cradling the em dash in my hands what the fuck have they done to you

the unimaginable power of saying "huh, guess that's not for me" and moving on with your life

they should invent a disproportionate emotional response that goes away when you understand it's disproportionate. they should invent a way to logic yourself out of emotions

i wonder how many they'll need

i hesitate even to speculate

everything is getting worse and thats why it's SO so important that we have fun and hang out and play and im being serious im being unimaginable amounts of serious

if you're not playing mermaids with me then i have to assume you're playing mermaids against me

Sometimes having an OC is like "this character is an outlet for my insecurity and trauma" and sometimes it's like "this character is an outlet for my love of vampires :)". Sometimes it's both

Sometimes you think it's "this character is an outlet for my love and nothing more :)" and then you look it over later like "shit. product of the deepest depths of my soul again"

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Sometimes it’s the unyielding silence

Being an adult will have you unironically craving a vegetable

#when people tell you youre wrong when you are actually wrong: embarrassing! but tolerable #when people tell you you are wrong when RON SWANSON AT HOME DEPOT I KNOW MORE THAN YOU: #MOST HARROWING HUMAN EXPERIENCE.

“start your free trial now” what if i told u i am already experiencing trials. and the cost is more than i can bear

*spends all of my time alone* perfect! but why am i crazy

i would like to officially thank sesame for its seeds, its oil, and of course its street