do you want. my hanky.

in my dictatorship every man will get a decibel meter implanted on his neck and when he talks above a measured conversational volume his head explodes

"focaccia, serves 4" yes all 4 me

"tiramisu, serves 2" yes all 2 myself

“Pie, serves 8” yes I 8 it all

You are not a bother. You are not a burden. You are not a waste of space. You are not annoying every person you talk to. Your existence matters. Your presence makes a good difference.

sometimes I almost forget slut is a derogatory term. it's so friend shaped to me. I love when things are slutty. I love sluts and slutting it up. it's a cute word. make every day sluttier than your last. sluttttt

the kink bloggers found this post and are putting horny stuff in my notifications but I'm not even mad. the sluts are in the notes of the slut positivity post. all is as it should be.

a warthog is a thog specialized for use in war

“my father is a boy and my mother is a girl so i’m mixed” is the funniest possible response to someone asking your gender and it came from 6’5 Viking footballer and notable weird little guy Erling Haaland on a Snapchat

I’m guessing the world cups going well considering fans of both teams are threatening murder-suicide

Do it scared but please don't do it hungry. Please don't do it dehydrated. It's gonna make it so much scarier. Please.