A suspiciously stingray-shaped patch of sand

Do whatever you gotta do to make sure you can tell your grandkids good stuff when they ask you what you did during the historic times you lived through

you can poke a cat to hear her noise

you seem avoidant for a girl who’s so hungry to experience the full breadth of human connection

Historically the Greeks (very broad version of that term) have indeed had a lot of military victories but it’s never not funny when they go “pfft what they can’t do anything they’re just barbarians” and then immediately get punched into next Tuesday

Personally I think that the Ancient Greeks had to invent the concept of hubris in an attempt to stop themselves from getting so full of themselves that they ran directly into a wall but it never worked

To this day a lot of Greeks are made uncomfortable by the idea that ancient Macedonia wasn’t Greek until they just kind of elbowed their way in there without much permission for a variety of reasons but one of those reasons is definitely that Phil and his son Big Alex kind of weren’t Greek and it was another instance of them going “barbarians? Conquering us? Yeah right” and then immediately having a piano dropped on their heads.

@apocrypals

And another thing! I hate that whole Da Vinci Code thing where people think the equalateral triangle is used as a feminine symbol because it looks like an abstract vagina. It doesn't!!! It does look very much a lot like a pubic mound, but that's not what you said. You said "vagina." You invoked trilateral pussy with sharp corners.

Ahhhh help they r tryign to uninstall my vercingetorix

vampirism is about how fucking impossible it is that you have to eat every fucking day or else

we need swimmable cities 

As per my last clay tablet,

CCing Ibbi-Ilabrat on this one just to make sure we’re all on the same page!

“The sesame is visibly dying” makes me lose it every time. My sesame #mysesame

this is your captain speaking. do you guys remember 9/11 [escalating clamor of passengers freaking out] woah woah hey hey i was just curious. christ. am i not allowed to make conversation