l’ennui du sonny

what i had in the kitchen was pastina, butter, chicken broth, parmesan, and black pepper, so i put the mfs together and made pastina al formaggino

can’t wait to get this shirt in the mail jajaja yeah dude 🙌

and it was for $10, which incidentally was the same price as the aforementioned pretzel i was gonna get at the farmers market but didn’t because fuck that shit

i’m glad i held on to that $10 for something way better

then when i decided to get a snack, i found i couldn’t afford a pretzel lmao

so i got my favorite fruits veggies and left

i'm just grateful that i get to learn drums and play drums in a safe space amongst non-judgmental friends, and i need to just be open.

for context, yes i was in jazz studies and composition for two years in college, but as a vocalist, not an instrumentalist. even though i've had a drum set since 2009, and was a drummer in a strings combo for one gig, i largely didn't know how to play and i'm self taught. it wasn't till we formed this band in 2024 when i finally took the time to teach myself how to play on a serious level. so i learned how to play via playing songs.

the one advantage i had when learning how to play was my already-existing basic understanding of music through my short but once-serious background in trumpet and piano.

i'm still gonna compose for my own future projects whatever and whenever that will be. and will likely branch out to other bands once i become more advanced and confident that i could jam with anyone.

but till then, i'm making peace with the fact that, yes, my current band is a cover band. a part of me dies when i say that out loud because it's not what i wanted us to be, but again, i still consider myself a beginner drummer, and i'm grateful to learn and grow with them.

so, no original songs and no cover songs done in a unique way. cool.

they have no idea how hard i work to write and arrange music, and then take time (about double the amount of time) to orchestrate it though music software so they can hear the arrangement i want (since two of them don’t read music), only to have it either rejected or ignored. it’s highly likely because of the limitations of the music software i use, it only gives you the idea of the song structure i want but not exactly the actual sound i want.

the best example was when i created a cool arrangement of a very old 1800s song and made it punk/rockabillly. but they ignored it and said they don’t hear the potential in it. BUT when i dug deep and found a popular band that actually did the same song with similar arrangements, they were all about it.

this is a new idea for a cover song, don’t mind the random photo lol

“sunshine, lollipops, and rainbows” by lesley gore

original version is here: https://youtu.be/atY7ymXAcRQ?si=Q3HEbP9_OGhvGikr

I used my ukulele and threw some filters in to give it distortion, and just made up the baseline and drum part. I basically did this to demonstrate that this can be done in a modern rock style, because someone in my band just couldn’t hear it in their own head so I gotta do all this to show them smh

my argument was that with the bare minimum level of creativity, you can make a lot of old songs pretty punky

because this country is the way it is, i'm being forced to raw dog my type 2 diabetes because my doctor, insurance, and the pharmacy have to hash it out and decide whether or not i'm gonna get my meds. meanwhile my hunger pangs have been burning my innards, and i've gained 5lbs over the past few days because my blood sugar is all over the place.

fine.

so i found myself at the grocery this morning having to get a bunch of vegetables (can't even have fruit) for my next few meals. while i was at it, i had it in mind to make my wife a plate of cacio e pepe tonight so i got some pecorino. $12 for 7oz wedge of pecorino?! i still bought it, and that's on me.

but i paid over $50 for what was mainly vegetables and some cheese.

it’s always wild to me when people judge others through the eyes of their own reality is if it’s the only one that’s valid

it brings me back to my one of my favorite books “breakfast of champions” where one of the main characters believes he’s the only person that matters and everyone else are just robots

i never wanted us to be a cover band. but they have a point. when it comes to block parties and crowds of the sort, you gotta play familiar tunes to keep everyone engaged.

this is our third year together and we haven’t made any moves in moving towards performances as a “feature” band. i’ve written a few original songs already, enough to actually record an EP and perform in clubs, but we’re still hung up on doing cover songs.

i’ve suggested doing cover songs completely different or do cover songs of really deep cuts. but they’re hell bent on doing popular songs, and they way the original bands have done them.

i think this is the curse of having attended only two years of music school. i know enough to write and think well outside the box, but not enough to be able to get those without a formal musical background to see creative possibilities.

i was trained that if you’re gonna remake someone else’s song, you do it completely different, and you make it yours. but it’s a challenge to do it well, and i’m realizing that takes time that not all of us have.