sierra

I don't know if too many radfems have actually met a trans person irl or even attempted to talk to them. You would be shocked by how many trans people, and specifically trans women, champion women's liberation. But you would never know that if you shut yourself inside your "gender critical" bubble. And what happens when a trans woman tries to speak about feminism and women's lib? Well, no one wants to listen because they're trans. They couldn't possibly know anything about being a woman so anything they say is invalid. Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

But the thing is, is that my advocacy for other groups of people isn't dependent on how much they advocate for me. If I see a group of people in need, I don't ask them to first advocate for me before I help them. I'm starting to think that the meaning of social justice has shifted from advocating for minority groups unconditionally to advocating for minority groups, only if they show me they're worthy first.

How many times do we have to go over that trans women are not some covert operation by the patriarchy to take down women or whatever bullshit conspiracy is popular now. They aren't all woman hating cross dressers who seek to destroy womanhood. They aren't incels who transition just to get some imaginary social clout.

There are absolutely trans women out there who are disturbingly misogynistic and think they have an excuse to do it because they're trans, there is no denying that. But there are also cis women who are disturbingly misogynistic and think they get a pass because they're cis women.

Last Saturday I was sat at the top of a mountain after a hike (pictured below because it's too gorgeous not to share) and my mom called me. Without even thinking, I picked up the phone and informed her that I was on top of a mountain and unfortunately I couldn't meet up with her before she left town. And as I said that, I just got so blown away by how fucking cool it was that I could have a phone conversation miles into the wilderness on a mountaintop.

Technology can be annoying and cumbersome and sometimes just plain unnecessary but man it is still really cool we have these things

Picture of the view from said mountaintop:

I know the world is filled with terrors beyond our comprehension and it's hard to see that there are still lots of good, or even just neutral, people in the world. A lot of people do have other's best intentions in mind it's just hard to see when we have a cloud of suspicion and pessimism around us.

I think there may be a correlation between social media normalizing reading people's innermost thoughts day in and day out. It's not necessarily a bad thing, it's just a new way of communicating. I mean, I'm doing it right now. But to see people's bad faith takes and negative perceptions about people and the world all the time as a whole can't be doing us any favors.

I even catch myself doing this, I assume that everyone will be agro assholes (just like they are online) when usually the worst is someone who is mildly pissed off.

When I went to my volunteer interview at the LGBT center I was wracked with nerves because I assumed, for some reason, that I would be quizzed on LGBT vocabulary and history and flag colors and pronouns and if I failed they would shame me and reject me for being a "fake queer". Of course, they were just happy to have a new face with some previous volunteer experience.

Yesterday, a guy came up to me at the gym and I silently freaked out, assuming he was going to be a creep. Turns out, he wanted to compliment me on my precise timing between sets because he doesn't see too many people do that.

A woman dresses and acts in a traditionally feminine way so obviously she's been brainwashed by the patriarchy to perform these behaviors. She is so stupid and incompetent that she cannot tell the difference between what makes her confident and happy and what is societal pressure.

A woman dresses and acts in a traditionally masculine way so obviously she's a pick me and hates other women. She is so filled with internalized misogyny that she can't see how wonderful and empowering being feminine is and she is betraying her sisters by not participating in traditional womanhood.

An unfortunate truth about true women's liberation is letting women dress and act the way they want to, even if it makes you uncomfortable or upset. Psychoanalyzing every breath a woman takes, every action as either directly feminist or anti feminist is exhausting and so fucking unnecessary. Sometimes women just exist without making a feminist statement.

Its especially weird when the woman in question is someone you don't know, who didn't ask to get a feminist think piece written on her supposed internalized misogyny because she wore a pink dress or basketball shorts in public.

Like yes, we as women should be aware of how our actions are potentially influenced by societal factors. That's not something exclusive to women though, that's for EVERYONE to be aware of. Especially in the age of social media and "influencers" our actions and opinions can be swayed by these people online.

It's more than just how we dress or the ratio of male to female friends we have or what fucking food we eat (because I guess there's a whole online debate about "pick me" girl foods or some bullshit). It's how we treat other women, how we help each other, how we educate ourselves, how we advocate for ourselves.