Lucas: whats a sugar daddy?
Mark: *points to taemin*
Kai: *points to taemin*
Taeyong: *points to taemin*
Ten: *points to taemin*
Baekhyun: *points to himself*

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@realisticexoquotes
Lucas: whats a sugar daddy?
Mark: *points to taemin*
Kai: *points to taemin*
Taeyong: *points to taemin*
Ten: *points to taemin*
Baekhyun: *points to himself*

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Suho: *announces his enlistment*
Kai: today I lost my dear friend Suho
Suho: quit telling people Iām dead
Kai: sometimes I can still hear his voice
Baekhyun: Iām a winner winner chicken dinner
Xiumin: youāre more like a game hen
Baekhyun: how?
Xiumin: youāre better roasted
Exo-Ls: *guessing that xiumin and d.o are the most likely to have a secret wife and children*
Chen: guess what?!
Chen: you know itās ok to admit you made a mistake
Chanyeol: whatāre you talking about I always add salt to my coffee

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Baekhyun: we cant lose because we have this *points to self *
Suho: a heart?
Baekhyun: what? No.
Baekhyun: we have me
Suho: Iām enlisting on may 14th
Sehun: *waiting across the street from whever junmyeon is stationed for crosswalk duties*
I just wanna talk about how the only kpop group Iāve ever seen/ met was infinite and it was back in 2013 when I was 10 years old and didnāt know what kpop was and didnāt fucking realize who they were until 3 fucking years later and I was watching their destiny MV trying to figure out why the fuck they seemed so familiar
Interview: whats the hardest thing for you guys to say?
D.O: I was wrong
Suho: I need help
Baekhyun: worchestire sauce
I'd quarantine with bbh. We'd be playing video games and can be loud together and be introverted when needed. It would be bliss
Honestly this is such an elite. Youād never be bored quarantining w bbh

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Lucas: do you think I could fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth?
Mark: youāre a hazard to society
Baekhyun: and a coward do 20
Sehun to Suho: Iād walk through fire for you
Sehun: but not fire because thatās dangerous. A humid room. I would walk through a very humid room for you
Sehun: but not too humid....because my hair.
Sehun: whats an orgasm?
Xiumin: itās that paper craft where you make cranes
Chen: bitch thatās oregano
I'm glad you were able to get the missing sleep back ^^ enjoy your day ! ^o^
Thank youuuuuu anonšššI hope you do too
Junmyeons tattoos?
Ajagsh my sleep deprived ass forgot to put in junmyeonās fake tattoos š
Iām referring to the time he had the members names tattooed on his back at the exoploration concert in Seoul last July

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Exo as my playlist names
Xiumin: āmore espresso, more depressoā
Suho: āThis is why you shouldnāt give me the auxā
Lay: āMotivation to get thicc thicc actualā
Chen: āI was Wattpad emo in 2014ā
Baekhyun: āmiddle school me turns up as I drive over curbsā
Chanyeol: āthis playlist is the reason Iām a fake redneckā
D.O: āsongs to be embarrassed I liked in 6 monthsā
Kai: ā songs that make me feel like Iām wearing a leather jacket with sleeve tattoos and driving stickā
Sehun: ā songs I grew up listening to bc my parents are boomersā
iād choose jongin bc as much as he is a high energy man, i feel like heād also be so utterly lazy and thatās just my type of vibe. someone who will laugh uncontrollably at funny things that happen but will also just lie down next to me and we both just play on our phone while enjoying each otherās presence. id actually enjoy it if he spontaneously got up and started dancing and id probably ask him to teach me something too tbh
Thatās sounds like literal heaven rn