it’s not there

Hello, hello, HELLO, HELLO?

Hello?

Hello HELLO hello hello HELLO?

Hi.

Hello.

Helloooo?

Hello?

Hellooooo? Helloooo?

Hello?

Hi, I was hoping to borrow your broom, if I could, just for a few minutes? Just, uh, you’d be helping us out, we’re stage hands here.

Hey, you know what, quit, could you please fu- could you please quit fucking around with me? You realize this is a charity line? A pediatrics aged charity line, for children? Why are you such a fucking asshole?

I need a BROOM!

You know what? Why don’t you suck my…

I need a BROOOOOOM!

Why don’t you suck my fucking dick, man? I’ll (unintelligible) if I ever get my hands on you. You scumbag motherfucker. Quit calling this number.

You gave me your number.

You got that?

You gave me the number.

Bullshit. I never gave you this number, and stop calling me. Alright?  ‘Cause I’ll just call ATT and get your number.

I NEED A BROOOOM! I need a broom!

You need a broom to fucking put the shit back in your mouth, asshole.