im so fucking normal

(with unconstrained lust and heart shaped pupils) hey. I liked your wordplay.

Me: i support the fetishistic nature of this content but NOT the mischaracterization

shout out to my partner coming home from work one night to me watching MASH and doing a puzzle and immediately saying "goddamn it's like a nursing home in here"

It’s a Kind Thing with Ears A Tail and A Nose. It’s called “Puppies” and it can have any name.

the necromancer's skeletons have started wearing little hats

you know who’s gay? paul the real estate novelist who never had time for a wife and davey who’s still in the navy and probably will be for life

New headcannon: everyone in that song is gay except the Piano Man who has no idea he’s playing at a gay bar and the staff and regulars have a betting pool on how long he’ll take to finally figure it out. So far John is ahead.

“The manager gives me a smile ‘cause he knows that it’s me they’ve been coming to see” also implies that the Piano Man is possibly an incredibly attractive but oblivious himbo, and if you listen to the rest of it imagining that, this all fits a little too well.

this makes too much sense. Also, the full quote is “Now John at the bar is a friend of mine. He gets me my drinks for free. And he’s quick with a joke or to light up your smoke. But there’s someplace that he’d rather be” Yes, your bed, he wants to be on your bed honey, that’s not a joke, he is flirting with you.

Lighting another man’s cigarette is some old-school gay cruising.

You know, good on him for just rolling with it.