𝑬𝒏𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒔

John Logan had been avoiding his girlfriend, Sidney since she got back after Thanksgiving.

Garrett had tried helping, despite the consuming thoughts of his dad's new girlfriend and the bruises staining her wrists and possibly other parts of her body.

He concluded that his best friend's relationship would heal itself.

So, currently, he was focusing on himself, happily being treated to a date by Hannah as they sat beside each other, tucking into their food in Carver Hall.

The rustic chalet-style, the high ceilings, wood panelled walls, and ornate light fixtures that cast a soft yellow glow over the room, completely contrasting the other meal halls.

Hannah loved it.

And so did he.

Well, until his friends spotted them, smiling when they stood on the opposite side of the table.

"Wellsy," Dean placed his tray in front of her, "Saw you guys on Fifth Line."

"Is Jules—" Hannah pulled a face.

"They're everywhere," Dean voiced.

Tucker promptly sat between Logan and Dean, not risking another punch up.

"Like God," Logan added, pulling out his seat.

Garrett expressed, "We're supposed to be on a date."

"Oh, wow, you really splurged, G." Logan joked, sitting down.

Hannah bashfully interrupted, "This one was my treat."

Logan's eyes widened, before he smiled, "Oh, then, rescinded."

"So, how was y'all's break?" Tucker's questioned, looking between the couple.

But Logan's attention was suddenly pulled away.

He found Sidney across the hall.

She was in her gym clothes, walking through the rows of tables, holding her large bottle of water.

Damn, she looked beautiful.

Following his gaze, Hannah lit up.

"Sid!" Hannah called her off, unaware of the simmering tension.

Sidney slowly strolled over, hands tightening around her water bottle as she finally stood before the group.

"Oh, hey guys," She greeted.

"Sidney," Tucker waved.

"Watkins," Garrett smiled.

Dean nodded in acknowledgement, whilst Logan suddenly averted his gaze.

Hannah asked, "How was your Thanksgiving?"

"Could've been better," she grumbled, attempting to smile.

Tucker teased, "You get anymore merch from your dad?"

Sidney didn't pick up on his teasing, "Oh, should I?"

Tucker flushed, and Dean jumped in, "He's kidding."

"Oh, right sorry."

"You're not gonna join us?" Hannah encouraged, nodding to the seat next to her.

"Umm..." Sidney's expectant gaze drifted over to her boyfriend who wasn't looking at her. "Logan... can you talk now?"

Unlike the medical room, he was much more hesitant and harsh. "I can't right now, I'm eating."

Garrett's brows pulled together, and he kicked Logan under the table, who reacted with a small glare when he looked up from playing with his food.

Sidney’s lips thinned into a line and her head softly bopped.

"Right, well, I guess I'll head to the weight room," she said.

"Have fun." Logan muttered, making her shoulders sink.

"I'll see you guys later."

Sidney subtly rolled her eyes and walked away, not looking back to see Logan wistfully staring after her.

Hannah's lips curled into a frown, "What was that?"

"Dean, wanna say what that was?" Logan tutted, and the blond in question let his fork clatter against his tray.

Dean awkwardly scratched at his forehead, "He um... Logan found out about Sidney and me dating back in sophomore year."

Hannah's eyes shot out of her head when she turned back to her boyfriend, "Wait, what?"

Tucker answered for Garrett, "That’s why I’m the human buffer today."

"And you're mad at her, why?" Hannah faced Logan in confusion.

Logan replied as if it were obvious, "She kept it a secret."

"So did Dean and you're being cordial."

Logan was doing that because he had to.

Not because he wanted to.

Garrett muttered against his cup, "And you left her in her room crying when you found out."

Hannah looked annoyed.

Dean's stare dropped to his food tray, whilst Tucker subtly shook his head.

"Dude," Logan scoffed.

Hannah leaned forward, eyes widening in shock, "You did what?"

"You did." Garrett insisted, holding his best friend's irritated stare, "She should've told you yes, but she didn't keep it from you to hurt you. She was probably trying to avoid this situation entirely. It's messy. You don't do messy."

"I... just don't know what to say." Logan voiced, running a hand over his face, then spared a glance at Dean.

"Instead you and Dean beat the crap out of each other on the ice and play nice on land, whilst your girlfriend is losing her mind."

Tucker sucked his teeth, "Sounds pretty fucked up."

Garrett added, “Besides we all know you can’t function without her.”

“I’m fine," Logan argued.

No one was convinced.

lumberjack 😏

picking you up in five.

siren ✨

i have to cancel, sorry.

not feeling too good.

lumberjack 😏

are you okay? what's

the matter?

siren ✨

bad camps, nothing

to worry about.

read

"So no third date?" Trinity asked, when she walked out of her bedroom, ready to go out, to see Sidney curled up on the sofa.

"How can I in this state?" Sidney groaned, looking every bit exhausted. "Plus I feel like I'm gonna pass out. I wanna pass out."

"Go back to sleep okay." Sidney leaned on the back of the sofa, and gently touched her arm, "Did he respond?"

Sidney scoffed, "Nope, I was aired, just like I expected, once he saw the word 'cramps' he was out."

"Men."

"Exactly."

The sudden knock at the door drew their attention as Trinity grabbed her sneakers off the shoe rack.

"Did you order something?" Sidney asked, as she forced herself to get up and stroll over to the door.

"Nope."

When Sidney swung the door open she was stunned to see Dean on the other side.

"Dean? What are you doing here?" She noticed the big paper bag he held with one arm. "And what's all this?"

"You said you had cramps," Dean answered as if it were obvious.

"Bad cramps."

"Bad cramps and I bought these," he said, gesturing to the bag.

She stepped aside, letting him stroll in as the door clicked behind him.

His gaze lingered on her stripped pyjamas and fuzzy slippers.

He grinned, before catching the hard stare of her friend.

"She cancelled the date,” Trinity deadpanned, now comfortably wearing her sneakers.

Realisation dawned on Dean, "You must be Trinity."

"You must be Dean,” She drily said.

"I certainly am." Dean nodded, "So here, I bought this for your best friend." He walked over to the small dining table and set down the bag. "So we can stay in."

Sidney trudged after him, "We?"

"You and me, yes," he said in that obvious tone again.

"Why?" he turned, to look down at her confused face.

"Because Sidney Watkins, you like my company. And I really like yours," he answered, rolling up his sleeves.

"I'm on my period," She stated seriously.

"I'm aware."

"I'll groan in pain, possibly fall asleep and even drool."

"I have painkillers, a sturdy shoulder to sleep on and even a couple of packs of tissues."

He also had an assortment of snacks and winged period pads, that he promptly took out, surprising her.

Trinity who watched it all, sighed, "Let him stay, I need to do some groceries." That made them turn around, but she quickly jabbed her finger in his direction, "Guard her with your life."

Her narrowed stare didn't leave Dean until she left with the door clicking behind her.

Sidney quietly laughed, when Dean turned back to her.

"Well, she's intense," he commented.

"She's my best friend and very protective, like me," Sidney defended, drawing an endearing smile.

"Something to look forward too?"

Sidney giggled.

He loved the sound.

Her hand lightly graced over the products, "You didn't have to go through all this trouble."

"It was no trouble, I do this for my sister."

"Summer?"

"You remembered."

She hummed, "Her competitive edge left an impression. A good one, come on, you can choose what to watch because I won't be paying attention."

When Dean crossed the threshold of her dorm room, he was welcomed by the sounds of Distant Lover by Marvin Gaye. A fluffy rug rested on one side of her double-sized bed, whilst framed pictures of her friends and family were clustered over her dresser and posters were stuck to the wall. Meghan the Stallion and Ari Lennox were some to name a few, whilst the citrus aroma wafted around him.

“Too busy looking at me?" He joked.

“Too busy trying not to die.” She retorted, grateful for the reinforcements. “Painkillers, I just ran out so thank you.”

He watched as she took one, with the glass of water that she kept on her bedside table.

“Don’t have to thank me.” He replied, with a shrug. "Nice room."

The lilac walls and bed spread was cute to him.

But before he even tried to near the bed, she held up her hand.

“Take off your shoes white boy," his gym shoes were still comfortably on.

He mockingly gasped, “I’m not an animal.”

“And because you’re in your outside clothes, so you’re not getting between my sheets.”

Sidney couldn't wait to collapse on her bed, and climb into the sheets, moving her laptop out of the way just before he fell next to her after kicking off his shoes.

“Better?” He asked.

“Better.” She nodded, then set up her laptop between them, with the various snacks he bought on either side.

She watched as he typed a movie... Top Gun.

Sidney was far from impressed, but decided she would endure the action flick, since she had more than enough painkiller stop knock herself out.

But before he could press play, his phone buzzed.

And then again.

And then again, confusing her as she bit into a chocolate bar.

Dean cringed when he caught the names on his phone, then his gaze darted to Sidney who stared expectantly.

She laughed, although it was a bit forced.

“Puck bunnies?” She joked, watching as he turned off his phone and chucked it down the bed.

“Not anymore.”

Sidney laughed again, but amusement wiped off her face when she realised he was serious.

“Wait seriously?" She suddenly glared, "You’re entertaining them but you would’ve been on a date with me if I didn’t cancel.”

“Technically you didn’t cancel," Dean's teasing didn't land well.

“Technically I could kick you out and block you," Sidney's jaw tightened when she put down her food.

“You’re mad?” Dean's smile faltered when her glare didn't fade. “Wait, are we fighting?”

“No." Sidney waved him off, and faced the laptop, "Just play the movie.”

Dean leaned forward, trying to gain her attention, “Sidney, I’m not entertaining them.”

Besides, one was a freshman, and for all his manwhoring, he had a strict rule about not doing freshmen. After one little stalker incident at the start of the year, that lead a freshman to believe after a hookup that they were madly in love, it traumatised him enough that he left the freshman alone, deciding they were level ten clingers.

Sidney merely blinked at him.

“It doesn’t matter if you were, we’re not together. And this isn’t serious right?"

He stiffened, “That feels like a trick question.” When she didn't respond, he added, “Look, girls pop up all the time. If I wasn’t seeing you, I would respond. But I’m not.”

Sidney drawled, “I’m so lucky.”

“And you’re jealous.”

Finally she turned to him.

Amusement washed over his face.

The motherfucker was amused.

“I’m irritated," She snapped, shaking her head at the audacity of this guy.

Dean couldn't help himself, “And you’re hot when you are.”

Sidney's face fell, and she turned back to the laptop. Her hands reached for another snack. She ate, needing to push down whatever she felt, scared that it was too strong, when she prayed it wasn't. It fucking couldn't be.

This was Dean Di Laurentis.

The guy who wasn't a serious person.

The guy who wasn't supposed to be in a relationship.

The guy who wasn't meant for her.

Dean swallowed the knot forming in his throat, and reached for his phone again, drawing her frustrated expression.

“Tell me, if you want them all gone I’ll block every one from my phone and change my number.”

The graveness in his tone, made Sidney recoil.

His eyes flashed with earnestness, and there was no sign of banter or jest on his face.

Still, Sidney couldn't trust it, her wariness pinched at her thick brows and tugged her lips into a frown.

“I’m serious," Dean stated.

“You’re not,” Sidney scoffed.

He argued, “You don’t want me to be.”

Sidney's lips thinned.

Did I want him to be? She didn't want the question to swarm her mind much longer.

“Good time not long time remember." A tight smile contorted her face. She grabbed his phone and tossed it back to where it was, much to his surprise. "I shouldn’t have reacted like that.”

Dean clicked his tongue, eying her sudden change in attitude. The previous anger in her eyes excited him, elating him in ways he didn't know possible.

“I don’t mind that you did.” he shifted closer, flashing her a smile, “Plus you’re in pain so it’s justifiable.”

Silence stretched between them.

Dean made the first move, grabbing the laptop and pressing play.

Boldly, his arm wrapped around her shoulders, and her head tucked into the crook of his neck, as she sighed into the embrace.

Sidney found herself eating chocolate, then mindlessly feeding Dean.

From stifling her jealousy to somewhat embracing her untapped feelings in only a matter of minutes.

She couldn't help but think of the puck bunnies.

They swarmed each player, ready to jump when they got the green light.

And she knew Dean had given clusters of them the green light since freshman year.

Gulping, Sidney craned her neck up to ask him, “Would you really do that?”

“What?” Dean eagerly met her gaze.

“Block every girl you used to fuck with on your phone and change your number, for me?”

Sidney felt sick even asking.

But she had to ask.

A warmth spread through his chest, her voice was quiet, almost shy, but revealed more than she'd admit.

“I would.”

Her breath hitched at his admission, then a glimmer grew in her eyes at the truth detailing his profile.

And what a beautiful profile he had.

His lips parted, when her fingers trailed off his chiselled jaw, then held his chin, before angling down his face as she stretched up.

She stretched up to kiss him, resting your hand on his chest.

Sidney’s lips were smooth and plump to perfection, they moulded against his almost carnal.

Her hand caressed his face before sliding behind his neck, the low sound he made her sit up, prompting him to lift her onto his lap, straddling his lap.

Dean gripped her waist, letting out a small groan when she licked over his lips.

"Fuck," he muttered, slipping his tongue into her mouth, and pulling her closer when their tongues tangled together. "Trouble."

A smile prodded her lips when he nipped one, making her tug at his hair.

Dean almost damn near moaned before Sidney pulled away.

Her grin taunted him.

“Blame that kiss on me being in pain." Sidney uttered, "A delirious kiss.”

“Oh, I love delirious kisses.” Dean pecked her a few times, growing more frustrated each time they were apart. “The best kinda kiss.”

His slowly dragging his fingers up and down her back, stroking until they grazed her ass.

"Careful," She playfully warned, "One delirious kiss and you're losing your mind."

"Let me Sid," He breathily chuckled, "Let me lose my mind."

Sidney smirked.

And then she kissed him again.

a/n:

"Baby, I need to finish packing," Sidney whispered against his lips, dazed by the hunger they shared, only to be interrupted by her packing for the weekend. She needed her toiletries and make-up bag, but every time she reached for them, Logan would tug her by the loops in her jeans and melt into a kiss. "Seriously."

"I'm helping," Logan muttered, sparing a glance at the suitcase before pecking the corner of her lips.

She suppressed a moan, feeling as though her legs would lose all feeling and that they'd end up where they were an hour ago; in bed, shrouded by sheets and pillows, whispers and whimpers

As much as it pained her, Sidney pushed him gently just to create some distance.

"You're kissing me," she had to look away from his flushed face and waving hair that was a mess.

"Which is helping."

He stepped closer, only to be interrupted by a knock on the main door to her shared dorm.

"Saved by the... knock?"

She lazily chuckled at his joke, "Let me get the door."

Logan ran a hand over his face when she stepped away.

His tongue swiped against his cheek when he watched her shuffle toward her door, "I'm gonna use the bathroom."

She glanced behind her, laughing in disbelief, "Really? You're turned on, again?"

"I actually need to pee," he weakly argued, walking backwards to her en-suite.

She raised a brow, "Oh?"

"And a cold shower."

She laughed, pulling open her bedroom door to the communal area, as she called out, "How will you survive without me; I'll never know." She then jogged over to the dormitory door and reached for the handle, startled by who she saw, "Dean? What are you doing here?"

Dean stood, uncharacteristically stern in the face, shoulders hunched and hands placed on either side of the door.

"I need to talk to you. Can I—"

Sidney quickly placed a hand on his chest, preventing him from stepping inside, then glanced behind her, somewhat relieved to know that her boyfriend was using the bathroom.

"No, Dean, we've talked about this," she said in a hushed whisper.

Dean lightly scoffed, "We haven't, not the way I need to. You just blocked me out of nowhere."

"I told you why." Her shoulders sank a little.

"But you won't admit it's because you had feelings for me!" Dean exclaimed, louder than he wanted, but all the frustration was bubbling over. He understood that back then he wasn't boyfriend material, but they had a good time, got to know each other deeply, and then, suddenly, they were strangers. "The thought of you feeling something— anything for me disgusted you or something."

"I didn't disgust me!" Sidney snapped back.

Dean's glare faltered, he looked down, unsure, "Then what —"

"What the fuck?!"

Sidney's heart dropped at the sound of Logan's voice.

She spun on her feet to see the anger tear his expression first, and then hurt and then betrayal as his chest heaved and he began to bitterly stare at the two of them.

She rushed toward him, leaving Dean to shut the door behind them, regretful that he didn't see Logan before his outburst.

"Baby... I..." Sidney struggled to get the words out, as the throbbing in her eyes grew when he gazed upon her with such dejection.

"You and him?"

Sidney rapidly shook her head as the dread settled. "It was nothing."

"It didn't sound like nothing." Logan fought against the emotions creeping up his throat. He didn't look away from the tear-eyed woman in front of him, "Did you cheat on me?"

It hurt him to ask.

Sidney almost broke down at the question.

Her lip trembled when she answered almost instantly. "I would never."

"She wouldn't."

Dean's voice only angered Logan more.

"I'm not talking to you, you motherfucker!" Logan's yell pierced the room, pinning his friend to his place, before he turned back to his girlfriend. "When?"

Sidney sniffled, "Sophomore year. It was for like a month, and that was it."

A scoff escaped him when he turned away, looking up at the ceiling. And blinking back his tears.

All the stares, the silences, the awkwardness and the quiet intimacy, it all made sense.

It all clicked.

And it all made him sick.

"Oh my god, I knew something happened between you two, and you never told me?"

"I didn't... I didn't know how,” She frantically waved her hands around as the pressure amped up.

"Or you just didn't want me to find out," Logan muttered, rolling his eyes, much to her distress. He came closer, making her believe he would understand, only to grit out, "You let me think that you and I were special. That I was special."

"We are special, you are special, I love you and what happened with Dean won't ever change that. Nothing can change that. I promise." She tried reaching for him but he stepped back, making her face crumble more. "Please, Logan, I should've told you. I should've, but I didn't want it to change anything. And you're looking at me like I've —"

"Betrayed me? Yeah, you have.”

Sidney’s breaths grew laboured as his expression grew colder.

Dean shook his head, daring himself to speak, "Dude."

"No!” Logan yelled, storming over to him, “Don't you dare talk to me." Sidney rushed to step between them, setting her hand on his chest, cautious of the rage beneath her palm. "You know how much she means to me, and you touch her?"

Dean winced as his jaw ticked at the implication, "It was before you guys got together. A whole year."

"Do you not understand how fucked up this is?” Logan tugged at his hair, then rubbed at his forehead.

"Logan…” Sidney’s tone made him shut his eyes.

"I love you sidney, but don't touch me."

Sidney’s hand fell to her side; she gathered the strength not to stagger backwards.

He took a few steps back, himself, trying to regain some composure but the situation, no, the truth had rendered him out of sorts.

Dean tried, "Logan.”

"No, don't you get the thought of you, Sidney, being together makes me feel sick,” Logan blurted out, enraged by his voice alone.

"How could you say that?!”

"Because she's mine, Dean, mine!"

"And she didn't want me,” Dean extended his hand toward the trembling woman.

"But you still fucked her and you get to hold that over me."

The accusation hit them like a hot flash, jolting the exes to immediately defend.

Dean started, "We didn't —"

"I never slept with him,” Sidney rushed out, but she knew he wasn’t registering it. His judging eyes shifted between them, his fist clenched and then unclenched as he harshly swallowed their reality. She neared him, cautiously holding her hands up in defence, "I promise you, it was a few dates and kisses. And that's it."

Still, Logan’s expression was pained, "Did Beau know?” He muttered, mainly to himself, their silence was confirmation enough. “What am I saying? Of course he did. Trinity too, I bet, all just laughing whenever I was around."

"They wouldn't do that."

Logan laughed.

He laughed humourlessly, rolling his eyes that threatened to pour with tears, only his anger wouldn’t let them. It tugged them back and the ache in his chest gnawed deeper.

It was a few dates.

But they had lied about it for a year so how could he trust them now?

How could he trust Sidney?

She hadn’t lied before, but to him, this was monumental, and she knew it too, otherwise, she would’ve spilt the second they started dating. They were in love, or was that a lie too?

And now Dean stood in his love's dormitory with the intention of what exactly?

Suddenly, his glare found the blond, "Why are you even here man if she shut you down? Are you pissed that she chose me, that she wanted me, that she didn't just block me like she did you?"

"I'm not mad," Dean said, dolefully.

Logan's scowl deepened, "You're hurt, though, right?"

Dean's silence made him scoff before Sidney shakily spoke up.

"Can we please just calm down, please?" She rubbed the heels of her palms into her teary eyes. "I know you're hurting right now, Johnny, but please, just understand it's in the past."

"Then why was he at your fucking doorstep!”

She scrambled back, cowering at his scream, startling himself as well as Dean.

Logan took a step back immediately, guilt flickered across his face, and it started to make the anger he begrudgingly wore crumble.

Still, the hurt remained, but he couldn't stomach how upset she appeared, "Sid..."

Dean exasperated, "Don't take it out on her, John, alright, this is on me."

"Oh, I will happily take this out on you. Were you just waiting for me to screw up?"

"No."

"You didn't get to be with her before, and now you're hoping for another chance? How could you even show up here? How could you even do that to me?"

Dean groaned, "I don't even know, I just... I just wanted closure. I'm moving on, and I just wanted to understand why Sidney didn't see me as an option. But... but I should've left it alone."

He cast somewhat of an apologetic glance toward her, although she seemingly mirrored it.

Logan scoffed, though it sounded more like he was choking back a sob.

And when they turned to look at him, he was.

"God, I'm so fucking stupid. I'm second again."

Sidney blinked, "What?"

"Second at everything. Hockey, my family... you."

Her pout deepened at his words, "Don't, don't say that."

But it was his truth, and yet again he was hurt, by someone he thought he could trust more than himself.

He shook his head, after wiping his tears, "I need to go."

"Logan," Dean tried again, but Logan wasn't havinng it.

"And you need to get the fuck out!"

"John."

"Leave."

Dean desperately looked between the couple, then slowly nodded, turned around and left.

The door shutting behind him only made Sidney's hand twitch, she fought the urge to reach out to Logan.

"Baby please don't shut me out, just talk to me."

John winced, "I can't, because I don't wanna yell at you." Again. "I don't wanna make you feel what I feel right now. just... I need space."

"No."

Logan's eyes shut at the sound of her crying.

This is what he didn't want.

He never wanted to hurt her.

But he had to put himself first.

A pain-filled smile appeared on his face when he opened his eyes.

Slowly, Logan walked toward her.

Her pulse nearly deafened her, when he cupped her damp face.

"You're so beautiful."

Sidney melted in his kiss, it was messy, wet and sad.

Her fingers curled against the front of his hoodie, gripping it tightly.

But he managed to peel them away.

"Let me know when you arrive home, stay safe Sid."

And with that, he left, despite her pleading and begging.

When the door clicked shut, it was like her chest caved in.

Why didn't she just tell him the truth sooner? Why? Why not come clean? Why didn't she shut the door in Dean's face? Why is this happening?

Sidney's breaths were rapid when she fell to the floor.

She didn't even hear the door open again.

She could hardly feel Trinity's arms around her.

She couldn't even hear her loving words.

"It's okay, it'll be okay, I've got you."

a/n:

well, that was intense. do you think dean made the right decision coming to sidney’s dorm for closure? i think sid should've told logan when they started dating. do you think logan handled it well?

Sidney's gaze snapped up when she heard footsteps, in the tunnel outside the hockey locker room. A small gasp escaped her when she saw the familiar star hockey player and she gathered her things and chased after him.

"Wait, Garrett—wait up."

Deeply sighing, he stopped in his stride down the hallway. He really wanted to head back to the house after training that left his torso riddled with blemishes and bruises. His best defensemen were at war with each other, mainly Logan, but still, he couldn't stop it and neither could their Coach. And the reason why everything was a mess stood in front of him with an apologetic expression.

"Watkins," he greeted her with reproach, making her grimace.

"He told you?"

He quietly scoffed, "Of course he did. He's angrily doing housework and silently glaring at Dean whenever he steps into the room."

"Shit," Sidney muttered.

"Right, shit."

"I fucked up." Sidney admitted, "I know I fucked up."

"You did." Garrett agreed, then cleared his throat, "But he loves you and won't keep this up for long."

Sidney wasn't so sure, she knew Logan could hold a grudge, even if it were a short one, he could still hold one. Not even out of spite, he felt so much, and betrayal felt like every emotion bubbled constantly.

“He’s not talking to me Garrett," Sidney added as her frown deepened.

“Can you blame him? Even I thought something was going on between you and Dean. Well not right now, but he’s an obvious guy.”

Garrett also noticed Dean’s odd behaviour since his and Beau's birthday party, which coincided with the exposure of Logan and Sidney’s relationship. Come to think about it, it might've stung even more for Dean to discover that on such a big occasion.

“Fuck," she muttered, averting her eyes to the floor.

Garrett had to ask, “Why didn’t you just tell him?”

“'Cause the past is in the past.”

He sighed.

“Well, not anymore.” Garrett noticed her devastation and reiterated. “Look, as I said he’s gonna talk to you eventually. He’s stalking your socials daily.”

Sidney sadly hummed, “I know, I check to see when he does every morning."

“Of course you do.”

"It's a part of my routine."

"I bet it is," Garrett stiffly nodded, “But you know he’s the happiest he has ever been when he’s with you. Which is why I’m not worried about this.”

She tilted her head, then deeply gulped, “Just let me know how he is.”

“Miserable.” Garrett hated not being able to help his best friend, but he couldn't get too involved. “He doesn’t want to take it out on you. That’s why he’s taking the time to say the right thing.”

“Yeah he said.”

“Give him time.” He patted her shoulder, “And good luck with the quiz tomorrow.”

“Thank you.”

Sidney started to realise that deciding to catch up on her missed schoolwork in the medical room was a bad idea. Sure it was her safe space, and one of the few places on campus to block out the noise... the noise that was suffocating today.

Logan hadn't spoken to her properly since he left her crying in her room.

It had been a day, and now she was back from her family's home, still rattled by her constant overthinking and regret. Her parents noted something was wrong, and her dad even asked about Logan, to which she lied and acted as if all was well.

But it was far from it.

She had avoided the gaze of the players as she walked up the bleachers, past Coach Jensen who unusually had little to say and tried to focus on the words blurring across her notebook.

It didn't work.

The team was loud.

Usually they were, but this was anger.

This was hate and resentment, every clash or hit against the shielding, felt targeted.

And each time it was John Logan.

And on the receiving end, it was Dean Di Laurentis.

Until Coach Jensen, sent Logan to the penalty box, and Dean to be seen too, by Matlin, who bandaged him up pretty well, noting how Dean barely reacted, just sighed.

After Matlin went on his break, Sidney abandoned her work and slowly approached the drained hockey player.

“Jesus Christ.” Her eyes widened in shock, making him breathily laugh at her expression. “He does realise that the more he messes you up the more —"

“I’ll get checked up,” Dean nodded, as he plucked up his thermal and stiffly slipped it on.

Sidney's brows furrowed, “What does he think something's gonna happen?”

Dean cocked his head to the side, curious, “He hasn’t talked to you?”

“No. He just stares into the back of my head in classes.”

Sidney's voice quietened toward the end, making him wince.

Dean knew he should never have gone to her dorm.

Dean should've accepted that it was over and done with.

Dean should've left it alone, even though it gnawed at his conscience and weighed on his chest.

Dean sighed, staring sadly at her, "I'm sorry."

Sidney lightly shook her head and looked down.

"You're right, you told me he was gonna find out."

Dean tsked, "He shouldn't have the way he did. That's on me."

Sidney hummed, and then she sighed.

Those days away made her think. Think about how harsh she had been, how abruptly she had pulled away from him and scarred him like nothing. Was it out of fear? Maybe, but even a year ago, she didn't allow herself to sit in those feelings for too long.

She just acted like it didn't happen.

She just acted like Dean didn't happen.

"You deserved closure, you did." Her words startled him; they filled his uncharacteristically sullen expression. "I was wrong for how I handled the situation. Our... relationship. I'm sorry. I think it’s because I felt like I couldn’t control the situation. I went into… us thinking it wouldn’t be serious. That we wouldn’t catch feelings. It was unsafe, and that feeling only grew when I started catching feelings and so did you.”

Sidney gulped.

She continued, “I feel safe with Logan in ways I didn’t with you. And that’s not on you. I just went into my relationship with him with a different mindset. And I’m sorry.”

He glanced away, wondering if that was what he wanted to hear, what he had needed to hear for the last year.

An apology was good.

Maybe a Time Machine would've been better, especially to combat with the mindset she didn’t have back that.

Unsafe.

Unpredictable.

It hurt to hear, but now he understood.

He couldn’t fault her, even if he tried.

"It's okay," Dean said, slowly smiling, prompting a small one from Sidney. "And there she is."

"Shut up and make sure you ice those bruises, they looked yucky," She remarked, making him chuckle.

He said, "Great terminology for a future sports therapist."

"Gonna make them add it to the textbooks," Sidney innocently shrugged.

"Watkins et al."

"Watkins et al."

Their laughter died down when the door swung open.

Logan's glare was unwavering, when he first spotted their closeness and, second falling smiles.

“Seriously?” He scoffed, drawing an eye roll from Sidney.

“Don’t John." She strutted over to her belongings and began packing, "I’m serious. You’re the one who’s getting rough. I’m just studying.”

“And I’m just practising.” Logan clicked his tongue, then expectantly faced the blond who simply stared at him. “You got something to say?”

Dean shrugged, “Nothing that I can’t show you on the ice.”

“Okay big shot,” A humourless laugh escaped Logan.

“Can you both just get the fuck out? Stop messing around and just practice," Sidney snapped, shutting the pair of them up.

The silence they all sat in was heavy and harrowing.

So Dean started to walk toward the exit, "Bye Sidney."

"Bye Dean."

He didn't even shoulder bump Logan when he left the room, which irritated Logan more than it should've. He still had all this indignation that was waiting to be burst.

But the second he turned to see his girlfriend, his anger began to waver and his glare eased.

She wasn't looking his way, which only made him want to catch her eye.

Logan knew leaving her many texts on read, even snaps unopened cut deeper than he intended, but he couldn't put his thoughts into words and instead let her feel what he hadn't wanted.

Suddenly, Logan decided to strip off his gear and his thermal shirt.

He shamelessly did it, uncaring of whether she looked his way or not, or if their chiropractor, orthopaedic doctor and physiotherapist returned.

In her peripheral, Sidney noticed his slight winces, whenever his movements were too fast or too rough.

And before she knew it Logan was stood shirtless in front of her.

Immediately she scowled, noted his bruised shoulders, glowing from anger, and animosity.

Naturally, her hand would trace his skin, caressing and even kissing the discolouration.

But her hand remained occupied with her pens, pencils, and papers.

“I have classes to get to.” Sidney rapidly shook her head, “And you haven't been icing or taping your bruises well at all. Jesus.”

"I know, my head's been elsewhere," He retorted, eyeing her, noting her exhausted demeanour.

Logan swallowed the guilt before stepping closer.

Sidney murmured, "You know that's not an excuse."

"Well, I'm using it as one."

Her gaze dropped back to her bag, making him grimace.

Logan said he wanted space, but he couldn't really take it, not really.

“Did you do well on that quiz?”

His question made her sigh, “I did fine, you know that, I saw you staring from the back.”

Social Psychology was something Sidney adored, but didn't perform her best at in their last assessment.

“I got an A minus.”

Sidney tensed, “I got a B.”

Usually they’d study together, sit next to each other, in their unofficial assigned seats that no one dared to sit in.

But not this time.

“I... uh, wanna talk.”

Her shoulders sank a little when she grabbed her bag, “You sure, or do you want to keep blanking me and taking it out on everyone else?”

“Well I’m not gonna take it out on you," he said in disbelief.

"You are, just indirectly. And that's understandable." She argued, despite herself. “But I’m the one who’s in this relationship right, with you? I’m the one who withheld information.”

Logan scoffed before his reply, “He still has feelings for you.”

“They’ll pass.”

“It’s been a year and you’re irreplaceable Sidney.”

Sidney huffed, “You’re still corny, I guess that’s a good indicator. I'll drop by before I hit the weight room. No arguing, yelling. We can just talk.”

“As I said," he said nodding.

“Yeah, but you’ll probably wanna kiss me. And that’s not talking.”

Logan's face softened, almost moulding into a bashful smile, “Like you don’t wanna kiss me.” Had he been blinking he wouldn't have caught her lips curving upward, “Just talking. No more secrets.”

“No more secrets," she repeated, “And despite the roid-rage, you're looking good out there.”

“Thanks.”

She started strutting over to the door, passed him as he grabbed his things, no longer wanting to stand there shirtless for no reason. She could feel his gaze on her, so she turned as she reached for the handle.

“I really miss you.” I love you, baby, she wanted to add but it was still too sore.

“I miss you too.” I love you, gorgeous he said the quiet part with his eyes before she left the room.

a/n:

The second date Sidney Watkins went on with Dean Di Laurentis was a shock to both her and him.

She agreed on a whim, or at least that's what she told herself, when he asked her to sneak out of her ethics class to ask her out instead.

“You couldn’t have just texted me?” She asked, accusingly, folding her arms.

Dean countered, “Isn’t this more romantic?”

“A passing grade is romantic," She sassed, much to his delight.

“And so is a date," he cheekily grinned. "See you later.”

For their second date, he decided a professional hockey game would be a different pace. It would be familiar ground for the pair of them, although she didn't exactly dress for the colder environment, given it was a surprise.

Her pleated skirt wasn't long enough to cover her knees, although her slouching boots kissed them gently. Her sweater was only suitable for the concession stand, not in the actual stadium, which Dean teasingly pointed out.

That, and he was obsessed with the rectangular glasses she wore.

"Very Harry Potter," He quipped, when she pushed up her glasses as they walked through the hallways behind the crowds of fans.

Sidney rolled her eyes, "His were circular you ass, and believe me, I wanted them when I was a kid."

"But you settled with a Gucci pair."

"A tough burden to bear." Sidney said dryly. "But at least I have good eyesight."

"It makes you look hot, like an office siren."

"Oh really," She assessed his outfit, noting the thick flannel jacket that she craved to wear in this cold building. "You're giving lumberjack."

"I'll take that."

He guided her to their seats and helped her down, where she rested against the plastic chair.

His arm rested comfortably behind her, she stifled a smile before the game had started. She paid attention, sitting up in awe whenever the puck slid across the ice like a kid at Christmas.

Dean preferred looking at her, to the game despite one of his favourite teams playing.

When the first break was over, the second period started, players were substituted and the rink buzzed with chaotic energy, the fans roared with cheers.

Sidney had to ask, leaning in to ask, “So what’s it like spectating?”

“Different," Dean answered, smiling down at her.

She squinted, “But not better?”

“I like being on the ice too much," he said shrugging, almost itching to get involved. “The rush is exhilarating.”

Sidney hummed, “I get that.”

“What, is it your calling too?” He gestured to the ice where a player was harshly shoved against the shield, fueling the crowd with yells and ooze.

Sidney looked at him, feigning seriousness, “I only ever used to ice skate when I was like thirteen but stopped, I preferred roller skating.”

“Bad coordination?”

She gasped, “I’ll have you know I have great coordination.”

“You almost tripped getting up the stairs," Dean chuckled.

“And that’s why I have you.”

He raised a brow, “A ban aid over your thinly veiled —“

“Before you say anything else, do remember this is a date," She said, pointing at him with feigned sternness.

Slowly, he nodded, “You’re right, Siren.”

“Always am Lumberjack.”

The penalty box seemed to be overturned with players, much to Sidney's amusement.

But as the second period came to an end, she had realised how cold she felt and visibly shivered.

Her gaze remained ahead, hoping for some extra goals, before she felt a jacket draped across her shoulders.

"Dean..." She looked at him, he was only wearing a thin Henley, "You'll freeze."

"Well let's go and get some drinks to warm me up," he held out her hand, and she coyly took it.

The concession stand wasn't nearly as packed as she expected, drinks were still served and food was eagerly bought.

Sidney let Dean's jacket consume her as he ordered his favourite, still hand-in-hand.

She couldn't help but smile.

"Passionate fruit cider please," she told the worker, who nodded. When their drinks came, she raised a brow at his beer. "I don't know how you drink that stuff."

"I can say the same, I mean cider really?"

"It's sweet."

Promptly he held out his beer for her to take, and she let go of his hand, swapping their drinks.

He sipped hers with ease, making her roll her eyes.

She nearly choked at the taste of beer, it was too bitter and lacked taste in her opinion.

"Yeah, never again, get this away from me."

Dean chuckled, "too good?"

"Too shit."

He hummed, "Nice to know that you aren't too perfect."

"Not liking beer is an imperfection?" She huffed out a laugh.

"Yeah."

"Ass."

“Dean?” A familiar voice called out to them in the hallway.

The pair turned to see Beau walking alongside an older man with M&Ms and other chocolates in hand.

“Beau.” Dean's face lit up at the sight of his best friend, whom he greeted fondly, “Hey buddy.” then nodded hugged his dad, “Mr Maxwell.” He then introduced the pretty lady next to him, “This is Sidney.”

“Hey Sid.” Beau gave her a side hug, then looked pleased when he stared between her and Dean.

“You two know each other?” Mr Maxwell questioned.

“He’s in the ethics class you pulled me out of.” Sidney shook Mr Maxwell's hand, much to his delight. “Hi I’m Sidney and just ignore everything I just said.”

“Nice to meet you,” He chuckled at her response, then noted her and Dean's closeness. “You kids on a date?”

Sidney confirmed, “We are.”

“Having fun?”

“I am.” Dean drolly answered.

Sidney snorted.

Mr Maxwell smiled, “Well I hope to see you again Miss Sidney.”

“You too Mr Maxwell,” She replied.

“Later man.” Beau said to his best friend, then nodded at Sidney, “Bye Sid.”

The father-son duo walked the opposite way back to their seats.

Dean intently watched Sidney as she shifted on her heels.

“So much for being incognito," she muttered.

His brows furrowed, “He won’t share anything if that’s what you’re worried about.”

Sidney shrugged after taking a sip of her can, “I just wanna keep this between us.”

Dean feigned offence, “Do I disgust you that much?”

“No. I just like my business to stay my business.” She reasoned, then took a step forward, standing directly in front of him with a mirthful expression.. “And hey, you’re arm candy, that chiselled, GQ model look is a turn-on.” She cheekily grinned, “But don’t forget, ‘A good time and not a long time’.”

“Oh, I’ll never forget my vows," He mirrored her expression, towering over her, stirred on by her in his clothes.

“Good, because if you do, it’s grounds for divorce."

“Not even separation?”

“I like to keep my decisions definitive,” Sidney challenged.

He snickered, “Like no longer being an ice skater.”

“Yes.”

“And having passionfruit cider as a favourite drink.”

Sidney added, “And hating beer.”

“And loving me.”

“And tolerating you," She corrected, genuinely smiling up at him.

“And liking our second date," Dean said, fondly staring at her.

She reached up and pressed a kiss to his cheek, then patted it.

“And liking our second date.”

a/n:

thoughts?