Renny knows

______

“I mean,” Peter said with a shrug, “I used to sell pictures of myself for money. Maybe I should do it again.”

Tim nearly choked on his drink.

Steph blinked. “...What kind of pictures?”

Peter snorted. “The kind people paid stupid amounts for if I got caught in the middle of things.”

Duke’s eyes widened in horror.

Peter kept going, blissfully unaware.

“I mean, it wasn’t THAT bad. My... uh... sponsor made sure I was taken care of.”

Tim stared. “Your… sponsor.”

“Yeah,” Peter said casually. “Found me when I was fourteen.”

Dick’s voice exploded through the still-active phone call Tim had forgotten to hang up.

“WHAT.”

“Honestly, he kinda ghosted me after he was done with me though.”

Steph made a strangled noise somewhere between sympathy and fury.

Duke looked physically ill.

“To be fair,” Peter continued, “I DID crash his—”

He stopped.

“...Uh. I mean, I was involved in a plane crash. Uh. His plane.” Peter rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. “He felt bad afterward and offered me a deal which i turned down?”

“What kind of deal?” Duke whispered.

Peter froze for a second too long before replying, “...An internship?”

Nobody believed him.

Not even remotely.

“After he died I spiraled a little,” Peter continued quietly. “Trusted the wrong guy.”

Tim’s stomach dropped.

Peter rubbed at his face tiredly.

“And then he uploaded a video of me to the internet.”

Jason’s voice immediately cut through Dick’s phone speaker, where he had been listening in on.

“HE WHAT?”

Steph slapped both hands over her mouth.

Duke looked ready to commit murder.

Tim had gone eerily still in the way Bruce usually did.

Peter noticed the silence and finally started looking uncertain.

Determining he should probably just finish the story, he continued, “I tried to fix it, but I screwed everything up and lost everyone.”

The room fell into horrified silence.

Peter looked around. Realized far too late that he had completely obliterated the mood. And promptly panicked.

“ANYWAY,” he announced way too loudly, “I’m broke again. Maybe I should start selling pics again, hahaha—”

“ABSOLUTELY NOT,” Duke said instantly.

“No,” Tim agreed immediately.

Somewhere on the other end of the line, Dick had gone suspiciously quiet with a darkened expression over his face that spelt trouble for the people that hurt his family, and Jason didn't feel like stopping him anytime soon.

And Peter....

------

Peter: Actually, my body can move without me.

Jason: ...Excuse me?

Peter: Yeah. My soul doesn't need to be in my body for it to keep moving.

Tim: Okay, no. Nuh uh. What does that sentence mean???

Peter: Which part?

Jason: THE PART WHERE YOU APPARENTLY DIE AND KEEP WALKING AROUND???

Peter: Oh my God, dramatic much? I don't die. I just got shoved out of my body—

Dick: What?

Peter: —but the other kept it running.

Silence.

Jason: The... other?

Tim: There is another... guy?

Peter: Well, actually, it might be a female? But no, more like... a presence.

Jason: There is a PRESENCE inside you.

Peter: Yeah! The Spider!

Bruce slowly lowers the newspaper he has absolutely not been listening behind.

Bruce: The Spider.

Peter: Mhm. I mean, there’s a reason I went with Spider-Man, you know? Unlike some people who are just straight-up furries. *side-eyes Bruce*

Steph makes a strangled choking noise trying not to laugh.

Jason: Peter. Define “The Spider.”

Peter: You know. The instinct. My conscious subconscious. The thing that pilots my body when I’m not home.

Dick: When you are not— *deep breath* Peter, has this “Spider” ever controlled your body without permission?

Peter: No? Technically, it only comes out when I can’t give permission? *laughs*

Everyone stares at him.

Peter: Okay, wow. Tough crowd. *checks his phone* Oh crap, gotta go.

Jason: Nope. You can’t just waltz out of this conversation.

Peter: Jeez. Why is this such a big deal?? You literally came back from the dead. *points to Dick* He has a prophecy about him. *points to Tim* And that one is missing a spleen!

Bruce, Dick, Jason, and Steph: *turn to Tim simultaneously* You are missing a spleen?????

Tim: Uhhhh, hey! I told you that in confidence! He is getting away! PETER!

--------

Inspired by Peter and Jason fucking with the Batfam by telling them Peter was in a cult in the fic Existential Crisis Mode.

Seemed like a good idea, at the time…

Act 1 | Act 2 Pending

Page 28-29-30 of my Double Edged fancomic!

page 1-2-3 page 4-5-6

page 7-8-9 page 10-11-12

page 13-14-15 page 16-17-18

page 19-20-21 page 22-23-24

page 25-26-27 page 31-32-33

Feel free to tip a coffee! :)

Mama Bearsuke came in the chat

The comic I did for ‘Fall Into You: Tales of Shance Anthology’ back in 2019-2020 I don’t remember if I have ever posted this. Anyway… enjoy! I was worried I will have to put in a warning for the bug band so I made them as cute and simple as possible xD,,,, Choosing a song was really hard, I wanted something that will automatically play in your head when you start reading. 

frightfullytreeish:

man-thing:

DOCTOR STARK WAS SO ANNOYED HE WENT AND GOT FOUR MORE

#HAHAHAHAHAHAHA #OH TONY #I mean presumably this is just writer inconsistency #but I like to imagine Tony Stark is the kinda guy who gets doctorates out of spite #HE HAS A DOCTORATE IN SHUT UP STEVE #PHD IN PETER PARKER YOU AREN’T AS FUNNY AS YOU THINK YOU ARE