That could have gone better.

What do you mean by that though? ‘if she aint blue she wont do’ ….?

An old friend mentioned it and it kind of stuck i suppose. 

Who’s clung onto you?

Im not opposed to dating the same sex or gender or whatever youd use to express such a thing but im on a strict ‘if she aint blue she wont do’ policy. Majorly because last time ended so terribly. Not for me, but for him. Sorry if that sounds rude to you simon.

MY REPUTATION.

I am your wife. I am allowed to do this. Im putting my motherfuckin’ foot DOWN.

You too! Well things got pretty shitty earlier, but they’re better now! What about you?

Im well. Trying to detach this clingy being from around my waist because i have to leave. He absolutely refuses to let go and he has quite the grip i tell you. Not one you can manage to slither away from unless you have a copious amount of lotion on your body at that precise moment in time which is highly unlikely unless you can well, predict the future and all that it entails. Ridiculous, really. Its a shame that i have to work or i would have made him dinner.

…Sorry bout that uh, I’m Simon, nice to meet you, Jay.

Nevertheless, its a pleasure to meet you simon. How are you faring this evening?

natu what the fuck