uh it's memes. by seashell.

quotes from new girl's background check. change pronouns. change words. idc.

cool! not weird at all.

i'm going to the outlet mall today.

i'm gonna look like a rich person from three years ago.

remember, he handcuffed his cat's paw to a radiator and then lost the key!

i'm pretty sure they call her the fish because she's tough but fair. just like most fish i've interacted with.

it pairs very nicely with citrus, you oaf.

what are you afraid of? they'll look through your dream journal?

find it, get rid of it. find it, get rid of it.

these are my bad decision hats. bad decision, right?

how good could a waffle really be? that's a question i answered that day.

holy freaking what.

you guys are like rubbing alcohol. you sting me in the now but you save me in the later.

the only person who goes in there is me, when i'm naked. and or sad.

i found it on the lawn!

cover your ears and sing landslide.

i can see your lips moving.

_____'s a goner!

was that a joke? i hate jokes.

put it in the baggie!

that bird was going straight to hell.

i will ask you questions. you will ask me no questions.

no thanks, i've already had my grapes.

he's our resident clown here.

play along or ____ goes to jail.

would you like a green grape shoved - given to your mouth, handed to your mouth?

let me ask you something. breasts.

don't mind the condoms! we've been banging like rabbits ... not each other!

oh it's just a bunch of clanging.

i've had intercourse in there, you'll be excited to know.

(badly and incorrectly singing to landslide)

don't listen to him he's deranged!

i've never seen someone sweat so much in my life. it looks like your body is crying.

forget my face!

i didn't think there was anything you could do.

i didn't think you'd make it this far.

maybe i'm not supposed to be a ____.

there's no reason you should lose your job too.

somebody bring me handcuffs. i'm guilty.

you will not move. you will not talk. you will not think, unless they're thoughts about not moving.

you would've made someone really lucky to have you as a partner.

the job really gets to you, you know?

for what it's worth, i did it. i kept a secret.

congratulations, ____. you have the willpower of a six year old.

consists of things said in the discord group chat and put in the hall of fame. change pronouns. do whatever. just don't claim as your own. thanks.

well call sondheim 'cause into the woods we go.

sorry to call you ellen degeneris

do you have to cook your beef on the grill of my consciousness?

i'm criminally stupid and the cops are after me.

tell the lord i am tired of these trials.

i would've bludgeoned myself to death with an unbent frying pan.

this conversation is happening in your head across state lines.

that's not a vintage, that's antifreeze.

he looks like if pinocchio made it to adulthood.

i don't have time for sedimentallity.

i'm gross and this is what i deserve.

you expect me to care about people who live in ____?

he got a robotic arm, which was delivered to him by dan stevens.

google, can you lock pop and drop it? or do i have to pick one.

what if i spoke like charles dickens wrote? which was being paid by the word.

i wouldn't trade you for the world but i need strangers to validate me on the internet.

i am mentally unwell. i'm going to go eat skittles on the toilet.

tell your dad to call me if he wants his baby teeth back.

mm, that feels gaslighty and wrong.

are you a pet store being robbed? because you are fish taken.