estelle

you lay her down carefully and tucked her blanket over her—a battlefield for mothers—and suddenly, she started stirring like she was about to cry again. you started rocking her crib and cooed 'mommy's here, it's okay' all over her, and finally, after a few grumbles, she settled down.

you stared at her anxiously for a moment, ready to cradle her back in your arms if she started looking for you again, but thankfully, she remained asleep in her crib. you heaved a sigh of relief for the umpteenth time now. hopefully, that would be the last attempt.

slowly, you backed away from the crib and walked towards your bed—a sight that never failed to make you happy—and gracefully, flopped down. you stared at the ceiling for a moment before closing your eyes and praying to the heavens to let you finally sleep. but you knew by the next hour, you would hear the wails of your daughter.

a beat passes. you're slowly drifting off to dreamland when you hear the door creak a bit too loudly for your liking. you chose to ignore it.

you could hear heavy thuds of footsteps; your eyebrow twitched, but still chose not to get up.

then a loud thump followed by an 'ow!' echoed, and your eyes snapped open.

"dear, could you please be quiet?!" you whisper-shouted.

lo and behold, it was your ever-so-graceful husband, zuko, who quickly apologized with a pained look. you closed your eyes back again, while you could hear some rustling of clothes before feeling a dip in the bed beside you. warm, toned arms pulled you into an embrace and a kiss landed on your forehead.

"how's izumi?" he whispered, tracing the noticeable swell under your eyes. "asleep" you murmured. he hummed in response and just started peppering you with kisses. normally, it would make you feel all giddy and excited, but the loud smack of his kisses makes you feel wary of the sound waking izumi up.

"could you please kiss me quietly?"

"is that even possible?"

"then, stop kissing me."

if you had your eyes open, you would see how he looked offended right now. "so now it's a crime to show my love to my wife?"

"it's a crime to be this loud."

after a few hushed bickering, both of you just stopped to sleep.

a minute passes…then a few…until it was almost an hour for the scheduled cry.

as if your body knew when your daughter would cry, you woke up and just right on time, you could hear the loud cries of your daughter.

you groaned and zuko seemed to stir awake from your daughter as well. when will you ever get to have a proper sleep?

"i'll go take care of her." you moved to get off the bed, but zuko's arms around you tightened. "no, you can go back to sleep. i'll take care of her." noting how his tired eyes mirror yours, you insisted. "no, i'll take care of her".

leaving no room for argument, you quickly got up and picked izumi up from her crib.

"it's okay now…" you rocked her in your arms, mindlessly humming a melody while your eyes grew tired by the minute. time has passed and you've been rocking her for a while now, but she still wouldn't stop crying. "izumi, mommy's here…" you heaved a frustrated sigh. she continued to wail louder and louder, and even started squirming and you've grown irritated at this point that you hadn't noticed your voice grew louder too. "izumi, why won't you li—"

a hand came up behind you, startling you. it was zuko. you hadn't noticed he got up from the bed.

"hey, you alright?" he had a worried look.

you sighed, rubbing your eyes. "i'm fine." he looked at you for a moment; it's obvious he doesn't believe you.

he soothed your back in silence, watching izumi squirm and cry. his gaze settled to yours, noting your irritated yet tired look. "here, let me." you shook your head, "it's okay, I can do it. you have a lot of things to do tomorrow." izumi seemed to disagree as she started thrashing and wailing as if she didn't want to be in your arms. "izumi—" zuko could feel that you were about to explode.

he called your name. "she' can feel you, you know." you turned to look at him, eyebrows furrowed. "she's scared of you." zuko extended his arms out in silent invitation. you were reluctant for a moment, but you were tired of trying to figure her out, so you handed her over to him. he started slowly swaying her in his arms, littering her little face with kisses. "hush now, izumi, let your mother sleep now."

you watched them, noticing how her loud cries died down to sobs. zuko smiled down at her, wiping the tears streaming down her cheeks. your heart felt heavy yet lifted at the sight, the feeling of blue starting to creep up to you. now you can't believe you almost lashed out on her.

are you really a good mother for izumi?

zuko noticed the doubtful look you had, and as if he knew what you were thinking, he kissed your forehead like he was silencing your thoughts. "hey, you're a great mother." you looked at him, your eyes felt prickly. his other arm pulled you in for an embrace while the other was holding your daughter, "and a loving wife I could ever ask for."

his words made you feel even more emotional as you felt your mouth quivering, tears building up in your eyes. your daughter looked at you curiously with those amber eyes that resembled zuko's while you sniffled on your husband's chest, her stubby arms reaching out and tapping your shoulders.

you noticed and leaned in to kiss her arms softly making izumi giggle with her gummy smile out. zuko grabbed her chubby hand and patted them on your cheek, while speaking with an obnoxious high-pitched voice, "sorry for waking you up, mama." you smiled at him in humor.

feeling that you seemed to calm down, he gently held your hand and lead you back to your shared bed. he laid izumi down between the two of you, tucking her with her blanket. you watched him hum her to sleep, his hand caressing her dark baby hairs.

is it possible to fall in love with him all over again?

both of you watched her go to sleep as you properly tucked her sprawled limbs underneath the blanket. zuko looked at you for a moment and whispered, "are you alright now?" you hummed in response, whispering a thanks to you. afraid to wake izumi up, you felt that you hadn't expressed your gratitude enough so you smothered every part of his face with your kisses, to which he wholeheartedly accepted. once again, you're remined yourself how much of a blessing it was to marry zuko as you continued to pepper kisses on his face.

…

"......could you please kiss me quietly?"

"oh, shut up."

and for what felt so long, you finally get to sleep feeling loved by your own family.

author's note: bye i just reread it im so sorry the pacing is ass, i literally just wrote this in a rush for mother's day which btw, happy mother's day everyone !! i wanted to highlight mothers' struggles n appreciate their strength but i captured it horribly gosh i suck writing angst cuz wdym it was suddenly okay??? time to suffer in uni before i get to even post my zuko songfic credits: @uzmacchiato for the lovely gold divider