BUT HE'S RESTLESS AT NIGHT

sometimes I see posts like this and wonder what this post must be like for people who don’t play mtg. this joke must have an entirely different texture if you don’t know who this man is and what he has done to me personally

i can only assume he debated steven universe with you

many women are excited to get old and weird, but i have great news that it's fully possible to become weird now, before you get old. just imagine the heights of weirdness you will be able to reach in fifty years if you get started now. that's what I think

man if you're disabled you've GOT to find some way to make your fuckass body a source of pleasure whenever you can. jacking off. eating good food. wearing soft clothes. kissing an animal on the head. whatever you can do

4. the character's fetish and i'm committed to portraying them with absolute accuracy

i love whenever theres a discourse around what kind of sex it is moral for heterosexual women to have (where the morality of the sex acts obviously fall onto the woman) not because it’s enjoyable, interesting, fresh, or remotely good for women or the feminist movement, but because you do get some immortal lines every time. from the recent twitter discourse, “enjoy the blowjob, but REFLECT on it” could be my tagline

My favorite trope is “janitor in headphones continues cleaning through extreme action”

I’ve been the janitor in headphones and trust me it’s an act we just don’t wanna be involved in the nonsense

“come, let us march against the powers of heaven, and set black streamers in the firmament to signify the slaughter of the gods” is such a raw line you’d think it’s from Shakespeare, but it’s actually from the slightly earlier Elizabethan dramatist Christopher Marlowe

Every demographic of marginalised men on the planet expects the women they share a marginalisation with to simply shut up and tolerate the abuse they face from said men in the name of "not dividing the community". And yet every single time this comes up you get people batting as hard as they can for the supposedly liberatory right of men to tell women to shut up and telling you that you're only talking about it because they're [marginalisation you also experience]