In other 'Successful Parenting' news:
My preteen now stops at the school office and calls to inform me that he will be an hour late because the big snow hill is extra big, or he is going to a friend's house!
This is because on the day he came home 2 hours late WITHOUT informing me, instead of grounding him for a month and taking away his screens (like his friend's parents had) I acknowledged that he'd had no way to know that informing me was important, but it WAS, so could he do it in the future please? I might have worried that he was hurt, or lost!
So now he calls me, and I thank him, and we both express delight about the size of the hill/the joy of having friends! No anxiety, just him being proud that he remembered.
(It's important to recognize when big punishments are to make YOU feel better, and when they're actually meant to teach lessons.)
now if he does deliberately fail to inform you, THEN you come up with an appropriate punishment, but the explanation always ALWAYS comes first.
You cannot EVER give a punishment for something the child did not know AHEAD OF TIME was wrong.















