took these screenshots for people like me who would rather just know how to opt out than read several paragraphs on corporate greed

Jimmy Eat World
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

if i look back, i am lost
Game of Thrones Daily
noise dept.

oozey mess
Today's Document
Cosmic Funnies

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
Noah Kahan

Discoholic 🪩
𓃗

gracie abrams
Claire Keane
almost home
YOU ARE THE REASON
seen from Germany
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seen from Brunei

seen from Canada
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seen from China
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@sapphicsarcastic
took these screenshots for people like me who would rather just know how to opt out than read several paragraphs on corporate greed

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This isn't going to become some anomalous method of arresting people. They will be shocking people like this as a matter of course.
Luckily thick clothing will insulate you from the shock.
They will 100% use this to torture people they're trying to arrest, and then when people struggle in response to the pain they will use that automatic human response as an excuse to execute them in the streets. absolutely insane to even consider giving this to any cop, let alone ICE!
another defense against this is a gun
what the actual fuck
This kind of thing wouldn't be socially acceptable to do with photoshop and all of a sudden people think this is okay?
I offered to come check on my friend's animals while she's away for the long weekend
She thinks I'm joking
But I'm ready
Wait. Are there 200, but to be numbered 1-250? Did I read those tags right? 😲
Yes there are actually 202 of them, the company sent 2 extra in the package, and I will be numbering them on the bottom with sharpie marker 1-250. This will ensure even if she manages to find all 202, she will never truly stop feeling like there might be a tiny duck somewhere unknown in the house. Lurking. Waiting to appear at the strangest time.
#sometimes you must be gently evil to your friends#so they know you love them enough
very very important
hey op i don't think those are frogs like you said
they're right those arent frogs op.
I meant to prank my friend by hiding hundreds of small ducks after saying I would hide small frogs, but it turns out due to some quirk of only 3 people on the entire Internet knowing what a prank is, it seems I have pranked hundreds of other people by saying I would put 100 small frogs in my friends house, when in fact the prank was that it was 202 small ducks.
an update. it has been over 4 months and they are still finding ducks
1 year and 7 months later:
#imagine the dread she felt when she found the first duck and realized op wasn't joking (via @robyn-goodfellowe)
The key to a good prank, imo, is that the person you're pranking should not feel bad. They should feel delight. My friend has 2 kids. She walked in the door from her vacation, and instead of having two cranky children to deal with as soon as she got home on top of everything else, she got two children excited to run around finding small ducks. My friend knows me well enough to know that when I say weird things there's always a chance I'm not joking, and she would have said no (and been respected) if she didn't want this. The prank was never that I was hiding the toys, just which toys they were, and how many would be hidden.
it's so hardcover –> we're so paperback
this post is making me pronounce hardcover in a way i never considered

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Woman murders man in broad daylight
when the character is obsessive and desperate and guilty and scared and ashamed and traumatized and repressed
*this meeting could have been an email voice* this cgi could have been a puppet
Your maternal grandfather:
Fuck that dude
Meh (leaning negative)
Meh (leaning positive)
Love that dude
I don't know her
Another nuance
Your paternal grandfather
Fuck that dude
Meh (leaning negative)
Meh (leaning positive)
Love that dude
I don't know her
Another nuance
"I CANT HANDLE THIS" *handles this*
"I CANT TAKE ANOTHER DAY" *takes another day*

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Every time amber heard gets brought up as the butt of a joke I am obviously expected to agree with and accept, I face this internal battle. Like it’s often this aside in conversation where I don’t want to derail the larger point, depending on the person. But also. Did you know it was a civil case? Did you know she was sued over the op-Ed about dv that did not mention Depp by name? Did you know about their age gap when they first met? Did you know about his extensive, and expensively suppressed, history of violence and abuse? Did you know about the perfume in the bathroom during the trial? Have you read The Gift of Fear (and thus know that certain abusers prolong abuse within the courts)? Did you ever consider that the inundation of reels and other short form videos during that joke of a trial, was by design? Did you know I don’t much use Facebook, or YouTube, but whether logged out or logged in, all my suggestions were cruelly mocking her?? Did you know about the Saudi money? Did you know we all have a predisposition to savage women? Did you know we are all excited when we have an excuse to direct misogyny towards a rationalized target? Did you know expressing misogyny is conditioned to inherently feel good? Did you ever wonder if you fell for a scheme on a scale beyond the comprehension of the ordinary individual, within scope, expense, and effort? Nah she’s probably just a bitch.
Reading about an arsenic murder case in which probably a daughter killed her mom with poisoned clam chowder but she was acquitted because the defense were like “can you prove that ANYONE wouldn’t die after eating takeout clam chowder delivered by children in August? In 1896?” and the jury were like no yeah fair point I too have had clam chowder stomach
faqs:
is this real? / i thought pro wrestling was fake? wrestling is 'fake' in that the fights are choreographed and the winner is predetermined, but the physicality is very real. there's no way to 'fake' getting whipped with a metal chain so hard it leaves welts.
why ARE they chained? this is a specialty fight called a 'dog collar match' where both participants are, you guessed it, fitted with dog collars which are then chained together.
is this legal? / how can this be allowed? why wouldn't it be? they're both consenting adults who planned and agreed to it.
but they could be seriously hurt! they know, and they accept the risk. pro wrestlers are well aware of the injuries possible in their line of work, and they do it anyway because they're crazy people.
IS there aftercare? of a sort, yeah - there's a medical team on hand to patch everyone up, and lots of coworkers backstage to give them a 'job well done!'
why are they wearing thigh highs? they're kneepads/shin guards for protection. looking like sexy thigh highs is just a bonus side effect!
ok, but why's that guy in a shiny speedo? personal preference. wrestlers can design their own outfits and some prefer full coverage long tights, while others wear less to show off the gams.
is that cm punk? yup! he unretired last year.
why do straight men watch this? i'm still trying to figure this one out. 🤷
#is this just kinky as hell to anyone else or like#is that just me?
Nah mate two half-naked muscular men chained together by their dog collars whipping the shit out of each other with chains in a ritualised power struggle with a predetermined dominator and submitter of the interaction in a public ring is wholesome family entertainment
had to share this
In every way this is set up to be a joke like any other short video, it even uses the trope of main character in a wig to represent their mom, but it isn't funny at all. It's just sweet and nice

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GOUGAR CLAIMS COOL ROCK
God forbid women do anything
She had a good time, too
i really love this piece - bird window collision deterrents should absolutely be mandatory for large buildings not only in NY, but nationwide. designing architecture to not kill the world around us should be the norm.
don’t leave this in the comments!
If anyone is looking for ideas, Chicago Bird Collision Monitors has done decades of advocacy work in this area and fought for real improvements in saving birds. Their work on lights-out and preventing window strikes have had a big impact on the local ecosystem.