1. Shower, brush your teeth and put on clean clothes

2. Eat regularly; include some fruit and veg in your diet

3. Get out of the house at some point in the day

4. Get at least 20 minutes of exercise

5. Listen to some comforting or meaningful music

6. Talk to at least one other person

7. Think about 3 things that could make life worth living

How to make stress your friend by Katie McGonial (14.5 minutes) 

“Stress. It makes your heart pound, your breathing quicken and your forehead sweat. But while stress has been made into a public health enemy, new research suggests that stress may only be bad for you if you believe that to be the case. Psychologist Kelly McGonigal urges us to see stress as a positive, and introduces us to an unsung mechanism for stress reduction: reaching out to others.”

8 secrets of success by Richard St.John (3.5 minutes)

Why do people succeed? Is it because they’re smart? Or are they just lucky? Neither. Analyst Richard St. John condenses years of interviews into an unmissable 3-minute slideshow on the real secrets of success.

A simple way to break a bad habit by Judson Brewer (9.5 minutes)

Can we break bad habits by being more curious about them? Psychiatrist Judson Brewer studies the relationship between mindfulness and addiction — from smoking to overeating to all those other things we do even though we know they’re bad for us. Learn more about the mechanism of habit development and discover a simple but profound tactic that might help you beat your next urge to smoke, snack or check a text while driving.

Don’t regret regret by Kathryn Schulz (17 minutes)

We’re taught to try to live life without regret. But why? Using her own tattoo as an example, Kathryn Schulz makes a powerful and moving case for embracing our regrets.

How to make hard choices by Ruth Chang (14.5 minutes)

Here’s a talk that could literally change your life. Which career should I pursue? Should I break up — or get married?! Where should I live? Big decisions like these can be agonizingly difficult. But that’s because we think about them the wrong way, says philosopher Ruth Chang. She offers a powerful new framework for shaping who we truly are.

The danger of silence by Clint Smith (4 minutes) 

We spend so much time listening to the things people are saying that we rarely pay attention to the things they don’t,“ says poet and teacher Clint Smith. A short, powerful piece from the heart, about finding the courage to speak up against ignorance and injustice.

How to speak so that people want to listen by Julian Treasure (10 minutes)

Have you ever felt like you’re talking, but nobody is listening? Here’s Julian Treasure to help. In this useful talk, the sound expert demonstrates the how-to’s of powerful speaking — from some handy vocal exercises to tips on how to speak with empathy. A talk that might help the world sound more beautiful.

Your body language shapes who you are by Amy Cuddy (21 minutes)

Body language affects how others see us, but it may also change how we see ourselves. Social psychologist Amy Cuddy shows how “power posing” — standing in a posture of confidence, even when we don’t feel confident — can affect testosterone and cortisol levels in the brain, and might even have an impact on our chances for success.

The happy secret to better work by Shawn Anchor (12 minutes) 

We believe we should work hard in order to be happy, but could we be thinking about things backwards? In this fast-moving and very funny talk, psychologist Shawn Achor argues that, actually, happiness inspires us to be more productive.

A call to men by Tony Porter (11 minutes) [TW: graphic desc. of rape] 

Check through the list below to see if you have traits of codependency. They include:

1. Feeling responsible for other people’s thoughts, feelings, behaviour or physical, mental and emotional well being.

2. Repeatedly putting the needs, wishes and wellbeing of others before your own needs, wishes, and wellbeing. Caring for them takes precedence over caring for yourself.

3. Feeling compelled to be there for others. Feeling most comfortable when you are putting yourself out for others … or are doing everything you can to support them … or are desperately helping them to find solutions. At the same time, you feel guilty about asking for help from other people.

4. Staying in relationships that have little benefit to you, and may even prove to be harmful or abusive. Excusing and tolerating poor treatment for the sake of maintaining peace and harmony.

5. Repeating the pattern of going from one unhealthy or abusive relationship to another. Having low self worth and low self esteem.

To break the self destructive patterns above:

1. Recognize that you have a tendency to be drawn into codependent relationships, and make the decision to change this pattern. This will require acknowledging that these types of relationships are actually unhealthy (which may not be obvious to a codependent person).

2. Understand that breaking these ingrained patterns is very difficult to do alone. Consider working with a counsellor to identify the roots of the problems, to separate out what are healthy patterns of relating from what are unhealthy patterns of relating. Learn how to establish healthy appropriate boundaries. Work on saying “no”, and putting yourself first.

3. Step back and allow others to accept full responsibility for their words, responses, reactions and behaviours. Recognise the facts that it’s not your job to be responsible for anyone other than yourself. Don’t assume the blame when other peoples’ lives go wrong.

4. Keep your focus on yourself and your own needs and problems. Remember that you also have your own life to live

5. Understand that the right thing to do is to take care of your own life and needs first, before looking out for the needs of other people. That’s not being selfish: that is being a healthy, responsible adult.

This is a fairly long answer, so I’ve made this post into a ‘read more’.

Fiction:

The A Song of Ice and Fire volumes by GRRM

The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde

1984 by George Orwell

Lord of the Flies by William Golding

Macbeth by William Shakespeare

Richard III by William Shakespeare

Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn

Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden

À la recherche du temps perdu by Marcel Proust

Dracula by Bram Stoker

American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis

Men Without Women by Haruki Murakami

Non-fiction | Self-help, Relationships, Psychology

Insecure in Love: How Anxious Attachment Can Make You Feel Jealous, Needy, and Worried and What You Can Do About It by Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD

The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—And Keep—Love by Amir Levine, M.D., and Rachel S. F. Heller, M.A.

All About Love: New Visions by bell hooks

The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom by Don Miguel Ruiz

The Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz

The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene

Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl - A Woman’s Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship by Sherry Argov

Non-fiction | Psychology

How Pleasure Works: The New Science of Why We Like What We Like by Paul Bloom

Joy, Guilt, Anger, Love: What Neuroscience Can—And Can’t—Tell Us About How We Feel by Giovanni Frazzetto

The Mind & The Brain: Neuroplasticity and the Power of Mental Force by Jeffrey M. Schwartz, M.D., and Sharon Begley

The Mask of Sanity: An Attempt to Clarify Some Issues About the So-Called Psychopathic Personality by Hervey M. Cleckley

The Interpretation of Dreams by Sigmund Freud

Non-fiction | Strategy

The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene

The 33 Strategies of War by Robert Greene

Mastery by Robert Greene

The Art of War by Sun Tzu

Non-fiction | History

Sapiens: A Brief History of Human Kind by Yuval Noah Harari

21 Lessons for the 21st Century by Yuval Noah Harari

Non-fiction | Beauty and Skincare

Feed Your Face: The 28-Day Plan For Younger, Smoother Skin and A Beautiful Body by Dr. Jessica Vu

Eat Beautiful: Nourish Your Skin From the Inside Out by Wendy Rowe

Making Faces by Kevin Aucoin

Face Forward by Kevin Aucoin

Pure Skin: Discover the Japanese Ritual of Glowing by Victoria Tsai

Non-fiction | Self-help, Etiquette, Refinement

Style by Kate Spade

Manners by Kate Spade

Occasions by Kate Spade

Emily Post’s Etiquette, 18th Edition: Manners for a New World by Peggy Post

Choosing Civility: The Twenty-Five Rules of Considerate Conduct by P.M. Forni

How to Be Lovely: The Audrey Hepburn Way of Life by Melissa Hellstern

The Butler Speaks: A Return to Proper Etiquette, Stylish Entertaining, and the Art of Good Housekeeping by Charles MacPherson