@RussMarshalek

me: i almost just forwarded you a quiznos coupon

jacob: lol why

me: bc i feel like i remember you being into quiznos

jacob: yeah i like quiznos

haven't had it in forever the one near my parents' house closed down

fuck now i want quiznos

me: quiznos is terrible

jacob: what's wrong with quiznos

me: uh it's TERRIBLE

jacob: it's dope

me: it's awful

jacob: you're not allowed to judge sandwich places by their vegetarian options

me: says fucking WHO

jacob: they have good stuff that's just like chicken bacon and spicy barbeque sauce

why are you getting quiznos coupons anyway

Sent at 9:07 AM on Friday

jacob: the girl i like/went out with a few times hasn't texted me back since monday

Sent at 9:13 AM on Friday

jacob: i'm not going to quiznos today

you know where im going

goddamn POPEYE'S

me: people really like popeyes

they have good biscuits

like better than kfc

jacob: popeye's is amazing

yeah way better than kfc

me: kfc coleslaw is the shit though

i make a vegan version

jacob: seriouseats says it's the best southern fried chicken you can get anywhere

like, including actual fried chicken places in the south

Sent at 9:19 AM on Friday

jacob: can we at least agree thast quiznos>>>subway

Sent at 9:24 AM on Friday

me: mmmmm

jacob: if only because

at quiznos

if you point at a sandwich on the menu

and say you want that

they will fucking make it

Sent at 9:26 AM on Friday

me: subway is about customization

jacob: but they have MENU ITEMS

i don't want to fucking walk joey the sandwich artist through how to make something

when the instructions are right fucking there

me: it's about making sure

you get it your way

every time

jacob: then why bother having the menu

also subways smell gross

and every sauce is mayo-based

me: not true

sweet onion sauce isn't

honey mustard isn't

they have ketchup

jacob: oh yeah

i totally want fucking ketchup

on my like turkey ham and cheese thing

me: why not? what the fuck is wrong with ketchup

jacob: i ask for hot sauce and they're like

"is chipotle mayo alright"

ketchup on cold cuts?

ketchup is really good in a lot of situations

but that's not one of them

Sent at 9:31 AM on Friday

me: ketchup is good on legit everything

jacob: look i'm a huge ketchup proponent but it has its place

Sent at 9:34 AM on Friday

me: mmm.

yeah you also think

that TOASTING

motherfucking BREAD

is worth BUILDING A WHOLE RESTAURANT AROUND

jacob: oh also that like 5 chili sauce at quiznos

is legit

the best fucking thing

like hooooly shit

so good

like probably the best fast food condiment?