sage ˖᯽ ݁˖

The waves rolled against the sandy beach as the clouds rolled in, dark and deep like the bottom of the ocean, smothering any light behind them from the golden sunset. The sea called to her, whispering unspoken worries that sent shivers down her spine.

Filming for music videos was always stressful. Huge box lights heating up the room, high-tech cameras capturing every flattering and unfavorable angle. Staff rushing to fix the makeup and hair for the members, directors and producers yelling cues, and the whole ordeal lasted a consecutive twelve hours.

BLOSSOM’s past few months have been busy for the five of them, especially the purple-haired vocalist. Coming off her three-year hiatus, she knew things would be hard. Adjusting to the idol life again, handling her relationship with Felix, and keeping it out of the tabloids. From their Special Album in September, Mini Album in January, then the Japanese Mini they are filming for now, and the upcoming summer album in June, BLOSSOM was in for a busy year. The girls wouldn’t lie and say it was easy, because it wasn’t.

They were tired, and that’s why on days like this, Rose was very ready to get back to their dorm. The only thing Rose was looking forward to was cuddling up in her bed with her kitties, freshly washed sheets and a vanilla candle lit.

“Cut!” The director yelled as the girls landed their ended positions for Wildside. A chorus of exhausted sighs fell from their lips as their arms dropped. They gave the staff their thanks and bows, and the girls were finally off the hook.

Rose ran a hand through her hair, her aching feet making their way towards their green room.

“Rose!” Sage called from behind her with the click of her heels. “Are you heading home?” The maknae asked as she caught up.

Rose turned her head to face her. “Most likely. Ready to just chill.”

A small pout grew on her friend’s pink lips. “That’s okay. The other girls and I are gonna go get some dinner. Want us to pick you up something to bring home?” Rose gave her a quick nod before she went bounding off to rejoin the other BLOSSOM members.

Their manager, Jade, was waiting outside, ready to have the driver escort her home. Rose changed quickly out of her performance outfit and back into her tank top and oversized sweats, she threw her bag over her shoulder. A soft buzzing from her sweats stalled her from her walk out of the green room.

INCOMING CALL FROM: brozone 1 <3

A heavy sigh escaped her lips, and her hand came up to rub at her tired eyes. Her thumb swiped against the screen, and she brought the phone to her ear. “Hi Felix.” She said.

“Hi, sweetheart.” Felix's sultry voice comes in. “Are you done filming?”

“Yeah, I’m getting ready to head home,” Rose replied listlessly. There’s a pause at the other end, a waiting for an olive branch that’s not extending.

“Do you want to come over?” Felix finally questions.

Guilt rushes through Rose’s body. She should want to see her boyfriend, she should want to spend her free time with him. How many times has she canceled on him in the last few weeks? How many times has she chosen to be by herself rather than be with him?

“Thanks, Jade, I’ll be back home later tonight. Promise.”

Rose watches the company van drive away, tires splashing up a puddle left over from the afternoon storm. The vocalist quickly threw the hood over her head as she steps onto the sidewalk and towards the apartment building.

Her heart races as the elevator dings onto Felix’s floor, thoughts swirling around her head. Rose takes a deep breath to steady herself before knocking once on the Stray Kids apartment door.

“Hi angel! You made it.” Felix coos as he spots his purple-haired lover. His strong arms reach out and pulling Rose into a tight hug.

“Hi.” Rose says softly, taking in the floral scent of his Saint Laurent perfume. The same bottle she gifted to him on their anniversary the year prior.

Felix’s soft fingers trail down Rose’s backside before the palm of his hand holds the small of her back, leading her inside the apartment. “No one else is here, so it’s just us.”

Rose gives him a simple nod, her eyes searching the apartment for anything else to pique her interest, attempting to avoid her boyfriend’s gaze.

The couch squeaks under the weight of him, his fingers clicking the buttons of the remote. “Come sit?” Felix asks, tapping the free cushion beside him.

Rose follows his request reluctantly, her hands staying in her lap as that feeling of guilt creeps up her spine. “The shoot went well today, finally finished everything.” She sighs, curling into his side. Felix hums in response, only wrapping an arm around her and pulling her closer.

WALL-E plays in the background, scenes passing by slowly as Rose’s mind races, thoughts of their relationship swirling around in loops. The beginning of their relationship, her hiatus, finally returning to BLOSSOM activities, and her avoidance.

What would herself from a year ago think? She felt no regret for ending her hiatus; she was happy to be back promoting with her members. Time with Cherries was near to her, and she spent her time off missing them.

Nonetheless, there was a gnawing thought, chipping at the back of her head. The unspoken, stomach-twisting idea that the inevitable was coming. Coming to wash over her, and the tide was going to pull her under.

The waves came crashing when the movie credits rolled.

“What’s been going on with you?”

Rose’s eyes widened and her chest tightened as her boyfriend’s voice cut into the air. She lifts her head from his chest, huffing in response. “What do you mean?” She opts for.

The cushions from the couch shift as Felix’s body heat pulls away from Rose. He leans back against the armrest, a flicker of anger in his deep brown eyes. “Rose…” He sighs. “You’ve been distant.”

A scoff forces its way out of Rose’s lips before she has the thought to stop. “I’ve been busy, Felix. We’ve been preparing like three new albums all at the same time, plus tour.”

“Yet you can’t even be bothered to see me.” Felix grumbles, rubbing his temple with his slender fingers.

“That’s not fair.” Rose huffed, crossing her arms across her chest. “I’m here right now.”

His eyes roll dramatically at her. “Barely. Every time I ask to see you, you’d rather be at home. You didn’t even want to come over, did you?”

“I-“ Rose's stomach drops, and she feels wet tendrils of the waves cooling around her ankle. Her breath is caught in her throat, her mind searching for an answer to give him. “Felix, I’m tired from the shoot today. Give me a break, I’m still getting used to our busy schedule.” She pauses. “I’m trying.”

Felix groans as he pushes himself off the couch, taking heavy footsteps past her and towards the hallway. “You say that every time, and I’m starting to realize you never mean it.”

Rose whips her head around to him and follows his actions. “Felix, are you being serious right now?”

“Yes, I’m being serious!” Felix barked at her, his eyes full of anger and his cheeks flushed. “I’ve given you plenty of time, Rose. Was that hiatus not enough time for you to figure your shit out?”

The water filled her lungs as she was pulled under. Tears burned at the corners of her eyes, threatening to fall onto the wooden floor. “I’m so sorry that I was so depressed that I need to take some time off. I almost left permanently, I almost went back home and left this all behind! And you’re upset that I’m still getting back in the groove?” She thrashed her arms against the surface of the ocean, trying to pull herself up.

“You aren’t thinking about me at all. About our relationship." His words laced with a poisonous sting, his hands coming up to his face to run over his tired eyes. “I don’t think this is working anymore.”

Rose couldn’t see the sky anymore as she sank deeper into the sea, lungs full of saltwater. “What?” She faltered, staring at him, brows furrowed. “What the fuck does that mean, Felix? You’re..”

“I think we should break up.” Felix clarified, his voice quieter now. “You... clearly don’t want to be with me anymore.”

“What?” A few more steps closer to him, and her vision blurs as tears burn against her red-hot cheeks. “Please just gimmie some more time, I know I’ll get better.”

“You’re asking for something I can’t give you.” His wet eyes meet hers, and he brings his sleeve up to wipe at his cheeks. “I don’t.. I can’t give you any more time, Rose. It’s been three years, angel. I don’t know what more I can do.”

Rose’s hands reach out to him, little sparks of nerves running through her fingers as she grips his shirt. “Felix, please don’t do this.”

“Is this not what you want?” He exasperated, pulling away from her grasp. “It feels like you’ve just been waiting for me to make the decision.”

“You think I want this?”

Felix scoffs at her, his strong arms leaning against the wall. “What am I supposed to think? You don’t come around unless I practically beg you for it.”

Rose is taken aback, her eyebrows furrowing at him. “You? Beg?” She replies, crossing her arms over her chest. “When I'm around you, I feel like I’m talking to a brick wall! You never actually listen to anything I have to say.”

“That’s not true!”

“Really? I mentioned the shoot earlier, and you didn’t even pretend to care.” Rose choked out.

His deep chocolate eyes meet hers, watery and sharp. “Then tell me! Tell me that you still want to be with me.”

The deep sea was cold, full of creatures of nightmares and legends of myth. No light from the sun, nothing to ease the frigid temperatures. Rose's body froze in the icy water, staring at Felix with somber eyes.

“I-.” A beat passes, and the apartment is almost silent, a clicking of water from the kitchen sink, the fan spinning in Seungmin’s bedroom just down the hall, the quiet ending credits to WALL-E.

“I think you should go.” Felix decides, wiping a tear from his freckled cheeks.

“Felix, please don’t do this.” Rose sniffled, her chest heavy and aching.

Felix took one look at her and sighed. “I’m done arguing, you’ve made your choice, Rose. I’ll text Jade to have someone pick you up.” He turned, blonde hair falling loosely out of his bun. “I’m sorry.” He said lastly, as he turned into his bedroom, door slamming behind him.

Lucky for Rose, the practice rooms were practically always open. Jade argued with her to go straight home, but Rose refused. Mumbling something about needing to practice more.

Breakthrough played loudly from the practice room speakers, Rose’s sneakers squeaked on the laminate floors as she ran through the choreography once more.

As the bridge rang through the room, the slick floors betrayed her, her foot slipping from under her. She tumbled to the floor, and a stinging sensation shot into her palms as she caught herself. “Fuck.” She choked out to herself, and more tears fell from her tired eyes.

She pulled her knees to her chest and laid there for a moment, crying silently to herself. Heart aching and body weak, until she finally lifted her head from the floor, running a hand through her hair as her eyes met her reflection in the mirror.

Just as she expected, her eyes were red and puffy, her cheeks tear-stained, and her hair disheveled. She sighed and pushed herself off the floor, stretching her arms behind her back. Her slow footsteps made their way to the speakers, pausing the song that had been playing on repeat.

As she thumbed through her missed notifications, the practice room door creaked open slowly. Her head shot in the direction of the noise, but she relaxed as her best friend’s faces registered in her vision.

“Rose?” Sage called out to her, Luella trailing behind the blonde. “Jade said you came to practice- Oh no, are you okay?”

Rose’s weak composure faulted, and her shoulders slumped. She looked down at the floor, avoided their gazes. “Felix and I broke up.” She spoke softly.

The two girls immediately gasped and quickly came over to her. Sage wrapped her arms around Rose, pulling her into a tight hug. “I’m so sorry, Rosie.”

“What happened?” Luella asked, placing a reassuring hand on Rose’s back.

Rose sniffled and returned Sage’s hug, laying her head on her friend’s shoulder. “We… he told me I was being distant, and I told him he had been dismissive and… He told me to leave.”

Luella gently rubbed circles on the purple-haired girl's back. “He told you to just get out?”

“He said he thought I wanted to break up.” Rose clarified, pulling back from Sage’s embrace. “When he asked me if I wanted to stay, I… didn’t know what to say.”

“You had been feeling conflicted about your relationship with him…” Luella sighed. “You don’t have to talk more about it. Just know we’re all here for you.”

Rose gave them a small smile and wiped the lingering tears with the back on her hand. “I know. I’ll talk more later I just… had to be alone for a bit.”

“You don’t need to apologize Rose, we understand.” Sage chimed in. “Come on, let go back home.”