Finger prints don't fade from the lives we touch

Hey tumblr Its been awhile...

When I started this account I was leasing a horse and dreaming of owing one... two years ago I bought A 10 year old Ottb, he was and still is my heart horse. but damn have we been through so shit in two years time I got about 6 months of solid riding the rest we have been dealing with saddle fitting and scratches so bad he had to get vaccinated for it (its been six months and is almost gone) and the endless back issues of this beautiful sweet horse. finally after hock injections and bring looked at by a few vets. having saddle fittings every two weeks for a few months to chiro, acupuncture and massage. and retiring him two times and calling it quits He's getting seen by a specialist that I should have probably gone to in the first place. 

I have lost my one job a few months back it went bankrupt and i didn't get paid for my last month of work. I still have my teaching job but thats only twice a week on weekends so money has not been free flowing.  I have spent so much money on this horse I don't dare count it but its over probably 10x his original  value. and I just hope to god that for once we can finally find a solution for him, I can 100% know whats wrong and we can treat it or I can give it up and retire him for good knowing that was the only option I had.   I could have saved my money and bought the fancy hunter i always wanted, I could have bought a warmblood that didn't weave and have back issues but I loved him I genuinely Loved this horse and thats why i can't give up until i know that i have tried everything under the sun to fix him.