reva’s posts

Inspired by our discussion in class I thought that this apology video was fitting as a "confessional" vlog. In this video, Logan Paul apologizes for showing a very graphic suicide scene and treating it as a joke. It is regarded as one of the worst apology videos ever.

like all the greatest literature of our century, the 20 before 20 list starts in my notes app

it is fueled by the urge to push myself out of my comfort zone, and partially by the movie I have just watched that makes me want to LIVE

as the name suggests, it is 20 things I would like to do before I turn 20

The number 20 scares me.

no longer a teenager, fresh out of high school, naive in the best possible way, no longer 19

not quite yet an "adult" who can do adult things like drinking, having dinner parties in their apartments, not yet 21

it is an in-between that has always taunted me from the shadows

everywhere I go, I feel the passage of time, I feel the cool breeze of the past and present slipping away from me, and descending into the slippery chaos of the future

who will I be at 20? will I have the same friends? will I still laugh the same obnoxious way? will I still blast my favorite songs just a little too loud in the shower at 12 am? will I insist on a little sweet treat after every meal?

I guess the thing about growing up that no one can ever warn you enough about is the fact that nostalgia punches you in the face everywhere you go

nostalgia is the heights marked on your childhood house's wall, the lavender shade of your childhood bedroom, the stuffed animal you got in the 1st grade that has been left behind

eventually, your and your sibling's heights will be covered up with a fresh white coat of paint, the lavender of the room painted over, and the stuffed animal thrown out because it is old and dusty

as my mom always said "you can't control things, but you can control your response"

none of this has become a reality yet. I'm typing this from my childhood bedroom, snuggling up with my unicorn stuffed animal, and thinking about the future

in the present, all I know is that there are 20 things I want to do before I'm 20. and I'm determined to do all of them, for the past, present, and future me. nostalgia has a time and place, but I won't let it stop me from living my life to the fullest

[some of the things on my 20 before 20]:

learn how to play the guitar

consistently journal

go on a road trip with friends

The Great War by Taylor Swift highlights a big argument that Taylor Swift had with her boyfriend. The song uses a war to compare battles to how the fight progresses. "It turned into something bigger Somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed Your finger on my hairpin triggers Soldier down on that icy ground Looked up at me with honor and truth Broken and blue, so I called off the troops That was the night I nearly lost you I really thought I'd lost you"