hematic capsaicin

do you ever just … picture a whole scene, a whole fanfiction in your head, you know how to place every single word of the english dictionary that you need (or your language dictionary), you know how to structure your sentences, you know just what your characters are going to say to each other and then… and then you just open microsoft word.

Its the doc! The blank document steals the ideas from. Your brain!!!! If you want to keep your ideas,, do NOT look at the doc when you open it, look STRAIGHT* AT THE KEYBOARD and write the first words to pop into your head! Once the document isn't empty it, takes away its evil power over you

Strange and scary naturals

I told my little nephew that I'd wave at his airplane when it flew over my house today, and he very calmly and politely explained that it wouldn't be possible to see me due to the limitations of human vision. I said he just had to squint real hard, and he took a deep breath and went into the toddler version of "see, what you're not understanding–"

Went to a fabric store yesterday and saw a sewing machine that did embroidery of photos and the example was of a newborn baby and it was so fucking insane looking I asked an employee if I could buy it and she looked at it and was like “oh my god eugh what the fuck… i think that’s my bosses grandkid….I think you should just take it” so I did

please dont vape your blueberry ice flavor around my kid. we are raising him on marlboro reds exclusively.

You never know what color pallette someone's Tumblr is till ppl are screenshotting posts and tags

Oh wow.

Some people on tumblr are reading ancient scrolls and you'd never know

teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek