aroace yelena belova supremacy

i have a very special scenario in my head of shane who is used to feeling like this and finding a quiet place to assess what tf is happening to him rn so he can decide if cold water on his face or hospital.

(not even considering the fact that hiding away while potentially having a life-threatening allergic response is an AWFUL move).

and i am especially endeared by the idea of it going from him going off and doing this by himself to ilya clocking him leaving the room in a way that says Not Okay and following him and the two of them in just a quiet little pocket of space together, with shane having already handed over his auvi-q (the version of an epipen that fits in a suit pocket) just in case.

OH MAN in vegas, ilya canonically was freaking out ahead of time in anticipation of seeing shane again, so i posit that he was denying that he was freaking the fuck out and was trying to lie to himself and say it was just low blood sugar, so he grabbed something from craft services backstage.

and it's fucking. peanut butter crackers.

THIRD OPTION: EXTREMELY UNFORTUNATE TIME TO PURSUE FINGER SUCKING AFTER ILYA WAS PICKING AT THINGS DURING THE WAIT FOR SHANE TO SHOW UP AT THE PENTHOUSE BUT ALSO DRINKING VODKA SO SHANE DOESN'T SMELL IT ON HIS BREATH

OH MY GOD I DIDN'T EVEN THINK ABOUT THE FACT THAT HE WAS THE ONE WHO FOUND HIS MOM

AND THE FACT THAT THIS IS PROBABLY SO EXTREMELY ON HIS MIND GIVEN HOW CLOSE HE IS TO GOING BACK FOR THE SUMMER AND THE MEMORIES THAT WOULD HAVE ALREADY DREDGED UP

oh my god WAIT

ilya who remembers when the responders who came to the house took his mother away, and he never saw her again, and it's totally irrational, but he manages to get shane's epipen and help shane use it, and then he helps shane get dressed so he can get to a more neutral area before he calls for an ambulance, and he's SUPPOSED to leave. he's going to leave. it's just going to cause some uncomfortable ass questions if he doesn't leave and has to come up with a story about why he was with hollander and why he's with him now and why he still hasn't let go of him even though he has him back in his room now.

and yet.

again: IRRATIONAL. he KNOWS it's irrational. but there's a part of him that's still thinking, "if i let them take hollander away right now, then i will never see him again." because he's BEEN HERE before. and it doesn't make sense, but trauma and fear NEVER do.

so ilya ends up going with him.

and listen. shane atp?? nauseous, still can't fully breathe right, still not fully present. in his right mind, he'd be sending ilya the FUCK away because embarassing and also doesn't want questions. but in this moment?? can't feel anything but relief when he climbs in the ambulance with him to ride along because he's at least someone familiar in the middle of all of this.

and then at the hospital, they get shane stable and ilya should go. he should totally go. he knows he should go.

and yet he doesn't. he's already here. there's already going to be questions. it's a little bit reckless and a little bit fuck it, but the damage is already done. might as well stick around until he can be sure that shane is actually okay. it's not like he's going to sleep tonight after this because jesus FUCK.

and texts keep coming through on shane's phone, but shane is sleeping, and ilya keeps seeing "Mom" and "Dad" pop up over and over and over because obviously the hospital contacted them. and ilya KNOWS he shouldn't answer. but shane can't do it right now, and there's parents worrying about him, and won't it just stress him out if he wakes up to thirty phonecalls-

and on call number thirteen from Mom, he picks the phone up and answers.

and yeah yuna is confused as FUCK why ILYA FUCKING ROZANOV is answering her son's phone after she got a call that shane had been admitted to a hospital because of an allergic reaction, but she also doesn't have a lot of other fucking options for getting updates on her baby, so fine. talking to this cocky ass kid it is.

except...he doesn't sound cocky? he actually sounds...almost sweet? he's answering questions as best he can and even tries to read some stuff in the notes the doctor left guided by what yuna tells him to look for. and she's on her way to the airport right now to get there and asks ilya to tell shane that she'll be there as fast as she can because he hates being in the hospital by himself, and in a moment of TOTAL fucking impulse ilya says he'll wait.

and he does.

the first time yuna and ilya meet face to face outside of that first elevator scene is when yuna finds him by her son's bed in the hospital keeping him company so he wouldn't have to be alone.

yuna hollander is going to unknowingly begin shifting the hollanov rivalry narrative years early because that ilya rozanov doesn't seem so bad after all, and her shane deserves another friend. so! fuck the league and the media and the fans!! she's going to make it happen!!! she is going to encourage shane to build this friendship, and she is going to ask after how ilya rozanov is doing during her calls with shane, and she is going to get them an ad campaign together to repay ilya!

i canNOT remember their names, but i saw a video of two hockey captains who have an ongoing bit of doing rock, paper, scissors with each other after games to see who loses and has to get off the ice first, and i feel like that's the shit shane and ilya would be pulling in this situation. like they are still SO fucking competitive with each other and anyone can see that.

but they're also the kind of competitive that has people taking surreptitious video clips of them chirping the FUCK out of each other while playing pool at a bar after a game together.

they're already using first names. if The Vegasing wasn't enough, ilya gets invited to go get dinner with shane and yuna after their commercial shoot together (because yuna was already going to invite him, but now that she has a different frame of view for him, it registers for her that he's always done these shoots and events on his own, and the idea of him going back to a hotel room by himself (lmao yuna) while she and her child go get food together is sad), and yuna has already decided ilya is Same Age As My Child Shaped before he's anything else so 0 chance she isn't first naming him now, and if his mom is already doing it...well...shane might as well.

(really man got speedrun through Worst Case Scenario vis a vis allergies and is a little scarred but shhh it's fiiiine)

like maybe it becomes a Thing that ilya will get dinner with them when they've travelled to see a game shane is playing against ilya (not knowing at all that this very sweet inclusiveness IS cutting into their fucking each other's brains out time), and I'm just 🥺 imagining them watching ilya for the first time leaning over to look at some tiny ass print on a menu about allergens for shane because he didn't bring his glasses and the restaurant is dark (picked for privacy), which is NOT helping

OH MY GOD

ilya and shane end up having their "what are we?" talk because yuna and david are trying to save shane from heartbreak by gently and casually asking who ilya is seeing because they heard so and so was pictured with him but haha that boy does have a reputation. god love him, but he really does love to sow his wild oats.

and shane does get a lil jelly because it comes up over and over and ends up just mentioning it to ilya the next time they see each other because ilya could tell he was upset and atp they do know each other pretty well

and they end up having a "what, you want me to not sleep with other people?" "do you not want to sleep with other people?" playing chicken standoff until one of them folds and now the cards are on the table and tbh?? they see each other not infrequently, and they already hang out at places together and it's not world shattering news if they're seen getting dinner together because the friendship narrative is already so established. so yeah. let's do it.

OH NO THEY HAVE A JOKE ABOUT BEING BROS

like they get a lot of coverage as friends, so the joke is like. them fist bumping after sex because yeah. just bros being bros.

BUT UNFORTUNATELY this means that shane (who wanted to come out before dropping the "I'm dating ilya" element) calls ilya, puts him on speaker, goes, "ilya, are we dating?" and ilya goes, "what?? no, of course not. we are just bros, hollander. don't make it weird."

Batman: *examining a crime scene with his kids, grunts*

Red Robin: *cocks head an inch to the left, then leaves the rooftop to take care of a mugging*

Batman: *turns his head a fraction to look at Spoiler*

Spoiler: *midway through wrapping a lucky knife graze on her leg, holds up bandage*

Batman: *softer grunt, turns head another fraction to look at Black Bat*

Black Bat: *thumbs up, falls backwards off the roof edge to go help Red Robin*

Military guy: what the fuck

Batman: *produces small flashlight from pocket, points it at evidence nearby*

Robin: -tt- *begins bagging the evidence*

Batman: *flicks flashlight at a wall 30m away*

Nightwing: on it, B! *stops walking on his hands and goes to get the surveillance footage*

Red Hood, who has been slowly prowling in circles around the crime scene, with his guns out, seemingly ignoring everyone: *heavy sigh through the modulator*

Batman: *ignores*

Hood: *hesitates on a step*

Batman: *spins round, looking for the enemy*

Hood: *waves him off, recognising the person five roofs away as Huntress*

Batman: *returns to scene with a grunt*

Random military guy: VERBAL-

Robin: Do you really need your orders spelled out for you? Mother ensured I grew out of that by the time I was five.

Random military guy: wha-

Robin: You've not even been following the conversation we've all been having, have you? Civilians are so rude.

Random military guy: Who are you calling a civilian?!

Red Hood: This is Gotham. Who are *you* calling a civilian, army boy?

Random military guy: I am never letting myself be talked into vigilante-wrangling again. The Lanterns were fine, but not in Gotham. Never again.

Hood: S'what I thought. Relax, new guy, we'll have you out of city limits by dawn and you can go back to your cushy job on base.

Random military guy: Cushy, are you ki-

Spoiler: You get paid, my man. That's automatically cushy.

Batman: *wounded grunt*

Spoiler: No, you cannot just pay for my apartment. I will steal your credit cards and do it myself, like a grown up.

Batman: *hums*

Robin: You realise you just told him that he's indirectly paying your rent and he's going to be skipping around the cave now.

Spoiler: *finishing wrapping the bandage* Gotta throw him a bone sometimes.

Spoiler: Especially because I think this knife may have been poisoned.

Batman: *abandons crime scene, scoops Spoiler up and leaps off the roof to the Batmobile in less than five seconds*

Random military guy: Insane. You are all insane.

There are no levels in knitting, there are no exams to pass or goals to achieve before you can continue.

The Handsome Chris is a perfect beginner project. It's all one color, it's knit flat, you get to learn lots of new techniques all at once, but most of all it's engaging and you're working towards a goal you really like.

I would have impaled myself on my needles if I'd been forced to complete a Sophie scarf before I got to advance to something more "challenging" like a washcloth, or God forbid a ribbed hat.

My very first project was a self-drafted 11-strand intarsia double sided cable scarf, because I didn't know I wasn't allowed and that was what I wanted to make.

This attitude of mystifying certain fabrics as advanced really twists my stitches. I cannot do simple stockinette colorwork to save my life, but I can 3-color brioche without looking.

There are no levels in knitting.

like, I know the feeling well, I myself don't think drawing is hard. you put a pencil to paper, and you are doing it. but my experience in teaching drawing does tell me that it's hard for people to get over the learned self-reflection of "am I doing it right?", it's hard to have an idea, put it onto paper and then analyze WHY the drawing on paper isn't the way you envizioned it, and it is hard to then plan accordingly and adjust your drawing based on that knowledge.

The whole problem is that these skils (knitting, crocheting, drawing, etc) have been developped over centuries if not millenia. These skills have width and depth.

it's true that there's no preset levels of "learn this first, and then learn that", but there's definitely skills that are more superficial, and ones that require a deeper settled understanding of the tools you are working with, so that you can actually use the thinking part of your brain to process what you are doing and how that affects the larger craft as a whole.

and ilya is like holy shit. they gave this boy an eating disorder so bad he can't eat fruit.

(reference to this post)

OH MY GOD WAIT NO

they came over to have dinner at the cottage and it turns out shane was out of something they needed, so david volunteered to go get it, so he makes a grocery store run, and shane, ilya, and yuna are on the porch just sipping on drinks and maybe snacking on something and waiting while making smalltalk, and ilya has a !! moment of, "oh, shane, you should text him and ask him to buy mangoes. you don't have any." THINKING he's being a good boyfriend reminding shane of something he loves that he must have forgotten while doing the shopping because he must have been as nervous as ilya was (aw <3).

and then yuna just *sharp look up* "mangoes?"

and ilya (STILL JUST THINKING THIS IS "oh yeah, i'm NAILING showing off being a good boyfriend") affectionately nudges shane's shoulder with, "yes, i cannot believe you have forgotten to buy any with how much you love them"

and yuna immediately "shane!! you're eating mangoes? you KNOW better!"

and ilya knows by now that yuna is where shane gets his intensity from with hockey, and now he's torn between wanting to make a good impression but also wanting to be a good boyfriend, so he tries to thread the needle between the two of those things with, "is okay. really." because he doesn't?? really know why yuna would be this intense about mangoes??? when they have eaten pasta and hamburgers together by now?? and she seemed fine?? that seems strange?? but this HAS to be related to hockey, so maybe it's a weird diet thing, and he knows how much shane is a people pleaser, so he's trying to SO carefully and delicately push back on shane not getting to have something he clearly loves so much for some weird reason his mom is pushing.

and yuna who is STILL LOOKING ONLY AT SHANE, WHO IS DELIBERATELY *NOT* LOOKING AT HIS MOM "shane! they're bad for you! you know that!"

and ilya REALLY doesn't understand what the fuck the big deal is, but if she thinks mangoes are somehow hindering him as an athlete: "really, i promise, is fine. he has them every single time we meet up, and he is-"

"shane! what is the matter with you!"

and now finally shane REALLY can't stay quiet anymore, but he is still NOT looking at anyone in a way that now has ilya pausing and going "...hmmmmm" because now shane looks SHIFTY in a way that is making him think this is more than some weird hockey superstition or fad diet thing. and shane (who gives ilya a quick dirty look for telling on him to his mom, thanks a LOT, dude) is like, "it's really not that big a deal, mom, i just take some benadryl and-"

"not a big deal NOW, shane, but you KNOW allergies can get worse with repeated exposure."

and ilya ??!! "allergies????? what allergies????"

a few ways this could happen, but chiefly of which i imagined: injury scenario, quite possibly the concussion from cliff. shane drugged up and loopy when ilya visits him in the hospital waxing poetic abt how ilya is so nice and shane loves how he always has mangos for him because no one ELSE lets him have mangos (big pouty shane face here). and ilya is like. why does no one let you have mangos shane. and loopy filterless shane is just like oh yeah because im allergic! not BAD allergic but my mouth gets tingly and kind of burny for a while and sometimes i get hives. but its worth itttttt. and ilya TRAUMATIZED is like no it is NOT WORTH IT. i have been poisoning you??? for Months????? he is SO betrayed. this could also happen later, not during the concussion, but during some other injury incident during the post-cottage pre-tlg gap, where ilya is caring for a loopy shane for whatever reason and the secret gets out-- which draws out the length of time ilya has been spoiling shane with mangoes AND thus increases the level of betrayal/guilt on ilya's part.

option three is that it comes out during Dinner With Mama And Papa Hollander during their time at the cottage... not that first meal maybe but the dinner the next day. like, as a fun anecdote yuna and david bring up shane's allergy to mangos and how it was DETRIMENTAL as a kid because he loved them so much it took them so long to realize he was allergic, and even after he'd always find ways to run off to get his mango fix, haha ... wait ilya whats wrong why arent you laughing. meanwhile shane (whose attempts to shut his parents up with increasingly wide eyed Looks all failed) is thousand-yard-staring like a dog who got into the pantry and ilya is just LOOKING AT HIM. like. shane. shane is there something you would like to tell me. were you ever GOING to tell me. or were you just going to let me KEEP POISONING YOU for the REST OF OUR LIVES . look at me shane LOOK INTO MY EYES. and he's just having a whole crisis realizing he was made an unwilling agent in shane's mango-eating agenda... (though there is A bonus point in the form of: ilya's EXTREME distress over accidentally poisoning his situationship-boyfriend-soulmate endear him very much to yuna and david. shane's going "its a really mild allergy ilya its fine!" and ilya, going through the five stages of grief preemptively, is half-yelling back at him "WELL IT MAY NOT STAY MILD IF YOU KEEP FUCKING EATING THEM. YOU KNOW HOW ALLERGIES WORK SHANE YOU HAVE MANY OTHERS WHY DO YOU DO THIS" and yuna and david are like oh .... he Loves Him... our baby's in good hands ❤️)

anyways i hope u enjoy this humble contribution to the shallergies posting 🙇

oh my GOD

it's an attempted playful callback to the vodka being his reward in vegas, and shane is a little more honest by this point and is just *makes a face before he can stop it* make it something i actually want.

and ilya still trying to be playful is just "oh? and what do you want, hollander?" and HE'S kind of playing at going for a round 2, but shane is blissed out and is honest anyway so just *wistful sigh*

"mango"

and ilya obviously is fucking delighted because this is so Classic Hollander. he's going for sex and hollander?? is thinking of mangoes?? okay, you bizarre person. ilya must have you carnally once more.

and the next time they meet up, ilya has remembered this and is being playful when he offers up a mango (100% just playing it like a bit), but shane is genuinely visibly delighted before he can stop himself. he doesn't buy them for himself because obvi he knows they're bad for him

...but...if he didn't buy it...it would be rude...to NOT eat it... :) oh no :) guess he has to eat this mango :)

BUT it continues being a joke that shane only gets his mango after sex, WHICH MEANS! ILYA HAS NEVER BEEN AROUND FOR THE AFTER OF SHANE EXPERIENCING A REACTION TO THIS GAME. HE DOESN'T KNOW.

and shane like. logically knows he should probably say something, but atp it would feel awkward being like, "soooo by the way, i'm allergic to this so you should probably like. stop." and he also doesn't want to risk being rude/making ilya stop wanting to be playful with him or seeing him because he made it weird. and he's SO disciplined all the time. ALL THE TIME. he is SO disciplined.

buuuuut if he's already indulging in this with rozanov...really...what's being a little itchy for a day or so with a rare mango treat. it's not like they meet up THAT often. and this is for SURE the last time so it doesn't matter. it's for SURE the last time. NO more. for SURE no more. last fuck last mango.

...for SURE.

.........after the NEXT one-

and by the time they get to the cottage, like. shane knows he's going to have to tell him. but there's priorities above and beyond The Sex Mangoes between them, and ilya had to cross an international border so it's not like he brought any with him, and shane obviously doesn't have any in the cottage. so like. that can be a Later conversation.

...except for the fact where they're talking to yuna and david about them as a couple and ilya says something offhand to a question about their relationship to the effect of, "just mango by mango" meaning it to be like. playful and sweet and nudge nudge at them having a cutesy couple thing.

but shane who can FEEL both of his parents look to him sharply is just

I spent several minutes just staring at them (and trying to convince them to bite my fingers.) When my sister’s violin lesson ended, her teacher came out to the yard and explained that these goldfish were the same small creatures that were often unfortunately sold in plastic bags at state fairs. They were only about two inches long apiece, when she bought them and put them in the new, empty pond. In essence, they were like every goldfish I had seen before, but they had been given a much larger, much richer environment in which to flourish. As a result, they had grown into some of the most remarkable, vibrant creatures my twelve-year-old self had ever met with. All because of a pond.