this is me overthinking

the line "I'm so depressed I act like it's my birthday everyday" is so brilliant because when you're depressed, you make excuses the same way you do when it's your birthday (I don't have to clean or exercise on my birthday, I can eat cake for all my meals on my birthday, I can stay in bed and do nothing all day because it's my birthday). And when it is your birthday, it's fine to have an off day of celebration. But when it's everyday, it goes from indulgence to self-neglect. But then the line itself seems so joyful "it's my birthday everyday" gives such a positive vibe, which makes the true meaning even more sad and sinister

people confused if songs are about matty or joe but the “went from an oven to a microwave” is pretty cut clear that they both hurt her in similar ways and that the songs are muddled and confusing cause it was confusing for her. we never fully know which one she’s talking about cause they both hurt her so similarly she can weave the pain together

wait hi let's revisit that maroon mention that was insane

Hoax was the blueprint for ttpd (messy, blurry lines between multiple muses, confusing, lore to be unpacked for centuries to come)

i think a lot of people are missing the point of the songs. the person behind the pronoun keeps changing. she’s expressing her feelings about joe via matty. for example in fortnight imo “all of this to say, i hope you’re okay, but you’re the reason, and no one here's to blame, but what about your quiet treason?” is about joe and then “and for a fortnight, there we were, forever running, till you sometimes ask about the weather, now you’re in my backyard, turned into good neighbors” is about matty, and the “i love you, it’s ruining my life” is about both of them. also, based on your interpretation, you could switch people around to fit these songs because it seems they’re a lot alike… a lot of what she’s trying to say is “what happened between us [her & joe] drove me to be insane” and the insane part happened with matty, hence, he’s in all these songs. i think we need to think of these songs in hoax light aka about 2 or people at once

i can picture john mayer one hour and fifty nine minutes into tortured poets. he’s about to let out a sigh of relief. he hears taylor singing about his french press.

Taylor calls herself crazy all throughout TTPD, but maybe I’m just as insane because I actually think she’s quite normal? Because if I ended a once happy 8 year relationship because the love was gone and we were both no longer in love to then get with a situation-ship who has been pinning for you for years only for them to abandon you when they finally got you, I’d commit full arson.