HAHAHAHAH OFF YOU POP YOU RACIST CUNT

the usa doing this love and peace gimmick like they’re not about to drop another 5 bombs on iran while everyone is watching this mess

universe can make it up to me with a successful assassination

when they film american celebrities on the stands and neither me or the commentators know who they are but I can loudly say "who tf is that" while they sit in silence

Learning a new language really does make you aware of how many fucking words there are. Waaaaaay too many things in this world that need their own special little word. Grow up.

I will be ok when I sit by the sea for 5 hours

“my father is a boy and my mother is a girl so i’m mixed” is the funniest possible response to someone asking your gender and it came from 6’5 Viking footballer and notable weird little guy Erling Haaland on a Snapchat

do you ever look back at your relationship with someone on the internet and just think oh my god i’m so fucking glad i clicked follow they make my life so much better

Wednesday the 15th. What an excellent day. Middle of the week, middle of the month. Truly, we are in the middle of things.

fiction can be really dangerous there might be a deeply tragic woman in there who starts living in your head forever

im always up at ass o clock doing god knows what

if you're having trouble sleeping the best you can do is put a bright object close to your face and look at it for at least 30 minutes. if that doesn't work you can close your eyes but make sure to think really hard about a bunch of bullshit

"what groceries u been into recently" is actually a great question, there's a bunch of good conversations inside it

I live a very balanced life of noticing things nobody else does and not noticing the things that literally everybody notices