well here goes ^_^

probably my skateboard. i mean i've run out onto the road to save it numerous times xD ... not good ... not good at all :/ 

think about it. what or who makes you happy. make sure you know that because it may help you on the next dip on this roller coaster.

I hate the thought of trains, People pushing their ugly faces up against the glass, The glass i have to look out of, Almost everyday i'm here. It's cold or wet, Hot and stuffy, There is never a good day. Voices from unseen places, People in small places, And un recogniseable faces. Go to your places, Hide your ugly faces, Just take me home, To my dusty road, The only place i belong.

The dragon heart i know you are, Buried deep and buried far. Let me into the darkest part of your scared heart, I'll be your bard, and hold up this flimsy heart when it's hard, Just remember it's not hard to touch your heart of hearts. Has love really been that harsh, Love has scared you in that place to? I have felt it's searing pain. But i let you in was i wrong to? i guess i was since you hurt me to, i loved you until the end, it is the end anything to say? all i say is goodbye, go fly, be happy with this new one, just don't hurt him aswell, because when your done i won't be there. ive had enough of your wicked ways, enjoy your lonelyness, my heart has stopped beating for you.

but don't ever think i want to be rid of you, because that hurts most of all.

If i say i'd do anything for you don't doubt me, If i say i trust you, Please don't make me regret it,  Love.Youth.Narcotic.Narating.Elegance, This is who i love, and why.

forever and always. you'll be having it your way and i'll be loving it. :3 

when i was 9 i had my first suicidal thoughts to memory, i was stood over the river bollin urging myself to jump of course i never did. i found a coin shaped battery in my pocket and it gave me an electric shock, that one little shock stopped my from jumping entierly. it made me think what is this made of what's inside, how does his small battery work and i thought of my family. what was i thinking i couldn't leave them like that could i? no. my suicidal thought's didn't stop there, i thought of three way's to kill myself after that if not more i even got so far one time as to write a note on my wall i wanted it to look nice for them, y'know a last memory of someone may aswell look pretty, i didn't finish writing it i thought of the battery and it saved my life againi was going to hang myself off of my high level metal frame bed. another time i was going to climb onto the roof to see if i could inadvertently fly, i could never find a way onto my roof. i was going to jump out my window but i figured the fall wouldn't kill me. the last time i remember feeling suicidal i had a rope i'd brought back from holiday once, tied it to my hands, made a noose to put around my neck put it through my bed slats and let myself start to suffocate that moment i was soo close to death i felt my whole body go numb bellow my neck like your leg does if you sit cross legged too long with a bad circulation. that moment so close to death i felt so alive, it felt nice. it was one of my first proper high's. probably my only proper high ever. i wish i was dead but i can't leave, too much i'd leave behind and break on the way.

TATTOO'S I WANT!!!!!! :D only envy greed and wrath from the second one