018).

This type of influence can still be seen heavily today. After the popularity of the Latin-American song “Despacito” by Luis Fonsi, the style seemed to reappear again a few months later in Korea. Songs like “Lo Siento” by Super Junior featuring Leslie Grace, “Senorita” by VAV, and “O Sole Mio” by SF9 became popular hits, all featuring Spanish lyrics, and a strong Latin guitar line (Herman 2018). As we see Charlie Puth rise in the American industry, we see males in the k-pop industry wanting to mimic his falsetto sound. Singers like Jungkook and Jimin of BTS have covered his songs, and groups such as NCT are showing males doing falsetto much more often (e.g. The 7th Sense or Simon Says). Jungkook even got a chance to perform a duet with Charlie Puth at the 2018 MGA, before BTS performed their hit “Fake Love”, with Puth singing the chorus (TWOWAIISHU 2018).

With this increase in popularity, the acceptability of being a performer has also improved. Statistics taken from elementary school students in 1981 showed that students didn’t even toy with the idea of being performs. When the survey was retaken in 1999, the amount of students that wanted to be entertainers was up to 9%. This study was done again in 2012, and the statistic had again grown - up to 38.8%. The main cause of this growth is “what some researchers call “cosmopolitan striving” or“han/melancholia””. Koreans tend to see Western success to have more social legitimacy. With the rise in popularity of k-pop, some of their own success has become legitimised, therefore making being an idol, or entertainer, more acceptable (Oh and Lee 2013, 115).

As the entertainment industry grows, so does the fanbase. The k-pop industry is giving fans many bands and groups to choose from, and very rarely is a fan part of just one fandom. Groups that don’t gain as much recognition in Korea are greatly recognized in Brazil, Japan and Europe. Countries like Austria don’t have as large of a fanbase, but the fans are still just as supportive. As stated in Song’s essay, “ German and Austrian people are very conservative, and they have a very strong pride in their own things.” This explains why in some countries, the fanbase grows slower. Many countries, including the United States take pride in their own industries, and aren’t always willing to open up to new things — especially in the older generations. Since “Gangnam Style” by PSY has gotten popular, the amount of k-pop fans in Austria has increased. And has been growing slowly, but steadily in the past years (Song 2013, 93-94).

K-pop’s popularity has recently increased significantly in the United States. Groups such as NCT and BTS have attended the AMAs in the last two years (Jin 2017, 1). Both groups, plus others like K.A.R.D, and Monsta X, have also released songs that are mostly in English within the past year to try and attract more attention from their American fans. While these hits have gotten quite popular, they aren’t the first to do so. Groups like Girls’ Generations, also known as SNSD, had their hit “The Boys” released in both English and Korean back in 2011, and were even on Good Morning America — which was easily accessible to them as several members are from America.  The Korean wave has been growing stronger and stronger over the years. CL, an idol formally from the group 2NE1, released multiple English songs with her group, such as “Can’t Nobody”. More recently, she has released her own song “Lifted” which is fully in English, and has worked with the group Black Eyed Peas to release the song “Dopeness” (SBS 2018).

Many Korean artists now tour North America, hitting big cities in both the United States and Canada. BTS had a world tour this year, going to America, Canada, and Europe. The tour was received so well that they are already planning another, perhaps even larger tour in 2019 (Vivid Seats 2018).  Groups such as Monsta X and GOT7 have become regular guests for big events, such as KCON, which has been held in both LA and New York over the last few years (KCONUSA 2018).  NCT, GOT7 and Day6 have plans to further their promotions in America, as they have members coming from the country.

While these groups may be sharing their music internationally, some of them are actually quite diverse within their groups. NCT, an eighteen — and soon to be twenty-one — member group under SM Entertainment, has male idols from all around the world. NCT stands for Neo Culture Technology, and the group’s concept is to have an unlimited amount of members. The group includes nine Korean born members (Taeyong, Taeil, Jisung, Jeno, Jaemin, Haechan, Jaehyun, Doyoung, Jungwoo), one American (Johnny), one Canadian (Mark), one Japanese (Yuta), seven Chinese (WinWin, Xiao Jun, Hendery, Renjun, Chenle, Kun, Lucas), one German (YangYang), and one Thai (Ten). NCT is split into many sub-units, to save them from the struggle of performing with so many people on stage. As of right now, they have 4 units, and a fifth one, NCT Vision — the Chinese members — will be debuting by the end of 2018. SM’s CEO, Lee Soo Man, has stated that he has plans to create a new unit, currently called NCT Vietnam. There have also been recent rumours of debuting a female unit within NCT (kprofiles 2018).

Many other idol groups are diverse as well, though most times with a smaller amount of people. RaNia, a female idol group under DR Music had Chinese (Ttabo,Yijo) , Thai (Namfon, Joy), and African American (Alex) members, and GOT7, a male idol group, under JYP Entertainment has Chinese (Jackson), Thai (BamBam), and American (Mark)  members. Not only is the diversity being seen in idol groups, but also within Korean bands. Day6 includes American (Jae) and Canadian (Young K) members, and W24’s lead singer is from Chile (Howon). This diversity is only able to happen because of how widespread k-pop has become. Many young fans dream of becoming idols, and sometimes an audition pulls through. (kprofiles 2018).

The diversity may seem great, but it must be done with care. EXP Edition, an all male, non-Korean group under IMMABB (I’m Making a Boy Band) has been met with malicious and hateful comments globally. The fact that they are mostly of caucasian descent isn’t the problem; many fans love the diversity. The problem is that this group has not gone through the years upon years of training that most idols have had to go through. For example, Johnny from NCT was in training for nine years before he could finally debut in 2016; he had been training since he was ten years old. Most of the anger about EXP Edition was that they spent no time training whatsoever. They wouldn’t have necessarily had to have started as young as idols like Johnny, but the training is necessary to compete in such an industry. A three member female group from Japan, Honey Popcorn, made their debut as k-pop idols in March of 2018. While none of the members in this group are Korean, they were received better, as they had gone through similar training to what k-pop idols would in Japan. It is understandable that with the spread of k-pop, there will be more people who want to become idols. To be successful in the industry however, you must go through the same training and struggles that other artists do (Blessedkpop 2018).

The Korean music industry has grown in America, reeling in many international artists. Due to this k-pop is becoming a bigger topic at households in Korea, and due to the fact that being an idol is more generally accepted as an occupation. Korean idol groups will be continuously touring North America, and likely releasing even more English tracks. The Korean Wave has certainly taken off, and it doesn’t look like it will be stopping anytime soon.

“15 Amazing English-Language K-Pop Songs.” 2018. SBS News. SBS News. May 22. https://www.sbs.com.au/popasia/blog/2018/05/22/15-amazing-english-language-k-pop-songs.

“2019 Concert Tours: Predicting the Top 2019 Tours.” 2018. Vivid Seats. Accessed December 1. https://www.vividseats.com/blog/2019-concert-tours-predictions.

Blessedkpop. 2018. “Honey Popcorn Expresses Gratitude And Discusses Divided Opinions About Their Debut.” Soompi. Soompi. March 21. https://www.soompi.com/article/1143605wpp/honey-popcorn-expresses-gratitude-discusses-divided-opinions-debut.

Herman, Tamar. 2018. “K-Pop Turns Toward Latin American Market With Collaborations And Tours.” Forbes. Forbes Magazine. June 1. https://www.forbes.com/sites/tamarherman/2018/05/31/k-pop-turns-towards-latin-amerian-market-with-collaborations-tours/#1d519513960d.

Jin, Dal Yong. An Analysis of the Korean Wave as Transnational Popular Culture: North American Youth Engage Through Social Media as TV Becomes Obsolete. Simon Fraser University. 2018.

“KCON USA OFFICIAL SITE.” 2018. KCON USA OFFICIAL SITE. Accessed December 1. http://www.kconusa.com/.

Kim, Youna. 2014. “The Korean Wave (Hallyu).” Accessed October 28, 2018.http://seaa.americananthro.org/2014/07/the-korean-wave-hallyu/

“Kpop Band Member Profiles and Korean Celebrity Profiles.” 2018. Kpop Profiles. Accessed November 28. https://kprofiles.com/.

Oh, Ingyu and Lee, Hyojung. K-pop in Korea: How the Pop Music Industry Is Changing a Post-Developmental Society. University of Hawai’i Press. 2014.

Stephen. 2018. “American Music Influence on Kpop in the Past and the Present.” Accessed December 1 https://blogs.ubc.ca/asia327girlsgen/2018/10/01/american-music-influence-on-kpop-in-the-past-and-the-present/.

Sung, Sang-Yeon. K-pop Reception and Participatory Fan Culture in Austria. University of Vienna Press. 2013.

Females are generalized, limited and misrepresented in both Galileo and Earnest. In A Life of Galileo, women are treated as lesser, or seen as overly strict. In scene three, Virginia, Galileo’s daughter, asks to look through his telescope; she shows an interest in her father’s work, only to be brushed aside by harsh words: “Why? It’s not a toy” (Brecht 23). It is implied that Galileo would be more likely to show her, had she been a boy instead. Throughout the show, Galileo takes the time to teach Andrea, who is portrayed as the son he never had. The show opens with a parental interaction between Galileo and Andrea, while Virginia is first introduced as a pretty face to present the telescope to the public. Unfortunately, the idea of women being lesser is something not limited to plays written in the 1930s, and is often shown in modern media as well - especially in commercials. Many commercials will stereotype genders; males are typically seen as the breadwinners, while women are often portrayed as homemakers. Research done in 2014, by the Journal of Marketing Management says that “family related advertising in women’s magazines does little to challenge traditional roles of paternal masculinity” (Grau and Yorgos 765). Unfortunately, Galileo treats Virginia the way he does because she is a woman - she should not take part in work related business. Comments like “See to the geese, Virginia,” when Virginia was interested in his and Andrea’s work only emphasizes the fact that Virginia is indeed seen as only a homemaker (Brecht 74). Telling Virginia to attend to the geese was a subtle way of saying “get back in the kitchen”, a joke made far too often - both verbally and on the internet (Drakett et. al. 120). Mrs. Sarti, however, pushes against that stereotype. While doing so, she manages to fall into another - she is strict. In scene one, Sarti shows that she is against Galileo teaching her son, making comments like “What are you doing to my boy…?” and “You should be ashamed…” (Brecht 7). As stated in Grau and Yorgos’s research earlier, the idea of paternal masculinity is not challenged. Brecht shows that Sarti does not want Galileo to take a parental role in Andrea’s life - anytime Galileo starts to teach him, Sarti tries to shut it down. This strictness is shown throughout media today - “Mom said no” is a common phrase said within movies and television series. Not all mothers are strict; they are just trying to do what they think is best for their child.

Women in Earnest have similar misrepresentations to those in Galileo, although Oscar Wilde had a different agenda. While Brecht’s stereotypes were not necessarily created as purposefully, Wilde’s were created as a over-exaggeration - he desired to point out these stereotypes. Lady Bracknell, for example, is strict (and perhaps even a golddigger). Through the duration of the play, she is against Jack and Gwendolen’s marriage. Jack does not have the money that Lady Bracknell desires; she does not wish for someone of such low income to enter her family. The idea of a woman being “dependent on a male breadwinner” is a common occurrence in everyday media - one that often does not sit well with females. The youngest females in the play are also filled with misrepresentations - both Cecily and Gwendolen are gullible. As stated in Finney’s piece, both girls “have always longer to marry a man named Ernest” (643). Falling into the stereotype of gullibility, both ladies quickly believe that their beloved is indeed named Ernest. Wilde’s intentions come to light throughout his show- he brings forth comical elements while also showing how ridiculous these representations of genders happened to be during the 1890’s.

Female characters are not the only ones who are misrepresented within these plays - the men are overwhelmingly stereotyped as well. In Galileo, all men, to at least some extent, are shown to have power over other characters. Galileo clearly has an influence over Sarti, Andrea and Virginia - all will do his bidding without much complaint [e.g. Virginia immediately attending to the geese] (Brecht 74). This power is played with often in media, though often to a more sexual extent. Jokes such as ‘“if I poke her with it, it’ll put her in the mood”’ are seen heavily on platforms like Facebook and Twitter, indicating that even in a more intimate setting men have the power (Drakett et. al. 116). This is not always true. Several characters also show power over Galileo, such as: the Bursar, the Philosopher, and the Mathematician. While these power dynamics are more realistic (a boss to an employee) they are still hyperbolised - at least in relation to today’s media. A boss (or someone equivalent to it) isn’t likely to call their employee out in front of other people, like the Bursar does to Galileo in scene three. Although Galileo insists that his companion stay in the room, most boss-like figures would wait until another given time (or at least let them down a little easier). This type of content helps “legitimise the importance of heteronormative, masculinised traits in leadership roles”, as in the time this play was written, it would extremely unlikely for a role like the Bursar to be played by a female (Drakett et. al. 118). In media, the role of the boss, to this day, is still usually portrayed by a male actor where the character is straight, powerful, and intelligent.

While the men in Earnest are also depicted as smart and dominant, it is pushed past that; they are manipulative liars. Algernon and Jack spend the second act of the play convincing their loved ones that their names are Ernest. “The only earnestness here lies in the homophonous name ‘Ernest’” (Finney 643). Finney’s words speak truth - both Jack and Algernon are willing to lie to get what they would like from Gwendolen and Cecily. When the girls discover that Jack and Algernon have been lying, the men are quick to say that they will be Christened; they are willing to change their names to get to their end goal: marriage (Wilde 166). This could be played off as taking a sacrifice for the sake of their relationships, but with how quickly the girls forgive them, it is clear that there is something more to it. Their forgiveness can easily be interpreted as fear - they must forgive quickly to avoid further disagreement.

The interactions between the genders in Earnest and Galileo further prove that gender binaries are misrepresented in both shows. During scene eight of Galileo, Ludovico enters for a quick visit. Sarti quickly exits at Galileo’s command, and Virginia takes her leave by saying “I’ll show you my wedding dress” - a hyper-feminine reason to exit. As per usual, Ludovico and Galileo start a more detailed conversation after both women have exited the stage (Brecht 50). Brecht is using the lack of female characters in the scene to “‘re-macsulinise’ identities, roles and spaces” (Drakett et. al. 118). Within this scene, it seems as if Brecht was trying to state that important dialogue could only happen when a woman was not present. The women seem to only appear within a scene to further amplify a man’s masculinity - they are there to be bossed around [e.g. “Bring a jug of sicilian wine…” (Brecht 50)].

Conversations in Earnest are no better. When Cecily and Gwendolen first interact, they are volatile towards one another because they are afraid that they are engaged to the same man. Realistically, these types of conversations are few and far between - many females are likely to approach their significant other before bickering with another woman about something that may not even be true. Another unrealistic conversation is shown between Algernon and Cecily in Act II (Wilde 149-152). While intended to be comical, Cecily’s persistence and Algernon’s eagerness to accept her story border on mental disorders. Having mental disorders in a play isn’t necessarily a misrepresentation when done well, but all the characters are so well-spoken that it is clear that that is not Wilde’s intention. He is over-exaggerating the idea of a couple in love to the point where it is almost stalker-like.

Both The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde and A Life of Galileo by Bertolt Brecht are plays that heavily misrepresent binary gender and gender roles. Unfortunately, these ideals of gender are still relevant in today’s media through advertisements and internet memes.  Through the overwhelming stereotypes of females, males and the two of them in conversation, it is clear that both Wilde and Brecht had an agenda (albeit quite different ones) - to overplay each gender.

Brecht, Bertolt. A Life of Galileo. Translated by Mark Ravenhill, Bloomsbury       Metheun Drama, 2015.

Drakett, Jessica et. al. “Old Jokes, New Media: Online Sexism and   Constructions of Gender in Internet Memes.” Feminism & Psychology, Volume   28, Number 1, 2018, pp. 109-127.

Finney, Gail. “Comparative Perspectives on Gender and Comedy: The   Examples of Wilde, Hofmannsthal, and Ebner-Eschenbach.” Modern Drama,   Volume 37, Number 4, Winter 1994, pp. 638-650.

Grau, Stacy Landreth and Yorgos C. Zotos. “Gender Stereotypes in Advertising:   A Review of Current Research.” International Journal of Advertising, Volume 35, Number 5, pp.761-770.

De Jun had his guitar up on his lap, messing around with a few chords. A hobby turned into a nervous tick. “I’m not ashamed of us Yang, you know that. I haven’t even told my mother yet. How am I supposed to-”

“I’m tired of hiding it. It’s been months.”

“Let me think about it, okay? We have a couple hours.” De Jun kept his gaze on the guitar, placing it back on its stand.

Yang Yang nodded, the disappointment clear on his face. “You know I won’t force you to do anything.”

“I know.” De Jun stood, moving from the desk he was sitting at, and joined Yang Yang on the bed. “Telling them all at once is just...scary.”

Yang Yang pulled De Jun into his arms, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “Whenever you’re comfortable.”

De Jun couldn’t understand how Yang Yang was so open about his sexuality. After years of trying to work up the courage to tell others, De Jun was still torn down by simple things - tweets and nasty comments. He knew his friends were supportive of Yang Yang, but he was afraid they wouldn’t support them together. As a couple.

“I want to do it,” he said, coming back from his thoughts.

Yang Yang glanced at him. “You do?”

“Telling people that I already know are supportive should be easier, right? I mean, they’re our friends.”

“Normally,” Yang Yang nodded, taking De Jun’s hand, and interlacing their fingers.  “I can’t tell you it’ll be easy Jun. I know it’s not. But I can assure you that I’ll be your number one supporter.”

“I promise, if not tonight, then soon.”

“Take as long as you need.”

***

De Jun started to get cold feet as they arrived at the bowling alley. Standing in the parking lot, he could see Yang Yang reaching for his hand. De Jun hesitated, looking around. He knew Yang Yang was excited to share their news. He didn’t want to ruin that.

“I’m worried…” De Jun muttered, letting Yang Yang take hold of his hand.

“You’ve got this.” Yang Yang reassured him.

De Jun gulped, nodding, and let Yang Yang lead him inside. They stepped towards the counter. He watched the cashier’s eyes flicker to their intertwined hands, and then back up at their faces.

“What size?” she asked, turning towards the cupboards filled with the ugly shoes.

Yang Yang stated the sizes for both of them, turning back towards De Jun. “See? People really don’t mind anymore.”

De Jun nodded. He could see their friends at the lane farthest away. They’d noticed that they’d arrived, and were waving, but they couldn’t quite see their connected hands. The cashier handed them their shoes, and De Jun took the opportunity to drop Yang Yang’s hand, grabbing the shoes instead. Leaving Yang Yang to pay, De Jun joined their other friends.

He sat himself down in one of the uncomfortable blue seats, and slid off his shoes to exchange them with the bowling ones. When Yang Yang had made his way over, De Jun turned to hand him the other pair. He was greeted with a cold stare.

De Jun turned away, pulling his foot up onto the chair to finish tying it. He knew Yang Yang would be upset if nothing was said about their relationship tonight. He just had to work up the courage to do it.

Ten caught on quickly. “Are you two fighting?” he whispered, slipping into the chair beside De Jun. Ten was usually a loud person, so hearing him speak in such a quiet voice confused De Jun. He noticed that Yang Yang was preoccupied, Yukhei teaching him an under-the-legs method of rolling the ball - much like how a child would roll it before they were strong enough to lift it.

Yukhei had invited them out and paid for three games in advance. The first few rounds were played in silence - at least by De Jun and Yang Yang. The only noise coming from their lane was Yukhei’s laughter, and Ten’s complaints of having to keep score. The music, however, was deafening. It sounded like an eighties playlist - fitting for the retro style of the bowling alley.

“No...no. We just stayed up late last night. Both of us are a little tired,” De Jun replied.

“He practically lives at your house now, doesn’t he?” Ten teased.

“I guess that’s what happens when you get close to someone,” De Jun said, glancing up at Yang Yang, smiling. He hoped that whatever was going to happen tonight wouldn’t change their dynamics too much.

“Hey, Yang Yang,” Ten raised his voice. “Are you heading to De Jun’s tonight?”

“Wasn’t planning on it. Why?” came Yang Yang’s reply.

De Jun frowned. He thought Yang Yang was. (It was a normal thing for them.)

“So how about a movie night? Like we used to before De Jun stole you away?” Ten teased. De Jun knew there was no malice behind his statement, but he couldn’t help but be upset - jealous even. Especially when Yang Yang agreed to go.

De Jun had been winning this game, but found his score plummeting. Every time he went up to take his turn, he felt dizzy - almost to the point of being nauseous.

“Man, are you sure you’re feeling alright? Normally you kick our asses,” Yukhei worried.

De Jun shrugged, glancing at the seat across from him, where Yang Yang was sitting. His boyfriend was avoiding his gaze, looking anywhere but at him “I’ll finish this game, but then I’ll probably head out.”

“Yeah, don’t push yourself, dude,” Yukhei said, patting De Jun on the shoulder.

De Jun nodded. They wrapped up the game pretty quickly. Yukhei had convinced Yang Yang and Ten to stay for another. Yang Yang didn’t even look at De Jun when he said goodbye - he offered only a half-hearted wave.

De Jun quickly made his way out, dropping his shoes off at the counter and thanking the cashier.

Stuffing his hands in his pocket, he stepped outside, glancing at the sky. The moon was full tonight. He’d have some light while walking home at least, since his ride - Yang Yang - had decided to go elsewhere. He made it about halfway - a good 25 minutes -  before receiving a text.

You promised me.

De Jun frowned, stopping in the middle of the sidewalk to reply.

You said I could take my time.

I’ve given you three months. I’m tired of having to stop myself from being close to you around them, De Jun. I’m around you all the time and they know I’m gay - they’re starting to get suspicious. I’m tired of telling my mother that I still have no one to bring around for holidays even though I do. I’m tired of lying to my best friends.

De Jun pocketed his phone, continuing his walk home, trying to decide what to say. He was afraid he’d make things worse.

He didn’t pull out his phone again until he was settled in bed. He missed another few messages.

De Jun, I can’t be with someone who has to hide all the time.

De Jun felt his chest tighten. I’ll tell them.

As much as I hate this limbo we’re in right now, I don’t want you to come out before you’re ready.

I don’t want to lose you.

De Jun quickly opened a group chat with Yukhei, Ten and Yang Yang. I have something to tell you guys.

He was met with rapid responses. Yang Yang stayed silent.

I wanted to tell you in person, but I chickened out. Again. But maybe it’ll be easier for me this way?

What is it? Yukhei pressed.

...I’m gay. And, uh, Yang Yang and I are dating?

It’s a question? Ten quickly shot back.

No it’s not a question! I’m just crazy nervous. Yang Yang was literally the only person who knew.

How long? Yukhei questioned.

De Jun didn’t like that he’d asked. Three months.

The chat went silent after that. They’d all seen the message, no one had replied. De Jun was praying that it was because they were all watching a movie, that something distracted them. But he knew better. They were upset that he’d waited so long, at the very least. He couldn’t tell what they thought about his sexuality - not based on the texts.

Maybe he’d made a mistake. Maybe he should’ve listened to his gut. He would’ve lost Yang Yang, but he might not have lost everyone.

De Jun went to bed, wondering if he’d wake up the next morning regretting coming out just as much.

***

The sound of his alarm woke him up - it’d been going off for almost ten minutes. De Jun groaned, shutting it off and dragging himself out of bed. He pulled his uniform out of the closet, dreading the fact that he had to go to work. Making his way to the bathroom, he caught sight of himself in the mirror. He looked like shit. His dark hair was sticking up - bedhead style -  and the bags under his eyes were larger than normal. He didn’t think sleeping alone would be that bad.

De Jun hoped that Yang Yang wouldn’t visit him. He normally stopped by on De Jun’s breaks to bring him lunch. But De Jun didn’t think he wanted to see him. Or any of his so called friend group for that matter.

Yang Yang still entered the cafe. He was wearing the same outfit he was yesterday. It was clear he hadn’t gone home.

“Can I take your order?” De Jun asked, forcing a smile as Yang Yang came to the counter. De Jun wished that he could turn him away.

“An americano, two cream, one sugar.” Yang Yang replied. Same as always. “And I’d like to talk to you.”

“I’m working.”

“You have break in five.”

De Jun sighed, but nodded. He shouldn’t avoid it. He turned away from the cash - no one else was in line - and started making Yang Yang’s drink. After letting a coworker know he was taking fifteen, he brought it out from behind the counter and joined Yang Yang at his table.

“What’s up?”

“I don’t think this,” Yang Yang stated, pointing between them, “is gonna work.”

De Jun froze, his gaze focused on a coffee stain on the table.He couldn’t look Yang Yang in the eye.

“If I stayed with you, I’d be losing my best friend.”

De Jun frowned. “So Ten isn’t okay with it?”

“He said you’ve been holding me back from being myself for the past three months. He’d said I’d changed for the worse,” Yang Yang sighed. “I think he’s right.”

“Okay,” De Jun breathed shakily. He couldn’t believe this. He stood up. “I’ve gotta get back to work.”

“You’re not upset?”

“Of course I’m upset, Yang Yang. But I’ve got a job to do, and I’m not going to lose it because I let my emotions get the better of me. Maybe we’ll talk later.” He knew that was unlikely. Ten always took priority. Who was he to get in the way of that? Ten had known Yang Yang for years - they were like brothers. De Jun only had a few measly months to compare to that.

De Jun walked behind the counter and took a deep breath, trying to convince himself that things would be okay.. Smiling sadly, he watched Yang Yang exit.