Rachel Bee

at least its better than thinking about the past

suggesting “kill them” as punishment for an extremely disproportionate crime  (”he stole my eraser” “kill him”)

staring at an object that has fallen over for a prolonged amount of time and with inordinate disappointment

*points at a garbage can* “that’s me”

zooming really far into someone’s face on snapchat

*something minorly inconveniencing happens* “@god what did I ever do to you”

“what are you doing” “my best”

shortening words that are already shorter versions of other words (ex: thank, congrat, welc)

10+ Galaxy Sweets That Are Out Of This World

Really nice recipes. Every hour.

Example:

Trump: “Your thighs are fat.” Me: “Fuck you and your fucking wall.”