Ritu Sangha

Dear Little Ones

You are too young to understand the tragedy that has struck you. You are too little to comprehend why you!

I wish I had words of wisdom to help you make sense of the loss that will forever haunt you. I hope your mom is enough for you, for she is certainly capable. Be kind to her. Be kind to yourselves. Be patient. 

What you don’t have to be is strong. And you don’t have to be brave. None of you. Not today. Not the next few days. Not until you think you want to be. Be what you want to be for yourself, not because someone asks you to. Mourn and grieve the loss of your dear father. Try and remember things that made you all smile together, put them into letters. When the world feels too dark, open one or more letters and be with him all over again. Remember he loves you. And he will want to see you happy. 

A must read and must share piece of internet comes by every so often.

So I must share “A letter to young Muslim girls if you are considering leaving the UK to join ISIS" by Sara Khan

All my life I have run into people who make light of birthdays.  These are often healthy adults who are heard saying things like What's to like -about one year lessened of my life! These are often the people who color their hair to appear younger. And of course fund the mansions and Mercedes of the plastic surgeon kinds.

Me... I celebrate each and every one of them. And not just my own.

One of my favorite advertisements is the one where some gorgeous women grace the screen with the background singing - 'when I grow up, I want to be an old woman!' http://www.adforum.com/creative-work/ad/player/12660206

My mom's Mother died at childbirth. Mom was adopted by her very loving aunt and uncle, who gave her a very caring and loving childhood. Grandma doted on us, like most do, but also dies rather young. Mom often wonders if things would have been better for her brother and her had their own mother lived - to see a few more birthdays. If only the other mother could have been around to see us graduate and get married...

On the other hand, my dad's mother lived to be 95. It makes me happy to have known her, however briefly, for I got to see the love of this grandmother.

My father got to see my children. My father-in-law didn't.

My mother-in-law got to see my children, but they don't remember too much.

Don't we wish every day -and at each birthday, if only they could see how their grandsons as upstanding, kind and loving young men, they could be proud to call their own. I know they would have danced at each of their accomplishments, big and small. They should have had the chance to spoil them and teach them their goodness and tell them stories. Stories of past glory of the family, country and religion. Stories of life, love, sacrifice. Stories of Jinns and Bhoots, of Rajas and Princesses. Stories of their mom and dad's naughty antics, and shying away from school and such.

I celebrate each and every birthday. I want my children, my nephews and nieces and the friends of all these children to have long happy and healthy lives.

I want the chance to wish a Happy Birthday! and see the smile that ensues inadvertently on the faces of most people. I want to hug and bless and laugh at the happiness that each birthday means.

I want to celebrate lots and lots and lots of birthdays.